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#1
Feb 08, 2005, 04:07 PM
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You'd think I'd have learned my lesson on cutting when I had to go last week and get stapled back together but the urge is really strong today and the only thing that is keeping me safe is the fact I'm at my parents house. I talked to my friend Susan this morning and showed her my staples she said Jan you have got to stop this one day you will go to deep and regret the outcome. The question is will I regret it? I'm thinking nope but don't want to tell anyone in 3D about it because I'm so scared of going back into the hospital. I see my GP in the morning so maybe talking to him will help he has a good level head on his shoulders and usually has some sound advice for me.
Janniebug
__________________
I appreciate long walks especially when taken by people who annoy me. Noel Coward |
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#2
Feb 08, 2005, 04:17 PM
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((((((((((Janniebug)))))))))))
I don't know what to say. I wish I had the magic words, but I don't. I would take it all away from us all and throw it far away forever. I am feeling much the same but you've got to understand there are people who care for you and your 3d friend seems awesome, a great support for you. You're very lucky. Please do what you must to keep yourself safe girl. Talk to your GP and let him know what's going on. Come back here and talk to us and let us know how you're feeling. If you think it's too much for everyone else to hear pm me and say don't read this and just get it all out. Just share it with someone because I do care about what happens to you and I do want you to be safe. Take care of yourself, above all. Many blessings dear, Kimberly. |
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#3
Feb 08, 2005, 05:41 PM
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*hugs* be safe darling!!
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#4
Feb 08, 2005, 05:51 PM
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((((((Janniebug))))))))))
Take care of you
__________________
 Soon I'll grow up and I won't even flinch at your name ~Alanis Morissette |
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#5
Feb 08, 2005, 07:04 PM
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((((((((janniebug)))))))
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#6
Feb 08, 2005, 11:11 PM
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Jan...are you alright?????
stay safe and thinking of you tonight friend. Kimberly. |
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#7
Feb 11, 2005, 01:15 PM
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I did it again last night.....fyi if you cut on your wrist don't wear a watch the next day it hurts. I wish I was strong enough to throw away my razors but right now not even having them in the same room with me throws me into a tailspin so I can't see me throwing them away anytime soon. I want to be able to take them to my therapist and have him throw them away for me but I'm scared I will stop on the way home and buy more. I try to get by with saying how am I going to shave my legs but these razors aren't the shaving your leg type. I guess I'll just have to suck it up and throw them away but just the thought scares the bejezzus out of me.
Janniebug
__________________
I appreciate long walks especially when taken by people who annoy me. Noel Coward |
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#8
Feb 14, 2005, 07:39 PM
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Mega big hugs Jannie... if wanted. I to have had to put myself back together. Very humbling experience. Don't let it get you down. What was the outcome of the doc appointment? Keep us posted and take care of yourself.
Ryan |
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#9
Feb 14, 2005, 11:33 PM
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(((((((((((((((Janniebug)))))))))))))))))))))))
How are you dear????? |
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#10
Feb 15, 2005, 03:31 PM
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Well it has been a couple of days and I haven't cut. But last night in addition to my normal meds I took 12 sudafed and a whole bottle of Nyquil. That stuff was nasty but I drank it anyway then got pissed off this morning when I woke up. Anyway since we aren't supposed to post about suicidal things I'll tell you about my appt with my GP. He looked at my arm and said he thought the staples could come out as planned and they did on Thursday after waiting for 1 1/2 hours in the waiting room at the ER but anyway....he said he and his wife (my friend Susan) were very concerned about me and that some of what I'm going through I can control and some I can't and that I need to learn which is which. He gave me a hug and then sent me off for my EKG and bloodwork. Dr.Byrum is awesome and I respect him a lot. I talked to him again Sunday night because things were getting overwhelming again so I talked to him. He has such a good head on his shoulders. I saw my pdoc on Friday and he upped my Prozac to 80mg from 60 and I see him again on Thursday so hopefully I will be feeling better by then and not have to go anywhere.
Janniebug
__________________
I appreciate long walks especially when taken by people who annoy me. Noel Coward |
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#11
Feb 15, 2005, 04:44 PM
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((((((((((Janniebug)))))))))))
I hope the 80 mg will help you darling. I know you must be feeling very frustrated and out of control right now. I'm wishing you good luck that things start to improve for you soon. ****extra special hugs******* Stay safe, Kimberly. |
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#12
Feb 15, 2005, 06:23 PM
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*Hugs* I hope it helps please make sure to talk to us whenever you feel the need!
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#13
Feb 15, 2005, 07:10 PM
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((((((((Jannie))))))))))
People care about you. We care, and so does your doctor and his wife. Your parents care too. Please take care of yourself. I know it's easier to care about other people than about yourself, but if you have to start being good to yourself for the sake of the other people who don't want to lose you, then that's a place to start. I'm glad that you woke up. Rap
__________________
“We should always pray for help, but we should always listen for inspiration and impression to proceed in ways different from those we may have thought of.” – John H. Groberg 
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#14
Feb 15, 2005, 07:16 PM
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((((((((((((((((((((jannie))))))))))))))))))))
__________________
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#15
Feb 15, 2005, 08:26 PM
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((((((((((((jannie)))))))))))
__________________
 Take time for you. |
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#16
Feb 15, 2005, 09:17 PM
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Thanks for the hugs guys. I really need all the prayer and support I can get right now as I'm not telling to many people in 3D what's going on. It took a lot for me to tell Dr.Byrum and his wife but I know that they care and that if need be he will force me to go to the hospital.
Janniebug
__________________
I appreciate long walks especially when taken by people who annoy me. Noel Coward |
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#17
Feb 16, 2005, 07:41 AM
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(((((((((jannie)))))))))
__________________
That's why it's such a serious thing to ask a Centaur to stay for the weekend. A very serious thing indeed. - The Silver Chair |
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#18
Feb 16, 2005, 09:07 AM
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(((((((((jannie)))))))))
__________________
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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