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  #51  
Old May 13, 2011, 07:41 AM
Christiane Christiane is offline
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Member Since: May 2011
Location: FL
Posts: 9
I empathize with you and, while my situation was a bit different, I know the fear you are feeling. And in our society where over-sexed and surgically-enhanced women flood all forms of social media, that fear is reinforced pretty much all day long.

You said: "I'm feeling absolutely self conscious and I don't even want to have sex with my fiance because I'm ashamed of my breasts. They went from AMAZING and FULL to almost non-existent. I feel like along with the weight loss went my breasts and my womanhood. I don't even feel like a woman anymore."

He's your fiance, so I'm hoping you'll be comfortable enough with him to try this. But your feelings ARE valid because they are yours and because they are affecting you, so be candid with with him! Tell him your fears as exactly as you posted them here. Tell him you'll probably need to be reassured many times before you adjust to this major change in your life, and ask him for his support for this repeated reassurance. If he doesn't already know your feelings, this might bring him great relief (knowing clearly why you don't want to have sex with him lately)! He might be blaming himself, or wondering what he did wrong, you know? It took me years to believe that my now-husband actually prefers small-breasted women! But he doesn't mind reminding me, even now after many years, because it will usually cause me to give him some warm affection whenever he does.

The guy proposed to you. He wants to be with you through the good and the bad in life. Tell him what you need and let him be your hero. I bet it will make him happy to do it! Let us know if you have success with him!!

PS: Frederick's of Hollywood makes underwire bras and outfits that leave most of the breast exposed, while still providing support to make you look bigger and perkier. When I'm feeling particularly down on myself because of my boobs, those help me to feel sexy so I can act sexy. I hope that helps!
Thanks for this!
pachyderm

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  #52  
Old May 13, 2011, 10:32 AM
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Aunt Donna Aunt Donna is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2008
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 1,709
My mother became concerned about her breast size when she lost weight, not because of men but because she looked flat. My 21 year and 13 year old nieces introduced their grandmother to the padded uplifting bra. My mother loves them (her granddaughters and the bras).
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He is still working me to make me what I ought to be... and does He have a job.
Aunt Donna formerly faylowell
Are breasts really that important?
Are breasts really that important?
  #53  
Old Oct 28, 2011, 11:52 AM
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ChipmunkGal ChipmunkGal is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2009
Posts: 73
I'm still struggling with this issue. :'(
  #54  
Old Oct 28, 2011, 12:52 PM
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Justme_55 Justme_55 is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2011
Posts: 224
Congrats on the weight loss!!! Boobs are just boobs; when we are 80 they will all "hang the same way.. Down! Lol; Ive always been on the smaller side; I was hoping after having my son and going from a medium b to a small c that they stay at a c; nope still a b. We are made differently for a reason; I hope you can love the new you; I know when mine are going to hang low I'll wish for my 20 something's again. =)
  #55  
Old Nov 03, 2011, 10:10 PM
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CantExplain CantExplain is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2011
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 19,616
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChipmunkGal View Post
have any words of wisdom, honest thoughts or advice?
Here's an honest thought.

My wife's breasts are very important to me. But her happiness is even more important.

Does that help?
Thanks for this!
ChipmunkGal
  #56  
Old Nov 07, 2011, 01:55 PM
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nicko9000 nicko9000 is offline
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Member Since: May 2011
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 23
Your breasts certainly aren't a problem, and if your man doesn't want you as much simply because they are small, he's not a man worth keeping. Us humans come in all different shapes and sizes, and there is not a single thing wrong with any one of us. Short, fat, thin, big bum, small bum, big head, small head. I feel the self consciousness with most people today is because of the amount of attention the media gives to your image. You see style and fashion magazines all over the place, all presenting this 'perfect' size 0, large breasted, makeup smothered woman, and a man with a rippling six pack and 12 inch penis. Men worry about the size of their manlihood as much as women worry about the size of their breasts.

If your boyfriend was so bothered about your breasts, would he be with you? I'm almost positive he either doesn't care, or he adores them. I certainly wouldn't refuse intimacy with a woman because her breasts were small. And I doubt he would either
Thanks for this!
ChipmunkGal
  #57  
Old Nov 14, 2012, 11:13 PM
hamster-bamster hamster-bamster is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2011
Location: Northern California
Posts: 14,805
OK, so I inquired which topic has the most views on this forum and it is this one, about breasts. If that is the case, then why do people not answer my question? Should I post within this thread to be answered? I will.

I had perfect breasts (both perfect shape and on the larger side but not too large) and all guys, young and old, were completely crazy about them.

enter age, detrimental weight fluctuations and very long term breastfeeding, and I do not have perfect breasts anymore. They are OK, but not perfect.

I have a new guy who is able to come twice in one session and wants to see me almost every day. 12 years ago he asked me how my then husband, who is 12 years my senior, was able to get such a beautiful young girl. I thought that it was a theoretical question - the guy himself was married to an age peer and wondered how relationships across ages work. Frankly I did not know what to answer and 12 years is not a lot for me because I have had many men older than my parents. But at any rate I thought it was a theoretical inquiry. Then last week as soon as he found out that I was available he shows up at my door asking me what I am looking for in a partner. I am healing from an extremely difficult divorce and all I am looking for is not to be humiliated, which is what I said. He clearly thought that he can pull it off and next day we had sex. So the question 12 years ago was not a theoretical one.

While all this seems fine, he does not play with my breasts and I do not like that. I see that he is clearly excited about me in general, but... no attention to my breasts at all.

I do not know how to behave: should I ask him for breast play thinking that my breasts are probably simply not attractive enough for him? I do not want to burden him or make him do something he does not want to do. But I do want breast play. I like how my nipples get erect from breast play and all that. So I wonder what other people do as I am sure this is a common enough situation.

Thank you!

Last edited by hamster-bamster; Nov 14, 2012 at 11:36 PM.
  #58  
Old Nov 20, 2012, 03:38 AM
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Sam2 Sam2 is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2012
Location: midwest
Posts: 656
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elysium View Post
LOL, Jess Petty!!

Are you a guy? Because if you are then you do have boobs...you just have Man-Boobs!!
I believe the term is gynnecomastia. I realize this is an open forum, and freedom of thoughts and ideas makes it work, but with those freedoms, there needs to be some compassion. I don't know if the last poster was a man or not, but if so, having overdeveloped breast tissue may be something that has caused the individual ridicule or emotional discomfort. I'm sure women have body differences that cause them the same discomfort.

I realize I am new here, and tone of voice can't be interpreted through the written word, so understand that this is not a lecture. Just a gentle reminder to respect what may be painful feelings in someone else. It goes both ways.

Sam2
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attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




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