Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Aug 07, 2013, 11:54 AM
SQLVR SQLVR is offline
Member
 
Member Since: May 2011
Location: MA
Posts: 209
I can't believe I'm actually writing about this.
I have a history of emotional and possible sexual abuse. I don't like to actually have sex, I actually find it kind of revolting, but I do masturbate, sometimes up to 3 times a day. I usually have fantasies about being in personally humiliating and degrading situations while I masturbate.
For both religious and personal reasons I want this to stop. I have been able to cut down a lot but not stop completely. I can't ask my therapist for help, because it would be way to awkward.
Does anyone have any suggestions on how to make this stop?
Hugs from:
AppalachianAxis
Thanks for this!
AppalachianAxis

advertisement
  #2  
Old Aug 07, 2013, 02:05 PM
AppalachianAxis AppalachianAxis is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Sep 2012
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 156
Quote:
Originally Posted by SQLVR View Post
I can't believe I'm actually writing about this.
I have a history of emotional and possible sexual abuse. I don't like to actually have sex, I actually find it kind of revolting, but I do masturbate, sometimes up to 3 times a day. I usually have fantasies about being in personally humiliating and degrading situations while I masturbate.
For both religious and personal reasons I want this to stop. I have been able to cut down a lot but not stop completely. I can't ask my therapist for help, because it would be way to awkward.
Does anyone have any suggestions on how to make this stop?
I'm afraid I don't know any sure-fire solution. But I can at the very least offer my condolences and say that's you're not alone.
I'm in a very similar boat. I suffered no abuse of any kind growing up, but I understand how it feels to have the concept of sex be revolting and for masturbation to produce profound feelings for guilt or much worse. Especially when fantasies are involved.

I would highly advise you to talk to your therapist about this. If you really are too uncomfortable with the one you're currently seeing to bring the subject up, then try to visit a few others in your area to try and find one that works well for you.
I'm currently in therapy almost exclusively for this very reason. And I can tell you that talking about it and working through it with a therapist, while certainly more than a little uncomfortable, can do you a world of good.
My own is in fact currently debating on if should I start taking medication for OCD in order to control the compulsion and gradually diminish my sex drive as a kind of bonus side-effect.

I don't recommend you start taking meds as you're first step however. As I said, talk to a therapist. You say you want to change for personal and religious reasons and in order to move forward towards your goal, you will need to come to a better understanding of your own motivations.
I too have been able to cut down on my masturbation significantly but I understand how that's not enough.
Hugs from:
hamster-bamster
  #3  
Old Aug 15, 2013, 12:58 PM
ocdwifeofsociopath ocdwifeofsociopath is offline
Member
 
Member Since: May 2013
Posts: 480
I would try distraction with something you find really fun to do or that re-directs your brain. Like a good movie, or a game. Something that is going to completely take your mind off of it. At night before bed, maybe exercise or drink something that will make you super sleepy so you just fall asleep and have no energy to do it?
Thanks for this!
tohelpafriend
  #4  
Old Aug 20, 2013, 03:28 AM
hamster-bamster hamster-bamster is offline
Account Suspended
 
Member Since: Sep 2011
Location: Northern California
Posts: 14,805
if you masturbate thrice a day, then you can probably cut out one of those three times by taking sleeping pills so you would cut out the night time masturbation session.

Exercise before bed does make some people sleepy. It can however hinder sleep in others, so you won't know until you try.
  #5  
Old Aug 20, 2013, 03:34 AM
hamster-bamster hamster-bamster is offline
Account Suspended
 
Member Since: Sep 2011
Location: Northern California
Posts: 14,805
Also, can you masturbating to more uplifting fantasies? Maybe what grosses you out is the content of humiliating fantasies. Maybe this part can be helped. Can you masturbate mechanically (without accompanying fantasies)? There is a lot going on - humiliation / being degraded, religious reasons, personal reasons, possible abuse, the frequency that may interfere with the day-by-day life, the lack of confidence in speaking up in therapy sessions, etc. - a whole host of issues. So I am wondering if taking small steps - say, reducing the frequency and changing the fantasy content - rather than completely shutting it down - would help you.
Reply
Views: 1737

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 12:46 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.