[Anthony_010101]

First of all, I would like to introduce myself first. I am Anthony_010101. I registered here because I would like to hear the very intelligent point-of-views or answers of you guys about my question.

What do you call to this psychological problem (?): A one person gets sexually attracted to a certain person of the same sex as him; yet at the same he want to be look like him.

Example:
I am Anthony, a 16 year old guy and I idolize Louis, a 28 year old actor. In this case, Louis may be characterized as an handsome and a hunk.

I really like Louis, even sexually aroused when I see him. But at the same time I idolize him to the point that I would like to be as handsome as him.

What does this scenario mean? Is the homosexuality of the teen, Anthony, is still in question? I mean he has still doubt about his sexuality.

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by Anthony_010101

First of all, I would like to introduce myself first. I am Anthony_010101. I registered here because I would like to hear the very intelligent point-of-views or answers of you guys about my question.

What do you call to this psychological problem (?): A one person gets sexually attracted to a certain person of the same sex as him; yet at the same he want to be look like him.

Example:
I am Anthony, a 16 year old guy and I idolize Louis, a 28 year old actor. In this case, Louis may be characterized as an handsome and a hunk.

I really like Louis, even sexually aroused when I see him. But at the same time I idolize him to the point that I would like to be as handsome as him.

What does this scenario mean? Is the homosexuality of the teen, Anthony, is still in question? I mean he has still doubt about his sexuality.

I can tell you that being sexually attracted to an actor is not a necessary condition for determining one's sexual orientation. Say, I am clearly straight and have never been sexually attracted to any male actor.

I do not know whether being sexually attracted to an actor of the same sex is a sufficient condition to say that you are homosexual, but I do know that it is not necessary.

Wanting to be as handsome as somebody does not seem to have any relationship to the issue of sexual orientation.

While I personally have always been straight, since way before puberty, I have read a lot about people who do not figure out their orientation until much later in life. In other words, you do not have a deadline.

[Anthony_010101]

Originally Posted by hamster-bamster

I can tell you that being sexually attracted to an actor is not a necessary condition for determining one's sexual orientation. Say, I am clearly straight and have never been sexually attracted to any male actor.

I do not know whether being sexually attracted to an actor of the same sex is a sufficient condition to say that you are homosexual, but I do know that it is not necessary.

Wanting to be as handsome as somebody does not seem to have any relationship to the issue of sexual orientation.

While I personally have always been straight, since way before puberty, I have read a lot about people who do not figure out their orientation until much later in life. In other words, you do not have a deadline.

Let's assume Anthony classified himself that he is a homosexual, not only he is sexually aroused to Louis but also he fantasize him, Louis.

Look at the bold part, that's my question. I know there may be no relationship between that. So is it normal and healthy that Louis would become the sexual object and at the same role model to Anthony?

I know it is okay for Anthony to want to be handsome though he is homosexual for there may be some motives for that.

Thanks!

[hamster-bamster]

I think that it is normal and healthy. I am not the best person to opine, though, since I am not homosexual. But all of that, coupled with your tender age, sounds completely normal to me and no cause for concern.

That I am sure of - no cause for concern. It might not give you enough information to determine your orientation with certainty, but it clearly is no cause for concern!!

Hi Anthony I think you are over-thinking this... making it more complicated than it is.

[Anthony_010101]

Thanks both of you.

Sorry if I am over-complicating this.

Do you think that the homosexuality of 'Anthony' would be more intense, I mean the sexual love for his own sex, because Louis is his idol and at the same time his sexual object.

I mean of course, Anthony will think and think about Louis and by that thinking, he would develop into more serious sexual feelings for Louis.

Sorry for this question. I am just wondering.

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by Anthony_010101

Thanks both of you.

Sorry if I am over-complicating this.

Do you think that the homosexuality of 'Anthony' would be more intense, I mean the sexual love for his own sex, because Louis is his idol and at the same time his sexual object.

I mean of course, Anthony will think and think about Louis and by that thinking, he would develop into more serious sexual feelings for Louis.

Sorry for this question. I am just wondering.

George's post above has answered this question, preemptively.

[THE16THDOCTOR]

I agree w hamster. Being attracted to an actor doesn't determine ones sexuality. Is Anthony attracted to other men or just one. Attracted to girls at all?

[onionknight]

It is definitely true that being attracted to one person (actor or person you know personally) of the same sex doesn't solely determine your sexuality. But also, it is important not to undermine the role that actor/actresses can have in helping us understand our sexuality. I'm a lesbian; I have a long history of admiring women on television.

[hamster-bamster]

I am so glad the post has been moved on here. I hope you will get responses.

When you originally posted, you chose

http://forums.psychcentral.com/other-mental-health-discussion/274528-homosexuality-role-model.html

homosexuality is not a mental health issue

homosexuality is a version of normalcy - a minority orientation.

So not only will you relevant traffic here, but the post belongs here because the forum is on "sexual issues", which is a neutral/non-patholigizing term.

[Anthony_010101]

Okay, sorry if I posted it in mental health.... I have posted it there because it says 'other topics not fitted to any forum' but sadly there is sexual and gender forum. sorry about that.

okay, i think the issue is now resolved for now and i think i am just over thinking this !

[wistful]

I beg to differ. Homosexuality is a mental health issue. It's an outward expression of an issue in your subconscious that will be found after discussion in therapy.

[Anthony_010101]

at wistful, how can you say homosexuality is a disease? What are the causes?

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by wistful

I beg to differ. Homosexuality is a mental health issue. It's an outward expression of an issue in your subconscious that will be found after discussion in therapy.

We clearly need more freudian crap on here, so I am glad that at least somebody will advise both Anthony and other impressionable youths properly.

