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#1
May 02, 2009, 01:48 PM
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dont read if you're upset by anger
.. "mother's day", ****ing mother's day and hearing people talk about "a mother's love" and "a mother's touch" yeah, that's we she called them too, but they felt sick and dirty and hearing all those ******* words, seeing the day printed on every ****ing calender, "buy your mum something for this mother's day!" on the damn television, "just over a week to go!" just thinking about that ***** makes me so damn angry, it used to just make me sad, but remember enough and i see how she deserved to die just as much as my ****ing father keep talking about this in therapy, why do we have to talk about that *****, i detest her and thinking about her, talking about her, she doesn't deserve to be remembered, hell would be too good for her hate this bloody month, hate it 
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#2
May 02, 2009, 01:55 PM
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It sounds like such a hard time for you....I hope you get to a place where this time isn't so hard for you. We're here for you, when you need to vent or need support.
__________________
Don't follow the path that lies before you. Instead, veer from the path - and leave a trail... 
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 Anonymous29346
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#3
May 02, 2009, 01:57 PM
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(((((( Griffe ))))))
  Keep talking about it in therapy, yes because that anger needs to come out. Needs to set free. You've held that anger in for years and years because you had to. It's safe for it to be expressed now. Feels scary but once you let that anger out you can breathe again. Healing.
__________________
 Pegasus Got a quick question related to mental health or a treatment? Ask it here General Q&A Forum “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein |
| Anonymous29346, Catherine2
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#4
May 02, 2009, 02:02 PM
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(((((((( Griffe ))))))))))
__________________
Life shouldn't be this hard . 
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| Anonymous29346
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#5
May 02, 2009, 04:29 PM
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Griffe, I had to struggle with Mother's Day too. I bought her a card the other day. I kept looking and looking for an appropriate card. They all said all of this "your the best", etc., blah, blah, blah, and I thought "I'm never going to find a card that is 'appropriate' for her". Finally, under an area where a person can find a card for someone who isn't their mother I found a card that just said "Happy Mother's Day".
Yes, I don't feel bad anymore about the fact that I don't really celebrate Mother's Day. The hand that I was dealt is just a fact now. I'm sorry that you are struggling. You have every right to be angry. Keep working...................
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ Last edited by Sannah; May 02, 2009 at 08:26 PM. |
| Anonymous29346, Catherine2
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#6
May 02, 2009, 06:21 PM
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Griffe,
Your feelings are understandable and I'm glad you are able to share them here. Getting them out is one of the most beautiful gifts you can give to yourself. It's so terribly hard trying to ride these things out. Jme, but I felt the same way about any celebration about both of my parents. They were not my abusers; they abdicated their responsibilities towards me and let me fend for myself. Much of the bitterness has been left behind, but I had to face it before I could do anything about it. Yeah, it was painful and I hated every minute of talking about it. It was also one of the best things I ever did for myself. Catherine
__________________
The Most Dangerous Enemy Is The One In Your Head Telling You What You Do and Don't Deserve... |
| Anonymous29346
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#7
May 03, 2009, 04:47 PM
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god do i wish i could call my therapist right now
wouldnt mind putting my fist through the ****ing wall  distracting isnt a good enough distraction sad, angry, lonely, what a ****ing fun cycle |
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#8
May 03, 2009, 04:58 PM
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For the anger -
1) Write it out, draw, paint, sometimes it's easier to let it out in a painting. Many famous artists had mental health problems that's why they are so good at it! 2) Punch a pillow, draw a face on the pillow if it helps. 3) Fling a wet dish cloth around, makes a lovely splatt on the wall, just make sure there is not too much water in it! 3) Do some sort of exercise, get outside if you can and really focus on everything around you. 4) Breathe! Slow the breathing down by placing your hand on your stomach, breathe in 1-2, breathe out 1-2, do this for at least ten minutes. Hugs (((((((((((( Griffe )))))))))))))) 
__________________
Pegasus Got a quick question related to mental health or a treatment? Ask it here General Q&A Forum “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein |
| Catherine2
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#9
May 03, 2009, 05:00 PM
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I agree with Pegasus's ideas
Personally, I've never felt good hitting things (especially when I was a kid and thought everything had feelings, even pillows and stuffed animals and stuff) but I find creativity is the best outlet for me (and it happens to be my only method that isn't self destructive  ) even if it's something simple like writing how you feel as graphically as you see fit, and then deleting it if you don't feel like sharing.
