[Katix3]

I was doing my homework and I was just think about ..why don't I like myself. First off I have really bad self-esteem ever since I was like in the 6th grade. I've even stop interacting with people trying to make friends is not an option for me I start crying around crowds I don't know anyone in. Okay So I flipped the page and wrote 10 things I hate about myself...
1-I'm ugly
2-I'm fat
3-I have eczema
4-I'm a loser
5-I self injure
6-I have nothing special about me (no talents)
7-I'm stupid( My grades suck
8-That I hate myself
9-I only have 1 good friend that I tell everything to
10-I'm not social
Now the worst part about this is I wrote the 10 things I "like" and only could only think of 1 thing -_-. I struggled with this and I feel like complete crap for it.
10 things I like about myself........
1-I defend myself when I need to.
2-\
3-\
4-\
5-\
6-\
7-\
8-\
9-\
10-\
Try it and see what you get or how you feel after

[unaluna]

Katix - mind if I rewrite your 'things you hate about yourself' list?

1-I'm ugly
- watch the twilight zone (original series) episode starring Donna Douglas, then think again.
2-I'm fat
- you'll survive a famine, THEN we'll be popular!
3-I have eczema
- you're a good speller?
4-I'm a loser
- hey at least you play the game
5-I self injure
- you are coping the best you can
6-I have nothing special about me (no talents)
- the future can be anything!
7-I'm stupid (my grades suck)
- sorry, but one does not necessarily follow from the other
8-That I hate myself
- two negatives make a positive
9-I only have 1 good friend that I tell everything to
- you have 1 good friend that you can tell everything to!
10-I'm not social
- uh, you're talking to a million people here!

This was a good exercise for me - thanks! I think we did stuff like this in DBT. I have unearthed my books, BTW, and I now know where they are. But once I get my apartment cleaned & certified, I am going to sleep for a week!

Ten dislikes
1. bad memory
2. clumsy
3. anxiety attacks
4. procrastinator
5. losing strength with age
6. thinning hair
7. crooked teeth
8. bad money manager
9. depression
10. cannot get thoughts onto paper well

Ten Likes
1. I am a decent cook
2. I love to learn new things
3. I raised two loving sons
4. I care for others
5. I have good skin
6. I can take a lot of crap from people (25 yearrs of customer service)
7. I am honest
8. I am reliable
9. Been told I ask good questions in lectures
10. I am highly ethical

[faerie_moon_x]

This is a good post, and hankster is right. Taking those negative things and finding positives in them is a good idea. I'm going to make my list like that too. I also agree that being stupid and having poor grades is not the same thing. As you feel better grades improve, I saw a direct relationship to my grades and my mood cycles when I was in high school.

Also, you have one friend that you can confide in! That's amazing! You may look at those popular people surrounded by "friends." But out of all those people most of them are just acquaintances and won't be there for them when times get really tough. It is better to have one good friend than fifty bad ones. And good friends are extremely hard to find.

1) I am ugly
-But my husband isn't ugly and he married me, so that must mean something
2) I am fat
-But, I know this is something I change if I just work on it.
3) I failed at reaching my dreams
-But I still keep trying so maybe there is hope
4) I'm losing my talents
-By taking control of my illness maybe I can stop this progression
5) I make a lot of mistakes
- I do my best to learn from those mistakes
6) I feel worthless
- I am important to my kids
7) I am lazy
- I'm not lazy, I am struggling with a serious illness that is untreated
8) I'm stupid
- I've held a complex job for almost four years despite my struggles.
9) I'm annoying
- This is someone's opinion, it doesn't make it true
10) I get too nervous about little things
- As I get better this will get better, too

Okay, now the good things
1) I am a good writer
2) I am a good singer
3) I can make people laugh
4) I care about other people
5) I'm a loyal person
6) I'm decent at crochet
7) My kids say I'm the "best mommy in the world"
8) I do my best to take care of my family
9) I haven't given up on healing
10) I've made it this far, I must be stronger than I realize.

you beatiful!

i strugglle

i can't speel

i shake i am
overwhelmed
I am tidy...but

I make shitloads of mess

my nose sux

there is a thing with my toe that I don't like

my left ear is deformed

hairs keep dropping off me
skin itches

i am never comfortable

i hate my reflection

it looks nasty

when people talk to me I already know whats wrong with them.....

I can't be real..

not like that

[Rose76]

10 things is too overwhelming for me right now, but I'm going to go with one, because I think this thread is cool and I want to participate:

I hate: 1) having to put down so many different jobs that I didn't keep for very long on my applications for work. (They find out, even if you don't tell them, thanks to modern background checking technology.)

