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#1
May 07, 2008, 01:46 PM
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i am just now realizing that didn't cut... yet i know i did... but there aren't any... it was a dream! I actually dreamt that i cut and now that i've been awake for an hour i can see that i didn't. and in fact it is 29 days today that i haven't.
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Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image.   alt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
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#2
May 07, 2008, 01:48 PM
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Good work Kiya-- that must have felt really weird! 29 days!!!! You are brave and I admire you. Good job.
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#3
May 07, 2008, 01:55 PM
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it's mostly the meds...don't give me too much credit. it was really weird. i totally thought i had cut, and thought nothing of it.... but finding out there were none.... like which one is the reality!
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Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image. alt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
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#4
May 07, 2008, 03:28 PM
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(((Kiya)))
Wow way to go 29 days!! I'm going on 4 days right now. I know how you feel I woke up this morning and I had this dream that one of the houses down my road was gone and they are working on demolishing it and then when we drove by this morning I was there. Very eerie yet odd. Stay strong Kiya!! Love ya!! Silver |
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#5
May 07, 2008, 03:35 PM
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yeah - the urges are still there but they are like gel coated with the meds. one of the parts did start to get into trouble when emptying the dish washer and pressed a knife to the arm to "see if it was numb" and it was... but the switch wasn't all the way and i got them to put the knife away.
those kinds of dreams really are eerie... you know, i forgot about the part picking up the knife until now ...that' probably where the dream came from. 4 days is a good start. we all have to start somewhere (((((((((((silver))))))))))))))
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Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image. alt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
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#6
May 07, 2008, 05:46 PM
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my inspirarion have been boosted by your story.........
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#7
May 07, 2008, 06:02 PM
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</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
eggshell said: my inspirarion have been boosted by your story......... </div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> ((((((((((((eggshell))))))))))))))) welcome to PC. looking forward to your posts kiya
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Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image. alt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
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#8
May 07, 2008, 06:41 PM
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Thats great Kyia thats its been 29 days... did u feel better about it the next morning when you woke up??
babyg xXx
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~ HEY! I run a site on mental health called The Manic Years. I'm looking for some brave souls to share their own personal encounters with mental health. Are you up for sharing your story? Please get in touch on themanicyears@gmail.com. Thank you  ~Follow my blog here; http://themanicyears.com Lola Olivia ~ 7/11/11 ~ my reason for breathing Bipolar Affective Disorder type 2 - (2013) 'Borderline traits' Dissociative episodes |
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#9
May 08, 2008, 10:46 PM
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hey kiya... how are you doing?
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lyn one could do worse then be a swinger of birches. ~robert frost~
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#10
May 08, 2008, 11:36 PM
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30 days as of today... for cutting.
daily i am biting through my mouth...like now. and crying daily. who knows, maybe i am "undamming" all the crap i've held in so long? how are you doing?
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Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image. alt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
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#11
May 09, 2008, 07:19 AM
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(((((((((((((((((lyn)))))))))))))))))))))) (((((((((((((((((((((((((Kiya)))))))))))))))))) Thinking about you.
BB
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#12
May 09, 2008, 06:11 PM
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my grand baby was born on wed morning and has been in NICU so things have been really emotional... i missed my t appointment so i couldn't tell him that i was in that really not ok place... she is coming home from the hospital today... it's been a real emotional roller coaster... i am sorry things are so hard for you right now...is there something i can do to help?...lyn
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lyn one could do worse then be a swinger of birches. ~robert frost~
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#13
May 09, 2008, 06:13 PM
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thank you bb...lyn
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lyn one could do worse then be a swinger of birches. ~robert frost~
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#14
May 09, 2008, 08:09 PM
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((((((((((((((bbear))))))))))))))))
((((((((((((((lyn))))))))))))))))))) and hugs to newborn and family. ach.... flashbacks abound by night, fears of finances by day and in between fall meds and 2 hour attempts to fall asleep. cest la vie?
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Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image. alt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
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#15
May 09, 2008, 10:27 PM
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((((((((((((((((((((((lyn)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) I am so glad the grandbaby is able to go home now. How scary to have her in the NICU. I hope you are able to see your t this next week. Maybe you can call as you are not in a good place?
BB
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#16
May 10, 2008, 01:05 PM
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((Kiya))
Your dream reminds me of when I quit smoking years ago. I used to dream about it regularly--like I was missing a friend. I hope you are safe. Peace 
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#17
May 10, 2008, 07:58 PM
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</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
MissCharlotte said: Your dream reminds me of when I quit smoking years ago. I used to dream about it regularly--like I was missing a friend. I hope you are safe. </div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> Huh! That is cruious. thanks for telling me that. yeah i am safe.... today is 31 days i have not cut. now days only the manic times seem to endanger me... or like yesterday when the destructives get named out of the blue. I do actually get phantom pains in my arm where i used to cut. it is kind of disconcerting.
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Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image. alt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
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#18
May 10, 2008, 08:02 PM
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31 days is great Kiya keep it up!
Thats really strange about the phantom pains in your arm, but seeing as SI is an addiction, its understandable.. Dont worry about it all, just try and keep up all the good work your doing and you'll get there in no time!  much love, babyg xXx
__________________
~ HEY! I run a site on mental health called The Manic Years. I'm looking for some brave souls to share their own personal encounters with mental health. Are you up for sharing your story? Please get in touch on themanicyears@gmail.com. Thank you ~Follow my blog here; http://themanicyears.com Lola Olivia ~ 7/11/11 ~ my reason for breathing Bipolar Affective Disorder type 2 - (2013) 'Borderline traits' Dissociative episodes |
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#19
May 22, 2008, 08:53 AM
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(((kiya))) how are you?
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lyn one could do worse then be a swinger of birches. ~robert frost~
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