Should I stay straight because someone in my family don't like me being bisexual?

I told my brother I'm bisexual because I was in on a website and I was going to put bisexual as who I like. I know it was wrong but oh well. When I told him it was like he didn't want me to be a bisexual and it was like he was disgusted. I might as well tell my family... He even told me I'm a pervert because I'm a bisexual. How does liking girls make me a pervert? :'( Should I just stay straight? Please don't tell me off I feel kind of sad and bad now

This tugs at my heart to hear you're so conflicted. Don't shirk me off but I really must say you are still young yet (I know, 18 is rather adult isn't it?) Your body's hormones have not yet settled and this nearly always adds to any angst.

Plus, in your profile you state you suffer with anxiety and depression. Either or both of those disorders add to this conflict within you, imo.

It's okay to like both sexes. Having an intense, intimate relationship with anyone is always a choice. You don't have to make that choice yet...and I would caution against it.

You aren't happy with going in that direction, it seems to me from your post that not only aren't you happy with it, but it's troubling your brother as well. Try to get beyond the "irk" value with your brother and sit and truly discuss your feelings and why you think this decision is being made. The way you were brought up, the values and beliefs, have a stronghold on us which is all but "inborn" and not easy to overcome, if that is what you think you need to do. You would need to address the why of all of it, to make a good decision for you, imo.

Be well.

Hey sweety, I'm sorry you're so sad.

I was "bisexual" from my late teens, but I did "grow out" of it. Not to say it's always the case, just that, as the previous poster says... hormones are up in the air at your age.

And your brother shouldn't make you feel bad. It's not his feelings after all.

So, even though, based on my experience of homosexual love I'd say "be careful!", that's just my opinion. Personally, I don't think it's healthy. Sorry if this offends anyone.

But whatever I say, whatever anyone says, please don't ever do anything because you think it's the only way others will love you.

You are you, and you need to look after yourself. And I know you live in the US, and you've got the Christian right to contend with, and all their agenda, but let me just say... God loves you.

Thanks for your advice I live in England by the way...

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being bi.

I am bi myself, it has not made me into a pervert, I am quite happily in a 3.5 year relationship with my partner (we just recently moved in together! ) My partner is also bi. No we don't cheat on each other, and neither of us are 'slutty' or 'can't choose between one sex or the other'.

Why do I have to say this? Because so many people don't get it, and buy into all kinds of ridiculous ideas about what people are like. When I came out to my mother, she thought I meant that I had to always be with both a guy and a girl at the same time!

Bottom line, being bi just means you have the potential to be attracted to guys or girls, in the same way that a straight or gay person only has the potential to be attracted to one or the other. You may have a preference of one over the other, you may not.

Don't let your brother's misconceptions about bi people influence you because that's all they are - misconceptions. I've had fulfilling relationships with both guys and girls - you can too. Ultimately, follow your own heart, wherever it may lead you. Good luck

Thank you for your reply

This is an awesome post. Just be yourself honey, and know that you're good enough.

Thank you for your reply

There is nothing wrong in your being attracted to both men and women, nor in experiencing different kinds of relationship and finding what feels right for you.

There is much more acceptance of gay men and lesbians than a few decades ago, but many people still do not understand and react according to stereotyped ideas about what it is to be lesbian or bisexual. If you want to identify yourself as bisexual, you must be prepared for some negative reactions, like your brother's. The upside is that it will open the door to relationships with others who feel the same as you.

Life is all too short, and youth even shorter. Enjoy your sexuality, live your life to the max and never be ashamed of who you are. It takes courage at times, but it is better to experience life fully than be constrained by the opinions of others and look back with regret on missed opportunities.
You will have better and stronger relationships by being who you are than by pretending to be who you are not. Good luck Happycheeks

happycheeks
Some people use word "pervert" too easy, that's all. Essentially it means something outside of that person's definition of what is "ok" for sex. Gee, not too long ago in some places there were people who would consider anyone who'd allow woman on top to be a pervert.

There are is various degrees of attraction. I am straight, BUT I am also attracted to women, just not sexually. Several times in my life I have fallen in love with women, it was quite real, sweet and quite platonic. It doesn't have to be all or nothing.

Go easy on yourself. Don't worry too much about labeling yourself this way or that and then trying to conform to that label. Meet people, have real friendships and relationships, and then worry how to describe it.

Um,you are who you are and you are beautiful because of it. If people are disgusted with you, remember it is their problem, not yours. Be what you feel you are ok?

Thanks for your advice