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#1
Dec 26, 2004, 12:55 AM
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I am a cutter as a result of my stepmother and her idea of treating people. I wasnt hit all the time or anything, but I was constantly screamed at and accused and punished for things I never did. My T, my family, and most of my friends all say I was abused. But, when people say that stuff it really bothers me. I don't understand it b/c I don't think I was "abused". She was mean most if the time (I was suicidal for a long period of time) but I just cant accept it when people say I was abused. I get physically sick to my stomach and really nervous. Then I get defensive. Someone please help me understand.
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schizoaffective bipolar type PTSD generalized anxiety d/o haldol, prazosin, risperdal and prn klonopin and helpful cogentin |
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#2
Dec 26, 2004, 01:41 AM
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from what ur saying i think ur in denial.. its normal to be in denial. it will make sense some day in the future. I was in denial for the longest time about SI. I scratch my self but if it didnt penitrate the skin its not SI.. I know now it was the begining.. But this works in a cycle denial if the first step of the cycle, then its acceptance, greif, and then healing... I think thats how it goes.. well if this sounds all mummbled up.. sorry really tired...
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#3
Dec 26, 2004, 02:44 AM
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well i lived w/ her for 10 yrs and just recently moved out 6 months ago. i am 17. i HATE going to my T!!!!!!
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schizoaffective bipolar type PTSD generalized anxiety d/o haldol, prazosin, risperdal and prn klonopin and helpful cogentin |
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#4
Dec 29, 2004, 11:35 AM
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I think that your responses are very understandable. Isn't it only human to avoid anything that triggers pain? By whatever term you want to call it, you've experienced some serious pain in your life. Talk to a licensed therapist/counselor about your past so that you can move on to a brighter future. You deserve it.
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#5
Dec 29, 2004, 04:07 PM
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i am currently in therapy for si and depression as well as dealing with my past experiences. thanks for answering
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schizoaffective bipolar type PTSD generalized anxiety d/o haldol, prazosin, risperdal and prn klonopin and helpful cogentin |
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#6
Dec 30, 2004, 01:42 AM
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Maybe you weren't physically abused Hallie but you felt ignored or neglected or were talked to angrily repeatedly. These things can be very upsetting.
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#7
Dec 31, 2004, 09:12 PM
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i felt like cinderella who could never do anything right and although i did like all the housework i was told i am lazy and a no good dumbass. my stepmom really hates me and i am unsure why but i do know i am glad i did not commit suicide-heaven knows how many times i wanted to when i was living with her.
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schizoaffective bipolar type PTSD generalized anxiety d/o haldol, prazosin, risperdal and prn klonopin and helpful cogentin |
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#8
Dec 31, 2004, 10:14 PM
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(((HALLIE)))) In some ways you are ahead of me... the part of being glad you didn't commit suicide is such a good place to be! I, am not there yet... that you didn't let the actions of someone else cause you to do that is remarkable.
 Please come back often and post... it's a great support site!
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#9
Dec 31, 2004, 10:58 PM
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i hope you have a wonderful 2005 and keep coming here because you'll find lots of help here with people that have experienced similiar things. everyone here is kind and caring. pat
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#10
Jan 01, 2005, 02:44 AM
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thank u guys u don't know how much ur words mean to me. thanks-god bless
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schizoaffective bipolar type PTSD generalized anxiety d/o haldol, prazosin, risperdal and prn klonopin and helpful cogentin |
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