Feeling worthy?

Why is it some people walk the planet like they own the place and others of us struggle to grasp some sense of self-worth? Are we born this way? Is it genetic? I have some issue blaming it all on my past....my childhood. I know it may be part....but it can't be all.

Are other people that much more confident or just better at faking it??

I can not answer this question but I have seen this very thing.I think environment,genetics,personal experience,and inner pain(or how we deal with this pain.)I am trapped in the very same quandry.I am sending you a hug from my heart collection.Love,Lynn

Thanks heartrythm43. It is a miserable feeling and a question I've been asking as long as I can remember. I appreciate your kind words

I also have the same problem and I think peoples childhood definitely has a big role in shaping ones self esteem as well as other external factors. I hope we all can feel more confident cause really, no one else can take our place on this earth. Maybe it takes others longer to truely find themselves.

many are just better at faking it at least part of the time. ev1 lacks self-esteem at one time or another. me personally? i have extreme self-esteem issues so i can relate. most people think i am strong and confident. fact is im a gr8 actress. peacehang in there!! u r not alone!!

Good point. I'm sure you must be right. I guess it just "seems" other people are better off

I feel worthless much of the time, but I find that when I am out in public that I put on a show of being happy, even when I don't want to. It's sort of programmed into me. I would like to behave more true to my feelings around others, especially when I am at the doctor. It's hard to convince them you are not okay when you are smiling.

We become good actors, don't we. Sometimes pretending you are happy can actually lead to a better mood. I call myself a "clown" because I am prone to joking around even when I'm feeling down. It is definitely a cover-up.

At the doctor though, I am unfortunately much more vulnerable. Usually if someone asks me "How are you?" and actually means it, the waterworks will start. Ah well....I prefer the cover-up.

We have to remind ourselves Galetre, that we are NOT worthless....it is only a "feeling". We have value!!

Even if you do admit to anyone how you are really feeling inside they dont know what to say or do. They have an image of how they see you and when you tell them the truth of how you really feel about youself. They dont want to know. Most time all they want is for when they ask you how you doing all they want to hear is I'm fine thank you even if it shows on your face that you are not in a good place they just want to hear you say you are ok. Sometimes if you do say how you feel they say oh you seem ok to me. so what can you do?

Muser, I have problems with self-worth as well. I agree that it does seem that everyone else seems so confident, so sure of themselves, and it can be a real downer, but lately I've been working on my self-worth, and things are looking better, but it's not easy. I hope you can come to terms with your issues, because everyone deserves to feel good about who they are, everyone has something worth contributing to this crazy ride called life.

You're right Lilleth. No one wants to know how we really feel. It catches them quite off guard if when asked "How are you?" you actually say "Terrible!" PsychCentral is the one place I have found to be different. People actually empathize with that reply and understand that you're not necessarily just having a bad day.

shadowghost002, I think a lot of people we think are so confident are just as insecure as we are....they are just hiding it. Hiding it is OK to a point. I think of it as "practicing" to be confident.

What I'd like to have is that true sense of worth. Recently I spoke to a guy I knew in high-school. I was really taken back that he had a totally different perception of me back then than I did.

Worth-Perception-Value-Confidence....hard to sort them all out.

Muser, I think part of the problem might be that people like us try too hard to actively find self-worth outside ourselves. It can't be found, it's an inner state of being that comes from realizing you accomplished, or are trying to accomplish, something, no matter how big or small. It's not as important to actually accomplish something as it is to try, to give it your best. At least you can take pride in having made the attempt, even if you failed.

I still maintain that some...due to genetics....some form of hard wired over sized ego... are blessed with an exaggerated notion of their own importance.

If I sound jealous...to a certain degree....I am