Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Aug 10, 2008, 10:08 PM
insecurity's Avatar
insecurity insecurity is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jul 2007
Location: Virginia
Posts: 40
Does anyone think past physical abuse growing up and being raped by a friend as a teenager could lead someone do desire being physically hurt and abused as an adult and also lead to strange sexual desires that normal people might not have? I'm so confused. Past Abuse and Present Deviance?

insecuity

advertisement
  #2  
Old Aug 11, 2008, 01:38 AM
bchlyn's Avatar
bchlyn bchlyn is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,162
i don't have the answers to your questions... but i am listening... are you in t?...lyn
__________________
lyn
one could do worse then be a swinger of birches.
~robert frost~
  #3  
Old Aug 11, 2008, 01:58 AM
Christina86's Avatar
Christina86 Christina86 is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Feb 2006
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 19,686
(((((((((((((insecurity)))))))))))))))

Sometimes if one experiences abuse as a younger person, we associate it with something we deserve (even unconsciously) and proceed to replay such patterns later in life. It's like trying to de-value what happened before, by creating a worse situation at the present ... but something under our own control, and not that of an abuser. So then we take on the guilt of what happened before, and the guilt of the present (and what we're doing to ourselves) and we wind up feeling worse - because that's what we feel we deserve. I hope that makes sense. You're not alone.

Past Abuse and Present Deviance? Keep talking, we're all listening.
__________________
Past Abuse and Present Deviance?
  #4  
Old Aug 11, 2008, 06:19 AM
Mouse_'s Avatar
Mouse_ Mouse_ is offline
Magnate
 
Member Since: Sep 2007
Location: Sch of hard knocks.
Posts: 2,179
Yes I think thats possible. For me personally, I've acted it out on myself more then acted it on society...and I think the "strange" sexual desires, are not that strange at all in the general population but its the "why" behind them that may differ, for me it was a way of trying to be in control of something I once wasn't in control off...therapy has helped me with these confusing issues.
__________________
Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished. If you're alive, it isn't. ~Richard Bach
  #5  
Old Aug 11, 2008, 11:07 PM
chaotic13's Avatar
chaotic13 chaotic13 is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Aug 2007
Posts: 3,747
I think I read somewhere that S&M fantasies are slightly more common in women who experienced sexual abuse. These are common thoughts/fantasies in non-abused people too and aren't necessarily abnormal. Also just thinking about being harmed or forced it doesn't mean that you will actually engage in these activities.
__________________
"Joy is your sole's knowledge that if you don't get the promotion, keep the relationship, or buy the house, it's because you weren't meant to.You're meant to have something better, something richer, something deeper, Something More." (Sara Ban Breathnach)
  #6  
Old Aug 12, 2008, 04:57 AM
multipixie9's Avatar
multipixie9 multipixie9 is offline
Magnate
 
Member Since: Jul 2008
Location: east of the sun, west of the moon
Posts: 2,259
This kind of important question can't be really answered by strangers in a forum.

I can say that childhood physical, sexual and emotional abuse had very bad effects on me and damaged the way I relate to people and how I feel about myself and about sexual intimacy.

Any person who has been raped will have some pain and issues to deal with. Rape is a terrible violation of ones trust and ones very being. It is horrible.

I'm sorry this happened to you and I hope you can find the help and healing you undoubtedly need. I'm not sure if anyone can get through such pain all by themselves. I know I've needed some counseling help and some support from others. Doing things to pursue healing has helped me get better from my painful past.

Leslie
__________________
HEALING HAPPENS
  #7  
Old Aug 12, 2008, 06:21 AM
Mouse_'s Avatar
Mouse_ Mouse_ is offline
Magnate
 
Member Since: Sep 2007
Location: Sch of hard knocks.
Posts: 2,179
</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
multipixie9 said:
This kind of important question can't be really answered by strangers in a forum.


</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">
Oh I think it can be discussed and I think even strangers can relate if they have had the same life experiences? They maybe strangers in as much as we dont know the person, but we can share the pain and experience, don't you think?
__________________
Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished. If you're alive, it isn't. ~Richard Bach
  #8  
Old Aug 13, 2008, 10:05 AM
RozG RozG is offline
Account Suspended
 
Member Since: Feb 2008
Location: U.K.
Posts: 6,767
</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
insecurity said:
Does anyone think past physical abuse growing up and being raped by a friend as a teenager could lead someone do desire being physically hurt and abused as an adult and also lead to strange sexual desires that normal people might not have? I'm so confused. Past Abuse and Present Deviance?

insecuity

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Hi insecurity

I can only answer this question from a personal point of view, from my own experience of being abused as a child and a teen.

For me personally the answer is yes....i have always been drawn to relationships where i will be physically and sexually abused, or where the man will make sadistic sexual demands....while always shying from men who were soft and gentle etc.

I have to say though....that is just me and NOT everyone who grew up being abused reacts in that way.

I hope i have not offended anyone here with this reply, and i hope it was of some help to you.

Peace, love and care,
roz
xx
  #9  
Old Aug 13, 2008, 04:10 PM
insecurity's Avatar
insecurity insecurity is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jul 2007
Location: Virginia
Posts: 40
(((Everyone)))

Thanks for all of your replies. I gues I just wanted to see if anyone else felt like this of if it there was just something wrong with me....beyond everything else. Thanks for the responses!

insecurity
Reply
Views: 654

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.



Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
when the past.. is the present... freewill Survivors of Abuse 6 Jul 03, 2008 01:58 AM
Past and Present~ SweetSunshine Psychotherapy 5 Mar 08, 2007 12:15 PM


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 12:10 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.