[RACEKA]

I will be starting to talk about my past child abuse by my mother with my therapist. I've been putting it off, but I think it is time. I am really scared. I am in my 40's. I want to ask him if it will be ok to bring a teddy bear to squeeze. I use it at home. Do you think this is ok? Do I sound childish? Has anyone ever done this?

This isn't childish at all... we need all the comfort that we can get.. and I am so sorry that you had the childhood abuse in the first place...

[Doonney]

Childish? Not at all. 4 - 40 - or 400, I really think we all could do with any and all comfort - copping mechanisms - we can think of.

I', sorry your scared and have to face this alone - as we all must do - but everyone at PC is here for you just as I'm sure all your loved ones are there for you. Please lean on us and them to get through this time.

Of course it's OK, if this is what you need to get through this.

[lenjan]

Not only is it OK, my last T (the first one I told about the abuse) actually encouraged me to bring a bear or blanket or something comforting.

Talking about it (I was in my late 30s at the time) is one of the hardest things I've ever done -- anything that will help you feel better while you do it is fair game.

Good luck and PM if you need to.

Love, Candy

[allthegirls6]

I dont think its childish. It sounds to me like a very clever idea and I hope you can go with it. I know I have comforters for T. It makes a huge difference

[tranquility]

Not at all! During one of my hospitalizations when I was 24 I crocheted a pink outfit and headband for my teddy. I still have "Pinky" upstairs in my bedroom and I'm 42 now. I don't need her anymore, but I do like being able to look at her

Tranquility

[RACEKA]

Thanks everyone for your responses. Now I will feel better about taking my comfort with me.

[ErinBear]

Hi Raceka,

I'd say go for it, if it is okay with your T! I've done this in the past, and the last main counselor I saw was fine with it, and it really helped me in my counseling work, in fact. That was one of the things that helped me trust him better over time, as an added plus....I could see that he appreciated my bear just as much as I did!!! :-) I could see even more clearly that he had a good heart. The T I have been seeing lately has an anti-teddy-bear policy, and never even wanted to meet my bear. This seemed like a bad sign to me, frankly. And I think it is.

I think having something to lend comfort during a session, whether you are able to have a teddy bear with you, or hug a pillow, or some other alternative - can be really useful! Sometimes I bring smooth rocks from a favorite beach. I put them in my pocket and if I get stressed, I put my hand in my pocket and feel the smooth rocks. Sometimes it just helps to feel something that reminds me of a good, encouraging place. There are all sorts of ways of encouraging ourselves, I think.

I wish you all the best in your healing process. And best wishes to your teddy bear, also!

Take care,
ErinBear

[RACEKA]

I saw my counselor yesterday and asked him if it was ok to bring something to comfort me, like a stuffed animal. He said that would be great. He said he some stress balls, but I said I'd rather have something soft I can hug and squeeze.

Thanks again everyone.