I love: 1) being able to skip over that section on the applications that asks for an explanation of any felony convictions.

Originally Posted by Rose76

10 things is too overwhelming for me right now, but I'm going to go with one, because I think this thread is cool and I want to participate:

I hate: 1) having to put down so many different jobs that I didn't keep for very long on my applications for work. (They find out, even if you don't tell them, thanks to modern background checking technology.)

I love: 1) being able to skip over that section on the applications that asks for an explanation of any felony convictions.

I so understand your pain with applications and work history!!!!

[Onward2wards]

Good exercise, thanks for posting.

Hate:

1. I take criticism very literally
2. I have truly poor assertiveness skills
3. Although I have deep convictions I don't always walk the talk
4. I am only ever organized at work
5. I procrastinate
6. I worry too much
7. I can't take a compliment at face value
8. I don't open up as much as I think I do
9. I sometimes act like I'm a loser and everyone else is a rockstar, and then ...
10. I brood and sulk!!

Love:

1. I care deeply about people
2. I have principles
3. I am creative
4. I am imaginative
5. I can see things from different perspectives
6. I am in touch with myself most of the time
7. I can see the details in a situation
8. I can be very optimistic and ambitious
9. I have a sense of humor
10. I am precise

[skyscraper]

My Dislikes:

1. I'm ugly
2. I have the worst acne in the world!
3. I don't have any friends, because I don't talk
4. I'm not social, I tend to avoid a lot of social situations(especially at school)
5. I'm fat, all I do is eat my feelings a way
6. I'm annoying, my mom and my dad want nothing to do w/ me
7. I'm unmotivated, I never want to do anything but lay down and watch TV
8. I'm dumb, my grades suck
9. I take things too serious
10. I let people and my feelings bring me down
11. I'm easily influenced, it's like I don't have a mind of my own
12. Sometimes I take my anger out on objects or my brother
13. I let myself become mentally ill
14. I lost all the friends I use to have

My Likes:

1. I like my eyes and my finger nails
2. I have a good heart, most of the time
3. I care about others

Putting this list together was somewhat hard for me. I really had to stop and think about my likes/dislikes. It's really sad to me that I only could only find 3 things that I like about my self verses 14 things that I absolutely hate about my self. I'm on the verge of breaking down...

[PurpleFlyingMonkeys]

My dislikes:
1. I'm too over emotional
2. I have a large ammount of extra skin from my weight loss
3. I am extremely insecure
4. I am overbearing
5. I am way too needy
6. I am way too jealous of anyone
7. I go to the extremes, either way too much or way too little
8. I am afraid of myself
9. I am a perfectionist which gives me reason to quit when I can't perfect it
10. I lack concentration

My likes:
1. I am beautiful
2. I am intelligent
3. I am mature and level headed
4. I can do just about anything I try to do
5. I have limitless possibilities
6. I love my daughter with everything I have
7. I do my best to be a good person
8. I love and follow God
9. I have strong morals
10. I'm still standing even though many many people have tried to bring me down

Easier than I thought on both sides Thanks for this

[AlabasterMoon]

This forum is a pity party. Toxic people everywhere everyday are waiting to degrade and dismiss you. You already understand the difference between acceptance and rejection that come in various forms. Instead of embracing the lie that you're worthless, stupid, ugly, fat, unambitious or whatever else you hear from family / others, realize that many people are broken-winged birds. They cannot fly because their wings were once clipped by others who were hurting. Stop clipping your own wings. I don't necessarily believe that one can create or build a brand new self-esteem anymore than a broken-winged bird will every fly properly again. But they can learn to fly, perhaps not as high as a healthy bird, but fly they can. The principle applies to human beings too. You possess a heck of a lot more resilience than you realize. You wouldn't be here if you didn't. You would have taken your own life if you truly believed the negative thoughts you hear inside your head and from others. Stop the self-pity. It doesn't look good on you. It's certainly not attractive.

[PurpleFlyingMonkeys]

I'm not sure that I understand how this is a "pity party" when the intention is for one to point out the things they are insecure about and counter it with things they do like about themselves. A way to build self esteem is to learn to turn negative thoughts into positive thoughts and that is what this post helps someone do.

