Triggering - the sexual abuse no one talks about - ever

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The sexual abuse that no one ever talks about... do they??
Is it because it doesn't exist OR is it simply so shameful that no one can ever talk about it - EVER?????

Sexual abuse by a husband ... on his wife.....

Is it rape, if it is your husband....

Is it rape, if you end up getting sitches? Does rape matter if it is done to a wife? After all, it is just a "wife". Isn't that how all wives are treated? If a wife says "NO", must mean "YES"... it's a "WIFE"

Is it rape, if your doctor doesn't ask, and "how did you get these injuries" BeCAUSE - guess what he really doesn't want to know.... does he?.... if he did know, he might have to do something other than stich you up Right?

Must NOT be rape, cause you are still sitting across from your ex-husband 19 years later, pretending that the physical and sexual abuse never happen - as you share an Easter dinner with your adult child - AFTER all it's just expected... ISN"T IT? all so very civil... RIGHT??

Definition of physical abuse, using a closed fist to hit your wife - of course back slapping, popping her ear drum by hitting her ear, leaving bruises on arms, choking til she passes out, locking her out of the house in her nightie, tearing the ligaments out of her scapula..... welllll we can't REALLY call that abuse CAN we???

And the names " worthless piece of ----", "not worth the air you breathe", "dirt that I walk on has more value than you" -
well that's just a hubby getting cranky... RIGHT???
Twelve years of marriage, isn't really a long time to keep a secret - that NO ONE knows, is it? No one guesses, no one notices, OR do they BUT it just isn't anything that is ever talked about.. RIGTH?

So this is the first Easter, I have no regrets about turning down a "family" dinner with my ex-husband...
It is also the first step in healing and saying "NO" to my ED... and to secrets....

The questions weren't really to be answered - THANK YOU
all for allowing me to finally, finally tell my "secret"....

With this comes the next step of healing.

Sincerely,
freewill

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Freewill}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

You're not alone, Hon.

Well done.. you've done a very hard thing, but you've taken a huge step. Now you can start to heal. I wish you well *hugs*

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freewill said:
The sexual abuse that no one ever talks about... do they??

Is it because it doesn't exist OR is it simply so shameful that no one can ever talk about it - EVER?????

Sexual abuse by a husband ... on his wife.....

Is it rape, if it is your husband....

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<font color="purple"> ((((((( HUGS ))))))) ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ((((((( HUGS )))))))) </font>

It has been talked about on here (early 2006) -
by 3 or 4 different wives that went through this matter you now speak of.... and a G/F or two.

http://forums.psychcentral.com/showf...rt=&PHPSESSID=


http://forums.psychcentral.com/showf...t=1&PHPSESSID=


http://forums.psychcentral.com/showf...t=1&PHPSESSID=

((Freewill))

Hi Freewill,
I had a freind who suffered abuse and rape from her husband. It was hard for her to accept it and heal, but she is making it. Matter of fact, she is doing really well. At the time, it was really hard for me to support her. It seemed everything I said was so...I don't know, like all I could do was encourage her and tell her I cared, but I always felt like words were not enough. I know I probably should not say this--violence does not help and it is not the answer--but I got so angry I wanted to beat the crap out fo the jerk. She had to heal on her own time. I was sexually abused--I can understand a bit of what you are going through. Yeah, I can relate to the silence from people who are suppose to help--doctors and such. Good for you for saying no to Easter dinner with him. Stay strong--it sounds like you are on the road to recovery. Good post--keep posting! Send me a message if you ever want to talk or vent or whatever.

(((((((((((((((((freewill))))))))))))))))

good for you for saying all this. i admire and bow down to youfor being so very brave

my love forever

jinnyann xoxoxoxox