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| Catherine2
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#10
May 03, 2009, 09:26 PM
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__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
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#11
May 05, 2009, 10:16 AM
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((( pegasus ))) i drew a face on a spare pillow in sharpie and when i'm angry i go beat it up, thank you for the advice, it does help
angry, anxious, sad, snapped at people i shouldn't have in my ****** mood although they were being assholes... i don't think people get how hard i have to try to NOT be aggressive (drives me crazy that the aggressive mood thing on pc only has one g...) taunting and pissing off someone who normally hides anger is not a brilliant idea, god did they look confused when i snapped  ****ing angry and trying my best to not be angry and god the things i wish i could type right now but i'll just leave it at should probably go hang out in a corner now dont want to snap on here  can someone just wake me up when it's next week? 
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#12
May 05, 2009, 12:43 PM
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Griffe, can you talk to your therapist about your anger?
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
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#13
May 05, 2009, 01:34 PM
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yeh. and i do. it helps a bit. don't have therapy today though.
but whatever. i'll go throw my pillow across the room, pretend i'm right as rain, play a couple of games and have a conversation with the wall since showing anger irl only leads to trouble, walls always seem to listen, and hey, if i get angry, i can always punch it. shattering my fist always somehow makes me feel better. ****ed up. |
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#14
May 05, 2009, 02:02 PM
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(((Griffe)))
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#15
May 05, 2009, 09:18 PM
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Griffe, I am so happy that you are talking to your T about your anger. I am sorry that you are angry........
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
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#16
May 06, 2009, 10:29 AM
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...................
Last edited by Anonymous29346; May 06, 2009 at 11:29 AM. Reason: like it's important |
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#17
May 06, 2009, 11:37 AM
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   .gif "Sad Boy")
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#18
May 06, 2009, 11:40 AM
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sit here because no one else can hear the screaming see im bleeding because this **** wont stop
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#19
May 06, 2009, 11:55 AM
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(((((((((Griffe)))))))))
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
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#20
May 06, 2009, 12:11 PM
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stupid
ugly worthless scummy dirty idiotic childish lonely sad angry unhelpful hideous hurt bleeding friendless screaming VINCE having the most ****ed up day ever and pretendign im okay people dont care about vince 
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#21
May 06, 2009, 12:18 PM
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Griffe, I am sorry that you are struggling so. Is something triggering the thoughts that you are having about yourself today? A lot of what you wrote are feelings: lonely, sad, angry, hurt. I am sorry that you think that no one cares about you. I know that I do
...........
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
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#22
May 06, 2009, 12:32 PM
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everyone is screaming inside
and they never all shut up and my fist is all mangled up haha no one cares i just hide it behind my back and no one notices someone comes in to check on me and doesnt see anything wrong is the world blind because no one wants to see and my dog got hit by a car i got told that this morning and no one cares 'boo hoo your dog died who cares' see with dogs they have this thing called loyalty which people dont have and my dog always listened when i was at home and never bit me never ran away never made fun of me always came and sat next to me when i cried unlike people people say they care pretend to appreciate you pretend that you 'matter' but nooooo the second things get tough they drop you no matter how much you can try to help them they don't give a rat's *** about me and now my ****ing dog is dead who i hadn't seen in a couple of weeks because i havent been home to visit and that dog was great better then all the ****ed up people who smile to my face and stab a ******* dagger into my back so sit here alone stare at my fist isnt it all so pathetic what a ****ed up week everyone is yelling inside vince vince vince switchy flashy ****ED UP ugly worthless vince thats who i am  
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#23
May 06, 2009, 12:36 PM
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I am so very truly sorry about you dog.
Pets are not just.... as people can be JUST....... |
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#24
May 06, 2009, 12:41 PM
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Griffe, no wonder you are upset! I am so sorry about your dog! He does sound like a wonderful dog to sit next to you when you are upset and everything.
When is your appt with your T? Does anyone know about your dog where you are at?
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
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#25
May 06, 2009, 12:43 PM
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((((((((((vince))))))))))))) so sorry about your dog
__________________
  
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