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#1
Feb 09, 2009, 06:40 AM
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I have the urge to cut so bad... I have the urge to do more!
But, I did it... I made it happen. I used to have a favourite film... and there is a beautiful song in it. I love that song... it meant a lot to me too and I just listened to it. I burst into tears and I felt like my heart had been ripped out. I've never had so much emotion RIP through my body that sudden (well... not since a certain event). But I didn't stop listening... couldn't turn it off... I'm torturing... SUFFOCATING myself with thoughts and feelings. I just don't want to handle life anymore. I don't see a point. I'm sorry for being so negative. I have so many feelings, just hopping from one to the other in split seconds... ANGER, hatred, loss, love, emptiness, abandonment..... PAIN! I have it in my hand  and I don't want to put it downMy hearts racing
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Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser So thanks for making me a fighter Last edited by silver_moon; Feb 09, 2009 at 06:52 AM. |
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#2
Feb 09, 2009, 06:59 AM
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Can't think
Can't see Can't do anything... don't feel like I'm gere.. feel surrounded by thick fog shaking pins and needles everywhere... blood rush? dunno
__________________
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser So thanks for making me a fighter |
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#3
Feb 09, 2009, 07:47 AM
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(((((((((((( silver moon )))))))))))
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That's why it's such a serious thing to ask a Centaur to stay for the weekend. A very serious thing indeed. - The Silver Chair |
 silver_moon
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#4
Feb 09, 2009, 08:31 AM
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(((silver moon)))
 rap 
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 "You shall hear the truth in respect to the prisoner Rappaccini, and his poisonous daughter." -N. Hawthorne "Be slow to fall into friendship; but when thou art in, continue firm and constant." - Socrates |
| silver_moon
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#5
Feb 09, 2009, 06:26 PM
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please dont hurt yourself silvermoon - do anything - take a long shower - hit a pillow - throw things - let the emotions out! cry it all out - it will passs - ii WILL get better - you CAN SURVIVE this - we are here with you - holding your hands and wishing you well P7
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Its not how many times you fall down that counts  its how many times you get back up!   (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture  )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
| silver_moon
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#6
Feb 10, 2009, 08:08 AM
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Thanks for sharing this - I have been feeling really overwhelmed also and thoughts keep racing around. For what it's worth, I'm happy that I am not alone but I do feel bad that you are in so much angst.
Given your post, I don't know if you decided to SI but if you did please don't beat yourself up for it.  It does not mean anything other than you decided to cut. You are not "bad" and if you decided not to then you made another choice.Either way I hope that you are talking to someone about this. About the extreme feelings that you are experiencing. This is not something you have to go through alone, we are here to support you on the board but please let some of the people in your life know what is going on. |
| silver_moon
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#7
Feb 10, 2009, 08:30 AM
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Thank you all.... I'm fighting the urges so far
((((((all))))))) I know I can get through this without it, sometimes just seems so much harder? ((((((((doggybonz)))))))))))
__________________
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser So thanks for making me a fighter |
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