SI and relationships

Ever since my ex came back into my life I've been really jealous if he spends time with others and often want to cut. I did do a little digging at my wrists, but no blood. I think it's my jealousy and paranoia that's doing it, but I can't be for sure because I keep thinking about my past relationships...all the bad ones and just want to crawl into a hole. To die? In a sense, but not literally.

I'm driving myself insane and I don't know how to stop. My insecurity is killing me. The urges are stronger and stronger each day. Somebody please help.

I wonder if either you are comparing this relationship to all the bad ones in the past and finding it to be more similar than you would have liked, or if you are upset about the time you spent in bad relationships in the past. Has he given you reason not to trust him? You just don't sound happy, and I don't know enough about you or your situation to put my finger on it. Is there something that you would like to be different about your life these days? I'm just getting that you need a change of some kind. What would you like to be doing with your life if there were no limitations? What goals are you working towards?

I know, you were writing about your relationship. How does that fit with your personal goals? It seems to me that your unhappiness has more to do with you than with him. I wish I knew how to help you. I just know that there is something. SI isn't the issue - it's an expression of your discomfort.

<font color=orange>"If a light beckons to you, follow it. If it leads you into the quagmire, you'll probably find your way out of it again; but if you don't follow it, you'll be plagued for the rest of your life by the thought that perhaps it was your star." Friedrich Hebbet</font color=orange>

I was wondering why he was your "ex". What happened previously in your relationship that caused it to break apart and could worries about that happening again be causing your discomfort?
Carrie

<font color=blue>If you have two dollars, spend one on bread and the other on flowers. The bread will feed your body and the flowers will feed your soul."--Arabic Saying

Well, to be honest, his family moved to another state. we were young...like 14. So I guess you could say the long distance thing was not in our best interest. Sometimes I think that fate brought him back to me.

We are trying to find out about each other again so that we may be able to be a couple again. If it works out, it works out, ya know.

I used to be extremely jealous of my husbands friends. At the time I wasn't getting what I needed out of the relationship. I was a young stay at home mom, completely isolated. It sucked big time, meanwhile he was going to work then going out with the guys after work then sleeping off the hang over. Sigh. It was hard. With time we have worked things out but it was difficult. It was neccessary for me to get what I needed from the relationship in order for me to not be jealous.

Are you getting what you need?
Carrie

<font color=blue>If you have two dollars, spend one on bread and the other on flowers. The bread will feed your body and the flowers will feed your soul."--Arabic Saying