[helpless_mommy]

I am such a worthless loser. I had gone 65 days without cutting. 65 days, over two months, the longest I had gone in two and a half years. On day 66 I screwed up big time! I had to get 18 stiches on my wrist. My parents put me under house arrest (mind I'm 24). I'm not allowed to see my boyfriend. This sucks! And then I was so pissed off about all of that I cut again last night. These ones weren't bad; just scratches really. I'm so mad at myself. I spent most the day Saturday crying. When I wasn't crying I was sleeping. And Sunday I pretty much slept all day. AHHHHHHHHHHH I just want to quit!!!

[Cthomas]

Ok. so you did it. now we start fresh right? youre parents are worried about you. they probably dont know any other way to help you. but to keep you home. You are not a loser.
You are so nowhere even CLOSE to being a loser.

Ok so here is where I say i dont know about your parents but it sounds like they are trying right? (could be way off base here)

I hope you feel better soon. and maybe while on house arrest talk to them??? tell them why we do this? why it seems like a release? and tell them it is not a suicide attempt. maybe print up some info on SI?

Just an idea....take care. Feel better.

Colleen

[GoodMama]

<center>((((((((((((((Mommy))))))))))))</center>

Sweetie, you had a set back ... it's not the end of the world, thank God. It takes a lot of strength to come here with your story. Your friends will rally around you with lots of gentle hugs. You need to read what they say ... then read it again! ... because they will all tell you you're not worthless, that you're not alone, and that you don't deserve the pain you're feeling!

I'm still learning about SI but I know one thing. When you cut yourself, it's because the pain has gotten so bad that the urges win. It's an addiction, Mommy. You've already proven you're stronger than IT is because you went 65 days without SI.

So ... now you start counting again. Slowly. Stay away from SI for an hour ... even a minute ... and the days will start to pile up again. You're strong! You don't deserve this pain! You are loved! (((((((((((((Mommy))))))))))))

Sending lots and lots of gentle hugs your way. Stay strong ... read the "reasons not to SI" and the suggestions from your friends about what "to do instead of SI." Hang tough!

GoodMama

[jacq10]

((((((((((((Helpless_Mommy))))))))))

[Christina86]

((((((((((h_m)))))))))))))

You did a great job making it as far you did. You are not worthless, nor are you a loser in any way. It's a setback, one we don't want to take, but %#@&#! happens.

Try to take care of yourself, and start again. You can do it.

[bipolar_bear]

((((((((((((((((((((((helpless mommy))))))))))))))))))))))))))) You are no loser. You did wonderfully going 65 days. Maybe you can get your parents some information on SI so they can understand better? It sounds like they have your best interest at heart. Maybe now you can work at a little bit at a time to not SI. Please take care and stay safe.

BB

[helpless_mommy]

Well I cut again last night. But I did make it through my bf breaking up with me without cutting. As much as I really wanted to. So that has to be a good thing.
Well today is a new day; today is day one of no more cutting.

[Cthomas]

H_M

At least we are at day one. I am sorry about the b/f and the breakup. but some things are just not meant to be. that just means its his loss. and he will realize that at the worst point and tough for him. You deserve somebody to love you unconditionally as much as all of us do.

Im here. im having a rough time too. but together we can be stronger.

Thinking of you today,

Colleen

[bchlyn]

you are not a looser... i know that first hand... i know how hard the struggle is everyday... i keep a chart and put stars on it for the days i don't cut... then i can look at it and see that there are so many more days that i didn't... and it kind of puts things in perspective... i know how hard it is when you cut... and how exposed you feel when others find out what you did... you are so strong... i haven't made 60 days in a very long time... probably 2 years...lyn

[Cthomas]

Hey good idea lyn. I already created a obcessions chart. maybe one like you have too? i might try that....interesting.

thanks for the idea. it does help to put things into perspective when you are looking at them in black and white.

Take care all..
colleen

[mlpHolmes]

((((((((Cthomas))))))))))

Love your Positive attitude!! Not always easy.

[jacq10]

Awesome Winner

Thats more like it!

[Cthomas]

Thanks for the kudos mlpholmes and jacq.

working on it! with friends like you guys, its hard to stay down.

but we all have to keep plugging along. otherwise we get stale. not good....not good.

so keep up with the positive. at least thats todays forecast....LOL

me