[loser_child]

okay. it's been a long three years that i've been SIing. i just want to know any reasons why you would want to stop. i know most of you don't, but i'm still trying to find a way to stop or if i really want to. just wondering.

[Zenobia]

I already wrote an extended verson of my reason for stopping in the thread "reason for stopping" started by Rapunzel so I will give a shortened reason here.

It is simple. I want to be happy. Self injury prevents that from happening. I have relied on it to help me cope for 24 years. It made things bearable but it never made anything better. I got tired of life being intollerable and limping along hurting myself just to make it through the day. Yeah, I could continue to live that way. That is how I survived for over 2 decades. I just am not willing to waste any more of my life in a half existance based soley on surviving the current crisis. Instead I have decided to face the stuff that I have hidden from all these years. I decided that even if it means my world will be destroyed and I have to be destroyed in the process so be it. In fact I nearly was destroyed. Now I look at self Injury is something that holds me to those things that I have worked so hard to free myself from. As long as I hurt myself I will be chained to the demons who ravage my spirit and I will never be free.
Carrie

<font color=green>But the implicit and usually unconscious bargain we make with ourselves is that, yes, we want to be healed, we want to be made whole, we're willing to go some distance, but we're not willing to question the fundamental assumptions upon which our way of life has been built, both personally and societally.--Bill Plotkin, Soulcraft

[loser_child]

you've got a point. there are some perfectly good reasons to stop, the only hard part now is actually stopping. how did you deal with that? and anyone else out there that doesn't have a T that stopped successfully, could you share? i really would prefer not to go to one.

[Zenobia]

I will have to step out of the conversation because I don't know how I could have gotten any where without my T. I had buried everything so deep I couldn't have touch it if he hadn't helped me. Anytime I went near any of it I would dissociate into la la land. Even things that seem so little to me now made my mind slip away. He had to help me retrain my brain so I could face the stuff that I was hiding from.
carrie

<font color=green>But the implicit and usually unconscious bargain we make with ourselves is that, yes, we want to be healed, we want to be made whole, we're willing to go some distance, but we're not willing to question the fundamental assumptions upon which our way of life has been built, both personally and societally.--Bill Plotkin, Soulcraft

[SunshineGold03]

Its best if you can bring yourself to see a therapist. Therapist can help see and understand things that you yourself are not able to do. Generally speaking SI is a means of coping. Therefore, the best to cease SI behaviors is to find a healthier means of coping with difficult situations. A therapist can help you to uncover those healthier ways of coping. Good Luck!

[loser_child]

thanks for the advice. i might consider it in a while since summer is starting and i'll probably end up SIing out of sheer bordom. for now, i really seriously don't see SI being a problem except for the fact that it makes others around you uncomfortable.

[auntchrisfun]

write me loser child

My reasons for stopping:

1. It reinforced my not feeling I could deal with life
2. It reinforced my self destructive thoughts
3. It reinforced my avoidance of real issues in my life

Those 3 above are real big hinderances for me in living the life that I want to live, so I worked on stopping.