[so_punk_rock]

Ten things i hate about myself:
1.the extra weight
2.my breasts
3.my stretch marks
4.my depression
5.my anxiety
6.my excessive/obsessive daydreaming
7.i procrastinate
8.too insecure
9.emotionally disturbed
10.my skin/body hair
11.im passive
12.lack of drive or motivation to accomplish my goals
13.im mean when im depressed and irritable
14.i must admit im a little bitter at times
15.im too hard on myself
(sorry, i know i went overboard.)

ten things i like about myself
1.i dont like my body as much as i should but i think im kind of pretty despite that
2.im intelligent
3.im loyal
4.im resilient
5.i actually have goals
6.im creative
7.im really funny
8.i like helping people and animals
9.i have a wild imagination
10.im open-minded
11.im genuinely nice
12.i have the potential to be so much better
13.im really ambitious lol, despite my lack of motivation
14.im generous
15.i like making people laugh/smile
16.i can do a lot of good things while im in this world

............this was a really good exercise. I actually feel better about myself.

[pinkfloyd_kay]

Ten things I hate about myself:
1. I'm very shy
2. I complain a lot
3. I procrastinate
4. I get jealous easily
5. I'm stubborn
6. I can be very mean
7. I'm forgetful
...you know, I can't even think of the rest of the million reasons I thought I had! Great exercise!

Ten things I like about myself:
1. My hair
2. My eyes
3. My smile
4. I'm very mature for my age
5. I care more about others than myself
6. I'm intelligent
7. I'm thoughtful
8. I'm creative
9. I play a rockin' bass!
10. I'm dependable

[Nemo39122]

I've been looking at this thread for awhile now...I think I can finally make up a list. Hmm...

Hate:

1. Depression/the kind of person depression has turned me into.
2. My shyness and lack of anything resembling social skills.
3. My sexual orientation.
4. My past (and current) problems with SI.
5. I procrastinate all the time, and have concentration issues on top of it. I convince myself this means I'm lazy.
6. I lie to everyone I know (IRL) on a daily basis.
7. I can't get myself to tell my friends I love them more than anything.
8. My appearance, most of the time anyway.
9. My extreme fear of needles.
10. I don't let myself get close to people.
11. It's nearly impossible for me to express how I feel.
12. I let her disappear...
13. I don't care anymore.
14. I never defend myself or stand up for myself.
15. Everything.
16. I hide how I feel, even if I don't need to.
17. Who I am, compared to who I could be.
......oh, it was only 10 things? oops.

Like:

1. I will do ANYTHING for people I care about. I'll defend them more than I defend myself. I'll defend them more than they defend themselves. I'm like an overprotective guard dog or something. Yeah, don't **** with Nemo's friends.
2. My ability to love and experience music on a level most people don't seem to understand.
3. My sense of humor.
4. ***Trigger warning*** At the age of 12 I strongly believed I would kill myself by the age of 18. I didn't think I'd be in college, definitely didn't think I would be teaching martial arts. Here I am.
5. I've been told I'm very mature for my age.
6. An entire karate school loves me. That must mean something, right?...

[crazylife]

10 dislikes.
1. My arms are covered in scars.
2. I lie to much.
3. Psoriasis.
4. I don't feel real.
5. I hate my nose.
6. I can't cope.
7. My emotions are crazy strong.
8. I can't stand people leaving.
9. I don't know how to react.
10. This was to easy.

10 likes.
1. I have long dark eyelashes.
2. My hair is quite nice at times.
3. I'm quite skinny.
4. I care about others.
5. I love to listen to people.
6. I can empathize with people, most of the time.
7. That i love my amazing boyfriend as much as i did the first day we met.
8. I survive.
9. I always find a way to deal.
10. I'm a good person.

The picture you have on your message, Nemo is very motivational. Thank you for that.

[TealOrca12]

Here are my lists!

1. I procrastinate/avoid too much (seems like a common one on here).
2. I have not always been good with money, and sometimes have spent too much and made bad decisions.
3. I get too emotional about sports.
4. I don't like that I'm anxious all the time.
5. I don't exercise enough.
6. Sometimes I eat poorly.
7. I stay online more than I should.
8. Sometimes, I take things too personally.
9. Sometimes, I forget to do important things (like pay bills...oops).
10. I'm messy and disorganized a lot...

1. Despite procrastination, I don't give up on things and always get back on track!
2. I am working on turning the money problems around.
3. I am a *passionate* and knowledgeable sports fan.
4. I am empathic towards others with anxiety and other ailments because I understand!
5. I try not to be too hard on myself for not being a Jillian Michaels about fitness :P
6. I try not to be hard on myself about food- I have recovered from an eating disorder and my relationship with food has greatly improved.
7. When I'm online, at least I'm connecting with others- AND I love my social circles, both online and off.
8. It's okay that I'm a sensitive person- it means I relate well to others.
9. Becoming more responsible is a work in progress...and I am getting there.
10. Being messy seems to be a psychologist trait..and I am *almost* a doctor of psychology <----huge accomplishment, yay!

