does anyone remember? *trigger*

when they were younger someone checking to see if you had wet yourself by putting their hand on you under your trousers (i dont know if it was under my underwear or not)? this was certainly after i was out of nappies. by a long shot.
if that is appropriate would it be appropriate to do it in front of the kids friends?
please i would like opinions on this. thank you.

I'm not sure if I'd say appropriate or not, but I've known people to do it innocently, but i'm sure it could be done in impure ways also.

I would think that any child wearing underpants - rather than diapers - is old enough to say for themselves if they are wet or not. I never did that to either of my boys when they were little. I would ask them - and at first it was obvious that they wet because they soaked through. I don't ever recall inquiring about whether they were wet or not in front of their playmates - I think that would be embarassing.

For children wearing diapers who are almost ready for underpants but just not there yet - it is not easy to determine if they are wet or not because the diapers usually absorb.

i was 2 when we moved to a new house. i was 2 and 3 months when my sister was born. we had a babysitter for a while after that that was totally inappropriate. locked us outside in bare feet etc. then one i loved for a short while. then this other one who checked me. so id say i was at a minimum 3 plus. she was with us for a couple of years as far as i know and im sure i was older than 3. maybe up to 5. i cant say. maybe even older. it was her who did it. i used to hate her like no one else. i didnt hate anyone but i could have killed her. i did NOT want to be left with her. i wanted my mother to never let us near her again. is 3 young enough to still be doing that? checking i mean?

edited to add that my mother, knowing her, was probably off work for a good while after my sister was born so i was probably at least 4 before this woman i hated started to look after us.

I'm thinking that 4 years old is too old for an adult to check for wet pants in that manner. She should have just asked you - I wonder if she was ignorant or something ?

((((((((((((biiv))))))))))))))))

There are many things that are only just coming back to me now, things that disturbed me even at a young age, I didn't understand what was going on, but now it's all too clear.

I wondered fora longtimewhy my mother put her finger right inside me to wash me when I was 8 years old, I never did this to my daughter but until recently I wasn't sure if this was appropriate behaviour, why would she be bathing me at 8 years old? I have my reasons as to why she did it- but that's another story. Sending you gentle hugs, pm me anytime.

love, jinny xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

((((((((((((((((((jinny))))))))))))))))))))))))))
im so sorry that happened to you. it is certainly inappropriate to say the least.
take care of you
biiv