Any one else like this

I read that Julia Child was a 41 y/o virgin when she met her to-be husband. You can't see what is around the corner in life.

Are you doing anything to try to meet people? I went out with a singles group for a bit. They had dances once a month but I don't dance so I didn't do that but I did enjoy when we ate at restaurants and went to a bar with a live band.

Or join a club relative to your interests, photography or whatever.

Don't worry my friend, I have almost the same issue as you, even though for me I do grow up with a family that have no trouble of showing physical closeness to anyone, and yet I'm still quite very similar as you, I could hardly bound to anyone, I do have a trust issue to others even with my self and my family too, and for me to have a partner/ husband is a huge deal for me since to do that, I will felt like I'll lost my freedom, I'll become a burden to my partner or something too as well....I just cannot see commitment as a golden gate for me is more like a dark gate for me....and yeah I end up being what I'm now, 30 years old virgin, if it is making you feels better I'm alone but at least we are alone together

sugahorse, sa=sexual abuse, actually it was childhood s/a.

thank you everyone for the replies. they were helpful. im not much of a social person. and dont think i would go to any groups. although this sounds like im not trying its not that. i agree that i will have to work through some issues before doing anything about this.

@meat - Again I did not mean to sound like I got on my soapbox. Your point is well taken regardless.

Ironically though study after study shows that when people are treated in private or answer questions anonymously the fact is overwhelmingly clear. That the so called old fashioned view is desired and that people regret not keeping sex for a committed marriage.

I guess this is why I sound so strong about it. People will state publicly an "open", liberal, or intellectual view of sex but the fact is when the moment of truth hits them in therapy or in a anonymous survey the view is totally different.

The blind studies and clinical studies are out there. But the reality is there is more to the issue than just when to have sex.

Again let me emphasize to everyone I am just sharing what I have come to know and I do not think any less or more of others opinions or conclusions. To me the forum is about sharing experience and challenges.