[Rose76]

Coming up with 10 and 10 seems overwhelming, but I want to see what I can manage:

Things I hate:
1) I throw in the towel prematurely, sometimes, and feel like a quitter.
2) I am not as young as I used to be.
3) I get depressed often.
4) I am prone to being oversensitive and I over-react to things.
5) I haven't done anything to feel proud of in too long of a time.

Things I love:
1) I did things in the past that I feel glad to have done.
2) I know the difference between what's pretty good and what's really good.
3) I'll give up a lot to stick to my principles.
4) I have fairly decent principles.
5) I've given a lot of myself to those I care about.

[KazzaX]

Thinks I hate:

1. I'm useless
2. I can't shower
3. I can't wash my clothes
4. I can't leave the house
5. I can't change any of this
6. I have no skills
7. I have no money
8. (soon) I will be homeless
9. I have no family (I disowned them)
10. I am not oblivious to reality (sometimes Id like to be oblivious)

Things I like:
1. I see through people's BS facades in a split second
2. Good at budgeting
3. I trust nobody so therefore I am never let down by people
4. I cut the crap and get down to business when I am faced with a solvable problem
5. Good at video games
6. Good at logic
7. I have no use for other people therefore I don't fall into the trap of drama and gossip
8. I am still alive
9. I can breathe
10. I can exist

[Rose76]

Things I hate:

1) I don't know when to shut up.
2) I alienate a person without first thinking whether that is smart to do.
3) I am irritable.
4) I can make a federal case out of a misdemeanor.
5) I like to have the last word.
6) I belabor the point to where I become obnoxious.
7) I take offense all too easily.
8) I let my emotional state take complete control of my brain.
9) I fail to check the facts before reacting.
10) I get altogether too full of myself.

Things I like:

1) I eventually realize it when I have been a pompous donkey.
2) I can totally reform my opinion when I see evidence that it is wrong-headed.
3) I will attempt to reconstruct a bridge that I foolishly burned.
4) I deeply regret having given offense to someone.
5) I am able to forgive being treated badly.
6) I look for the good in those whom I don't like.
7) I sincerely regret my many faults.
8) I love replacing adversity with good will.
9) I try to think things through fully, once I calm down.
10) I think I eventually gain a balanced perspective on most things I think about.

Ten dislikes
1. on-going anxiety levels
2. cannot express what I feel
3. unorganized
4. have ugly feet
5. cannot reduce wieght no matter what I do
6. thinning hair
7. bad knees and right hip
8. give in to fear too easily
9. cannot seem to perform up to employer's expectations
10. don't trust men at all

Ten Likes
1. I know a lot of different things
2. I love to learn new things
3. I I am very loving with animals
4. I love to help others
5. I am still pushing on instead of giving up
6. I have lived in many places (cities, suburbs, outports, farms, mountains and oceans and prairies)
7. I can put people at ease
8. I love to hug
9. I am highly adaptable to changes
10. I believe in equality for all people

[AniManiac]

Dislikes - and counteracting thoughts:

1. I'm currently overweight (I am working on changing that)
2. I lose things often (this is an ADD symptom)
3. I'm lousy at keeping the house clean (I really do have more important things to do)
4. I hate most forms of exercise (but I've found a few that I love)
5. I think I'm never going to outgrow acne (I take extra care of my skin to mitigate the effects)
6. It takes me forever to get out of the house (ADD again)
7. I'm not good at cutting myself slack when I'm feeling ill (I'm trying to accept my limitations)
8. I am really bad at work/life balance (I love what I do but I'm trying to keep workaholic tendencies in check)
9. I'm easily frustrated (I try to keep things in perspective)
10. My moods and cognitive functioning are unpredictable (I'm getting treatment for bipolar)

Likes:

1. I'm very, very good at what I do
2. I have great interpersonal relationships
3. I'm a very skilled knitter, an excellent photographer, and a good cook
4. I'm observant
5. I have exceptional endurance, persistence, and determination
6. I have a different perspective than most people
7. I'm loyal, trustworthy, and mostly reliable
8. I live my life according to my values
9. I don't compromise on my goals
10. I'm passionate about almost everything I do

[Italianma]

Hate:
I'm Fat
I can't stop eating
I'm a bad speller
I'm too sensitive
I cry to often
I put up with too much crap for many years
I bite my nails
I'm nervous
I'm passive

Likes:
My smile
How I love to give to others
I'm honest
Dependable
My loving relationship with my children
Sense of humor