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#1
Jun 30, 2008, 03:40 PM
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Everynight... lately I go to bed.. and sleep..
and I am raped... by my father.. I have the same fear, the same pain, the same repulsion, the same "owies"... and the terror... and my father... saying... the things.. he says... I have been told.. countless times... "the past is the past, do not live in the past".. However, I am raped.. every night... here.. now.. in my present... I... need to have the pain go away... before.. an alter takes things into her own hands.. and... makes the pain go away permenantly... |
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#2
Jun 30, 2008, 06:00 PM
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No words, just
((((((freewill))))))) |
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#3
Jul 01, 2008, 12:34 PM
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i am listening... i understand how the past becomes the present... and you can't just leave it behind you... what i try to do after i have one of those dreams... which right now is almost every night... is to try and change the ending when i wake up... maybe that will help you ....lyn
__________________
lyn one could do worse then be a swinger of birches. ~robert frost~
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#4
Jul 01, 2008, 04:22 PM
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safe hugs ((((( freewill )))))
don't you want to just smack people who tell you "the past is the past. and stop living in the past" they are the same stupid people who tell us depressed people to "snap out of it. and you can choose to be happy" *smacks stupid people* i haven't got an answer for you. wish i did. but i am very sorry you are going through such a rough time. i do hope the nightmares stop! do you go to bed worrying that you will have a nightmare? maybe if you try to daydream something nice, it'll cause you not to have a nightmare? idk prolly a dumb suggestion. just hate knowing you have to suffer through that abuse over and over.  take care!
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#5
Jul 01, 2008, 10:23 PM
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Yes I hate people who tell me thatl. I am trying to get better and in order to do that I have to share and sometimes I have to share multiple times. I try to find people who have been there and understand that.
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#6
Jul 02, 2008, 09:56 PM
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thank you all for your loving support.....
I went to body work T today.... it is very effective work... and he was able.. to help... me... help.... the 13 year old alter... that was hurt so badly..by the pedophile and also the little 6 year old.. that was hurt so badly.. by her father.. next week.. I am.. praying to make contact with the 4 year old alter...that has also.. been hurt... today... the body work therapist.. and I helped.. the 13 and 6 year old understand... that NO.. the abusers are gone.. out of our life.. And.. we adult alters.. will NOT.. let anyone else hurt us... so.. I am praying.. when I go to bed tonight... that I will have some peace.. they have been trying to 'tell' me.. that they were hurt... and scared.. that more of that kind of hurt.. is going to happen.. so.. wish me good.. thoughts on this... ((love to all of you))) |
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#7
Jul 03, 2008, 01:58 AM
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((((((freewill))))))
__________________
lyn one could do worse then be a swinger of birches. ~robert frost~
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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