[bchlyn]

i really want to cut... i really want to cut... i am trying to ride out the wave but i think it's a shorebraker...lyn

[Cthomas]

Nope!!!! You CAN do this lyn...

you can do this......cheerleader here!

You CAN DO THIS...you know my email use it! I am going to be in and out all day.
Colleen

[Christina86]

(((((((((((Lyn))))))))))))))))

Don't cut. Take a breath. Try to hold on for a minute, or 5 minutes, or an hour... and continue to try to make it to the next time 'point'. You can do this.

Talk to me ... send me a PM if you want to talk, okay?

Be safe. You can do this. Reach out for help, try to talk to your IRL support right now if you can.

[Kiya]

Lyn, call t ok???
((((((((((((lyn))))))))))))

[bchlyn]

i rode it out ... thank you for your help... i woke up at 3 in a panic attack and they didn't stop until i got home from work... i guess i am glad it was a short day... and we were at the park so i could play with the kids... you know i am a fairly intelligent women... i work with at risk kids... i know the truth... i know why i do this... i know it's not ok... but when i get to that place... of working from panic... and fear .... it doesn't matter... lyn

[Christina86]

(((((((((Lyn)))))))))) Panic attacks suck.

Our emotional self always seems to outweigh our rational/logical self... so I understand. Glad you made it through.

[Kiya]

yeah totally what Christina said! glad you could ride it out =) that takes guts - panic is really hard.
(((((((((((lyn)))))))))))))))

[bchlyn]

back in the wave... i am struggling again tonight... i hate this.

[bipolar_bear]

I hope you were able to ride it out last night. I know it is hard but you have been doing great.

BB

[bchlyn]

was able to go to sleep... i have to leave my tv on all night... but woke up in a panic attack again today... i can't keep on like this... i haven't cut....lyn

[bipolar_bear]

I often leave the tv on all night. If it helps maybe you can keep doing it. I am glad you have been able to stay safe. Thinking of you.

BB

[bchlyn]

trying ... i have a t appointment tonight... i am really scared ... to let him know how bad things are right now... but i guess at least i haven't cut... so i must be doing something right...lyn

[Christina86]

((((((((((((((((Lyn)))))))))))))))) Glad you made it through last night. I'm scared to talk to T sometimes too... but since they're paid to listen to us, I'd say go ahead.

Hope the appt goes well ... good job on not SIng!

[Kiya]

=(
(((((((((((((((((lyn))))))))))))))))))))))))

[bchlyn]

9.5 weeks... i made it past 8 weeks... the longest i have gone in the past 3 years is 12 weeks.

went to get in my car this morning and my window is smashed in... this is the 5th time since i filed the restraining order that one of our cars has been vandalized... the police officer at least seemed to be taking it seriously.... oh well such is "my" life. i need to move... i can't do this anymore.

lyn

[bipolar_bear]

(((((((((((((((((((((((((lyn)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) I am so sorry that things are so hard. I hope the police find out who is damaging your vehicles.

BB

[Fuzzybear]

[bchlyn]

we know who it is... i have a restraining order... for all it's worth... but unless someone sees him do it... we just have to put up with it... he is in and out of jail... so when he is in jail ... nothing happens... i checked with the sheriff's and surprise he is no longer in custody... at least he is staying away from me now... but when i went to court to get the restraining order he would stand by my car... i had to be escorted in and out of court... i had to change my cell phone 2 times... i think he was somehow getting it from the court paperwork... which i was told wouldn't happen...lyn

[Kiya]

Oh my gosh!!! ((((((((((lyn!!))))))))))))

[RozG]

(((((( lyn ))))))))

i'm sorry you're going thru this, i hope you manage to stay safe.