[Resident Bipolar]

Possible trigger:

I haven't self-harmed severely for over a year. It's a great achievement. However, I miss my best friend more and more every day. He was always there for me and helped me through all of the toughest times in my life, for seven years.

Does anybody else get a physical itch on their arm when they badly crave self harm, in a location local to where you want to do so?

Every night when trying to sleep, without fail, I see videos on my head from when I used to self harm and I get goose bumps. And it makes me feel ill, actually.

[kaliope]

it has been 8 years for me and i can see it so clearly, the film rolls in my head.

Possible trigger:

last week i got a tattoo over my scars and i was just waiting for him to ask if it hurt too bad like i am used to them saying and i was going to respond how i am used to dragging razor blades over my skin so no, it felt so good. and i so much wanted to roll sideways so i could watch the blood well up, wanted it so bad, but i didnt want him to think i was a freak, you know.

[FallingTears]

Resident Bipolar
Just keep it to the videos... Don't be tempted...
I just spent half an hour with a box of matches convincing myself not to burn anymore of my forearms. (I need to see the damage constantly and my "clumsy in the kitchen" shtick seems to confuse even my youngest child..)
I picture where I can hurt myself at least a few times every hour.
Step away from the sharp objects!! Do anything u can to not want to resume!
Use the goosebumps and the ill feeling to remind u how awful self injury is!

Falling Tears

I know what you mean about the physical itch, I get that all the time too. Not just an itch, but I get a pain too.

A year is amazing, keep it up!

[Achy Turtle Armor]

Originally Posted by kaliope

it has been 8 years for me and i can see it so clearly, the film rolls in my head.

Possible trigger:

last week i got a tattoo over my scars and i was just waiting for him to ask if it hurt too bad like i am used to them saying and i was going to respond how i am used to dragging razor blades over my skin so no, it felt so good. and i so much wanted to roll sideways so i could watch the blood well up, wanted it so bad, but i didnt want him to think i was a freak, you know.

Possible trigger:

SI, enjoying SI

Not sure how to trigger this so I hope that helped...



I don't remember this with my other tattoos but when I was in the chair this weekend getting a couple it felt so good. Really good. I was so relaxed I started to get sleepy and doze off. It reminded me of the early days of SI for me when it really worked. I would get so calm, relaxed, and dopey feeling. I don't know how I feel about that but I will discuss it with my therapist.

[ladisputelover]

Possible trigger:

I know exactly what you're talking about! I still get that itch whenever I feel anxious or guilty or depressed or having a flashback. I hadn't self harmed in two years but I just relapsed two weeks ago and I hate myself for it.
But mostly I hate myself, not for relapsing, but for wanting to do it again.

ps idk if I did the trigger thing correctly