Masturbation and anxiety

I have a tendency to masturbate when I am anxious. It is a quick source of stress relief. The problem is that I do it more often (2-3xs/week) than I would like and I often feel guilty after I do it (I'm married). Plus it's often not physically satisfying and I feel like a loser after I do it. I am under a lot of stress (currently unemployed) and often home alone, so I find it difficult not give in to the urge. I wish I could have more control over this urge. Part of me says don't get hung up about this. Another part says it doesn't help my self-esteem, so I should control it. This is the first time I have ever admitted this publicly.

Personally, I never thought there was a problem in masterbating.

It's a naturaly urge to go for it....so, why condone yourself for attending to something so natural? Maybe you're putting too much unnecessary pressure upon yourself?

Shangrala

What you are going through is normal for a lot of people when they masturbate with out knowing how they really feel about it.... I suggest that you ask your self why you are feeling guilty and if the reason is due to religion or the opinion of another then I say let your self off the hook and enjoy... I did.

It is a normal biological process. There is nothing wrong with it as long as it doesn't seriously affect your life in some way. There should be no shame with an occasional satisfying of a natural part of the human function.

I personally do this too. I find it does help stress but, like you find myself feeling guilty. I notice that, if I masturbate with my girlfriend present or even on the phone with her I do not feel guilty. Thus my reason for guilt is because I feel it is being selfish and is kinda like I'm cheating on her. That could just be me but you sound like you may feel similar.

I personally don't see the problem with it; if it eases the anxiety, you've found a way to ease anxiety that does not violate anyone, that doesn't harm anyone, etc.
I also use it to release tension and never thought of it in a negative light. Thank God for a way to relieve tension.
The guilt is something you may want to explore and hopefully come to a place of acceptance.
If there are religious concerns, maybe that's an area to be explored as well, with a healthy religious advisor.
If I am hungry I eat, if I am tired I sleep, if I am anxious I do what it takes to relieve the anxiety.

Masturbation is normal and healthy. It's not cheating on your partner for you to touch your own body. Unless you avoid sex with your partner and only masturbate, it shouldn't be a problem.

I agree with all the other posters. This would only be a problem if you weren't satisfying your wife and instead prefer to masturbate or if you're addicted to it - which you aren't. If you are just supplementing or using it for stress relief - no need to feel bad about yourself or guilty. Masturbation is a normal healthy part of human sexuality. Did you know that fetuses in the womb, touch themselves? It's normal for children to touch themselves. What message were you given as a child? - perhaps this is why you have bad feelings attached to it. Don't feel bad anymore, so long as you're pleasing your wife and only using it to supplement and as a stress reliever. You're entitled to explore your own body and feel good about it.

It can be an addiction as well. I have noticed with my recent masturbation it has lead me to pursue internet dating and finding other people, to experience intimacy with. I am not married, but I have been isolated for a long time and so maybe that is why God made us have this biological function but at the same time it must be controlled, but it shouldn't be a problem for you, especially if you are married and she is understanding or doesn't feel unattractive because of it. It's something you need to do. The religious and saintly side is to be chaste, and I have tried that too, but it makes you numb. I think it is healthier just to let it be as it is.

Naturally anything that becomes an addiction is a problem. I don't think this poster's addicted at all. I think it a normal heathy thing to do. I think chastity is for people who have decided to wait for marriage. I don't think it applies to masturbation. In fact a person can use masturbation to abstane from sex if they want to wait for marriage. As long as it doesn't interfere with normal sex with a partner or become an addiction - it's normal to do it.

Okay, I don't normally go into detail about this kind of thing online. I am a very private person in regards to this kind of intimacy, but for the sake of trying to clarify what I feel about the process. Being sexually intimate with my wife is a process about her and I. Since, I tend to be concerned about her more then myself and making sure her needs are met. That she knows I find her beautiful and that I want her to feel wanted and to make sure it is a satisfying experience for her the act becomes more about her then myself. She doesn't make it that way I do. I chose to validate her when we are intimate so there is a degree of psychological disconnect there due to my making sure she is feeling good about our... well you know. Then you add the fact that my medication and I am not the kid I used to be make it hard for me to... well you know. I have no resentment about any of this. I want my wife to know she is just as important in our intimacy as I am and she has never been validated that way in past relationships. So occasionally when I need to, I take time to make it about me. I don't do it it often because I find that it makes it harder to finish when I am with my wife but sometimes I need to take the time to myself and tend to needs that i don't quite get met in my wife and I's intimacy. So now that I have shared one of the most intimate parts of who I am for the sake of showing that it can be a good thing let's (that is to say with me about this in the future please) not talk about this anymore lol..... How about that Super Bowl coming up? Go football!!!

LOL I agree Ascension.

I feel for you man. I am single but have a loving girlfriend (long distance relationship.) What frustrates me is I try to masturbate and can not ejaculate even thinking about the hotest, sexiest woman alive. It's ********! Peace, Allen