[wistful]

Originally Posted by Anthony_010101

at wistful, how can you say homosexuality is a disease? What are the causes?

I didn't say it was a disease. Based on what I learned, homosexuality has been found to be the outward expression of subconscious (what your conscious mind is unaware of or doesn't recall). I read that homosexuals who sought therapy uncovered abuse that was prior to the therapy, unknown, and it was done with the help of a psychologist. When they healed the abuse, they were no longer interested in the same sex and eager to please the opposite sex. Just relaying what I read...

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by wistful

I didn't say it was a disease. Based on what I learned, homosexuality has been found to be the outward expression of subconscious (what your conscious mind is unaware of or doesn't recall). I read that homosexuals who sought therapy uncovered abuse that was prior to the therapy, unknown, and it was done with the help of a psychologist. When they healed the abuse, they were no longer interested in the same sex and eager to please the opposite sex. Just relaying what I read...

This is so enlightening. Good that I logged on before going to work as otherwise I might have wasted yet another day of my life not realizing that our calling and purpose is to

PLEAFSE THE OPPOSITE SEX.

[hamster-bamster]

PLEASE, sorry for the typo.

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by wistful

I didn't say it was a disease. Based on what I learned, homosexuality has been found to be the outward expression of subconscious (what your conscious mind is unaware of or doesn't recall). I read that homosexuals who sought therapy uncovered abuse that was prior to the therapy, unknown, and it was done with the help of a psychologist. When they healed the abuse, they were no longer interested in the same sex and eager to please the opposite sex. Just relaying what I read...

Read it in more detail...

So people like me who are straight and have gone through abuse that is part of their conscious memory are straight strictly because they recall the abuse... right?

The difference between uncured/unhealed homosexuals and abused heterosexuals lies within the fact that unhealed homoseuxals suppressed the abuse into their subconscious while abused heterosexuals are able to recall the abuse... did I get it?

I know that you are just relaying what you read, probably verbatim, but I was tempted to apply tools of analysis to what you relayed, and hence, my checking back with you on whether my train of thought is correct.

[wistful]

The difference between uncured/unhealed homosexuals and abused heterosexuals lies within the fact that unhealed homoseuxals suppressed the abuse into their subconscious while abused heterosexuals are able to recall the abuse... did I get it?

Abuse is remembered, or it is suppressed. It's not a question of heterosexuality or homosexuality.

It could be your admiration that is creating the infactuation

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by wistful

I didn't say it was a disease. Based on what I learned, homosexuality has been found to be the outward expression of subconscious (what your conscious mind is unaware of or doesn't recall). I read that homosexuals who sought therapy uncovered abuse that was prior to the therapy, unknown, and it was done with the help of a psychologist. When they healed the abuse, they were no longer interested in the same sex and eager to please the opposite sex. Just relaying what I read...

I apologize for my post above, that said:

"This is so enlightening. Good that I logged on before going to work as otherwise I might have wasted yet another day of my life not realizing that our calling and purpose is to

PLEAFSE THE OPPOSITE SEX."

Not only did I make a typo, which was a minor defect, but I failed to notice a key, critically important detail in your post, which was a major defect. I am sure this was because I posted before having the morning cup of coffee. I won't do that in the future - I clearly need the caffeine to get the cogntive ability of paying attention to detail. So first coffee, then read, then think, then post.

Now having had a cup of coffee, I do see that I missed the word "eager", and that word really changes the whole picture. I stand corrected.

Recently, I became eager to lose weight. I was in good shape at the end of last year, and then, possibly through a combination of stopping physical exercise and suffering the metabolic effects of having taking a number of psychoactive drugs in the past, I have gained weight.

Initially, I became eager to lose weight for egotistic, selfish purposes - I hate how my clothing fits me now. So tight around the waste! Hate it hate it hate it.

Now that I have reread your post with attention to detail, though, I have become eager to lose weight for selfless, altruistic purposes as well. I work in an office with 80%+ males - a bunch of friendly geeks - and although I have no sexual relations with any of them, they are required to see me every workday (we are not allowed to work remotely unless sick). So my bulging belly, as of recently, might be visually disPLEASing to them. Geez, I sure hope they realize I did not do it on purpose to spite them...

So now I am EAGER to visually PLEASE the OPPOSITE SEX by losing the stomach fat.

Is that ENOUGH (does it meet the requirements of being EAGER TO PLEASE THE OPPOSITE SEX)?

If that is enough, you do not need costly, time-consuming therapy to arrive at the state of being EAGER TO PLEASE THE OPPOSITE SEX - all it takes is a cup of coffee and two minutes of thinking things through.

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by Soups

It could be your admiration that is creating the infactuation

In any event, Anthony, what you are experiencing admiring the actor and being drawn to him in some way sure sounds like fun and I hope you enjoy the experience. Admiration, infatuation, etc. all can be enjoyed, as experiences you live through.

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by wistful

H-B's question to you was: "The difference between uncured/unhealed homosexuals and abused heterosexuals lies within the fact that unhealed homoseuxals suppressed the abuse into their subconscious while abused heterosexuals are able to recall the abuse... did I get it?"

Your response was: "Abuse is remembered, or it is suppressed. It's not a question of heterosexuality or homosexuality."

That abuse is either remembered or not (which is pretty much the case with any sort of experience of any kind of nature) is now very clear to me, so thanks. You take it a bit further by stating that abuse, if not remembered, is "suppressed" - not just neutrally "not remembered" (as in "by chance" or due to insufficient RAM in the brain of the victim) but actively "suppressed". I am willing to believe that. However, how did it answer my question to you?