feeling very anxious

Last night I was with my husband.

He was so accepting of me!

Esp. a part of my sexuality that I have always rejected.

for a moment, I was able to accept it, too.

But today, I am back to rejecting it.

Because i woke up today with a vaginal itch.

I was able to take care of it with a vinegar douche, but I was struggling with anxiety about being bad again and was afraid that the itch was a supernatural being punishing me for sex last night and my husband accepting me and this part of me that i've rejected and still reject this minute.

I am sure ppl can relate to hangups around sex, pleasure, love, and religion.

Thank you.

B.

My mom once told me that there was a book out in the 70s called "Sex Without Guilt", and that my Nana could have written "Guilt Without Sex"...

During puberty, when our ideas of sex are formed, we are told "DO NOT DO NOT DO NOT!!!!". Is it any wonder why our society is so obessed with sex, yet people feel guilty about having it?

Hon, you are married. What ever higher power you believe in has no problem with you having sex with your husband. Have you seen anyone about this? A gynocologist? Or a therapist? What you do with your husband is a natural and loving demonstration of what you feel for him. You don't need to feel guilty about it! I understand that you do, but change the tape in your head and tell yourself it is ok!

And don't do that vinegar douche too often...infrequently, it might be okay, but not a good idea, otherwise. Douching in general is very bad.

I agree with theotterone - just relax and enjoy this special time with your husband. The more enjoyable the better.

I also agree with Maven and would even go further and say douching is not good for you at all. It upsets the natural PH balance and can cause MORE problems. Your body will take care of itself internally - all you need to do is wash with mild soap and water externally. Even taking baths can also cause problems especially if the person is using bath oils or perfumy additions. I also recommend all women eat yogurt OR take a probiotic supplememnt - this friendly natural bacteria is excellent for the vagina. Any other problems should be addressed by your doctor.

What you are experiencing is a little natural dryness, understandible if you are not usually sexually active. It will go away with time. Some of the OTC vaginal itch products can help but don't overdo it.

I also recently heard on Dr. Oz (new show) that sauerkraut and kimchi (don't know if I spelled that last one right) both also contain bacteria that is good for you.

Another thing I believe worth mentioning is the possibility of your husband's penis being part of the problem. If he just came home from a 4 day camping trip without a shower, I'd say "hold on, Buster! Get thee to a shower, lather up and make sure you rinse that thing really well!!"

If your husband happens to be uncircumcised, a refresher course on proper/marital hygiene might be in order. It's really important for both of you (especially you), that he routinely moves the skin away from the head of the penis as part of his normal bathing.

That area of an uncircumcised penis is a perfect delivery system for any bacteria to be introduced deep inside the vagina. Maybe he needs a "personalized" refresher course with his lovely wife???

Just a thought, good luck.

^^^
Good points Notz - I agree it's best if you both wash before having sex. Also since you're newly married you may be having sex more which could be irritating the vaginal area(honeymoon syndrome) which is why you should use non-irritating lubricants if neceassary. Best of luck.

I agree with the above responders re cleanliness issues, esp for the uncircumsized. Otherwise, girl, you are a married woman having sexual relations with her husband, the purpose for which God reportedly created us. No reason fo feel guilty here. Itches just happen for physical reasons. They are not punishments. God doesn't punish us this way, and I doubt if he punishes us at all in this life. We do that ourselves. billieJ