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#1
Dec 02, 2007, 09:03 PM
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about what the dr's going to say tomorrow. I wish i had an idea of how she's going to react. I wish i knew whether or not it will "come out" OK.
Part of me wants to tell her so badly, and another part of me wants to run in the opposite direction. She wouldn't be aloud to contact my parents right?? (I'm 19 btw...) She shouldn't be able to as i'm an adult, but i'm still scared that she might. I'm anxious just sitting her, so i can't imagine what tomorrow is going to be like. And to add a cherry on top tomorrow is my first exam (at 8:30 in the morning) and then they keep coming right up until next wednesday. I can't study right now. I can't do anything right now. And... i have a confession. I SI'ed tonight. I was trying so hard not to because i didn't want her to see fresh ones ... but everything is just too overwhelming. I wish i could just make this all disappear. 
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The unexamined life is not worth living. -Socrates |
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#2
Dec 02, 2007, 09:30 PM
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(((((((((((((((((( jacq )))))))))))))))))
 
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#3
Dec 02, 2007, 10:03 PM
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It must be so hard for you right now. Maybe if you try and explain your emotional pain right now she will understand. I am sorry that you couldn't find another way to cope but you are doing your best and that is all you can ask of yourself. I hope it goes well tomorrow.
BB
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#4
Dec 03, 2007, 01:26 AM
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Ohh boy.
Thanks for the support both of you. Tonight as been one heck of a night, and i can only hope that tomorrow will be better. Hugs to you both
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The unexamined life is not worth living. -Socrates |
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#5
Dec 03, 2007, 06:26 PM
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Sooooo I did it!
It wasn't nearly as bad as i'd anticipated! The waiting around for a bit beforehand was the worst part because my anxiety was through the roof, but once i sat down and started talking with her it started to go better. I didn't even have to bring up the SI. We were talking about why I wanted to go back on the AD's (which i didn't end up getting a prescription for anyhow - but thats OK) she asked me how i was feeling exactly, and then asked if i ever hurt myself intentionally etc etc, and all i had to do was nod. She then asked me some pretty generic questions, and then we kind of came up with an "intervention" that i can do (especially when i'm home for xmas) when i'm feeling the need to SI. She was really sweet, and gave me some suggested T's that she thinks I might like. I think i might look into that after xmas... But yeah, thanks for all your support and encouragement. I'm just glad that i got it over with, and hopefully i can move forward from here!
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The unexamined life is not worth living. -Socrates |
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#6
Dec 03, 2007, 06:40 PM
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(((((((((((((((( jacq )))))))))))))))
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#7
Dec 03, 2007, 10:37 PM
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Thanks ((((((((((Fuzzy)))))))))
I'm pretty happy about it  - or, as happy as you can be about something like this ..... 
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The unexamined life is not worth living. -Socrates |
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#8
Dec 03, 2007, 11:00 PM
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(((((((( jacq ))))))))
glad it went well for you..
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#9
Dec 04, 2007, 01:33 AM
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(((((((((Gabriel)))))))))
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The unexamined life is not worth living. -Socrates |
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#10
Dec 04, 2007, 01:38 PM
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Glad that it went well.
--splitimage
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 "I danced in the morning when the world was begun. I danced in the moon and the stars and the sun". From my favourite hymn. "If you see the wonder in a fairy tale, you can take the future even if you fail." Abba 
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#11
Dec 05, 2007, 01:37 AM
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(((((((((splitimage)))))))
__________________
The unexamined life is not worth living. -Socrates |
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