Dealing with a stalker in the workplace

Hi everyone! I've never posted in a forum before. I'm wondering if anyone has been in the same boat as me. I don't know anyone who has had a similar experience and I am left feeling alone and beyond anxious. I have a stalker at work. This man is about twice my age and expressed romantic interest in me. I repeatedly told him I wasn't interested. He stalked me on social media, and created new accounts when I blocked him. He waited for me in the parking lot at work multiple times. He showed up at my home and brought me gifts like wine, chocolate, and stuffed animals. I repeatedly told him to leave me alone, even screaming at him at work. I told union stewards, they told him to leave me alone but he did not. I told HR, they told him to leave me alone but he did not. It got so bad that it impacted my ability to perform my job. I work around heavy machinery that is incredibly dangerous. I started to feel panicky one day when he was following me around at work. I threw up twice and went home. I continued to throw up multiple times a day for several weeks and left work on short term disability. I lost a ton of weight and couldn't even drive myself to doctor appointments. I jumped at every noise, thinking he was back at my house. I got a a No Contact/No Stalking order against him that is in place for 2 years. He is not supposed to come within 200 feet of me. I was diagnosed with PTSD by a psychiatrist and continue to experience severe psychosomatic symptoms of headache and nausea. I am supposed to return to work in 2 weeks and the stalker still works there, in the same department as me. HR will not tell me what measures are in place to keep him away. I'm terrified that I will be in the exact same boat I was in when I left work: constantly looking over my shoulder, avoiding him at all costs, and getting physically ill. Has anyone ever experienced a stalker in the work place? I'm worried I'm going to have to quit and I'll lose everything.

With all the documentation and steps you've taken to complain and keep him away, any attorney would be GLAD to take on a lawsuit on your behalf without a retainer (probably taking a percentage on the back end).

Gather your documents and contact any employment rights attorney.

I'm new to the forums too. The first thought that came to mind is Sexual Harassment. You need to talk to HR and your Union about this more. This man is creep-***, especially when he knows you have told everyone what hes doing and he continues. Be careful.

This definitely sounds like a possible legal matter, can you take advice?

Sorry you are going through this.

I think I'd go back to the Police & ask them for some more help too. I agree with going down the legal route too. Your employer has a duty of care over all their employees. I think you should go back to your GP & get another sickness certificate. You cannot possibly function at work properly or safely until this situation is resolved. Please don't leave your work. This is wrong & not your fault.

Thank you everyone for your suggestions. I have been keeping a log of all events related to this in case it becomes a legal matter. I definitely don't feel like I will be going back to work in a good environment. I work in a place that is like a "boys club" and a number of these guys have accused me of making these things up, although I have nothing to gain by doing that, and I have concrete evidence. The judge listened to my account of events as well as the stalker's account and he concluded that this man was "dangerously obsessed" with me. Those were the judge's words. And yet work has done nothing. Just thinking about it makes me feel like I'm going to throw up. My short term disability is only about half of what I normally make but none of my expenses are halved so now there are financial worries on top of everything else. I don't want to quit my job, but I feel like it's going to come to that. I don't know if the company just doesn't want to fire him or the union protection is saving his job. It's just so frustrating. They say sexual harassment will not be tolerated, but then they tolerate it.

Why won't hr tell you what is in place for when you return? I don't like this. This does not sound emotionally safe for you. I understand the need to work though, and to support yourself. I hope you will be ok. Is it possible to find a different job? My thoughts are with you.

I got a call from work today. I have to have a "psychiatric evaluation" prior to being allowed to go back to work. OK. I work in a very special field that has huge public safety ramifications if something were to go wrong. The company doesn't want to take a chance on someone making an error because of mental illness/issues/distractions. I can actually understand that. But what I cannot for the life of me understand is why the stalker, with a court order against him, did not also get a mandatory psychiatric evaluation. I am to be evaluated because a coworker-turned-stalker's actions made me incredibly afraid for my safety. But he does not need his mental state evaluated when he thinks it's OK to stalk and harass women at home and at work. How is this OK??? Futhermore, I'm terrified of this interview. My whole career rests on what this one individual doctor says. A doctor contracted by a company who is pretty upset about the waves that I have created by bringing sexual harassment charges against a man in their good ol' boys club. I have hardly eaten today, I've been taking anti-nausea meds like candy, and I have been having panic attacks. Everything about this situation feels wrong.

I published a book & legal training manual on this topic in 2009. Your employer is currently in violation of the law. You need to contact a worker's rights attorney TODAY. Given my experience in the field, if what you are saying is all factual, you could be in serious danger. Stalkers do not just stop "because someone told them to." They continue and they escalate. Your workplace is in violation of the law if they continue to employ this individual and he comes within 200 feet of you on their property. You ABSOLUTELY have a legal claim against them. You need to hire an attorney, who needs to draft a letter to your employer explaining the situation and demanding that this individual no longer work on the same premises as you. The second your employer hires their own attorney, they will be advised to comply IMMEDIATELY. You also need to contact the police and inform them that this individual still works at the same place you do and is violating the restraining order by coming within 200 feet of you (assuming he has done so after the order went into effect). I don't want to frighten you any more than you already are, but this is serious. This cannot continue to go on.

Thank you for this reply! I am definitely frightened. The judge who granted the permanent No Stalking Order said that he thought this man was "dangerously obsessed" and that he would never stop seeking me out. He said he shuddered to think what would happen if I tried to go back to work without an order of protection. So that is exactly what I'm trying to do now: go back to work with an order of protection against a co-worker in the same department. HR has stressed that the onus is on the stalker to stay away from me. I believe their plan is to just hope that he doesn't cross paths with me but I will likely have a meeting with them next week as I return to work on Tuesday. They would not give me any information in writing prior to my return. I do have an attorney because the stalker fought the order of protection and got his own attorney. My lawyer is very interested in the way my company has (or hasn't) handled this matter. Do you know what the rule is for violating a No Stalking order? Like if this guy comes around a corner and I'm standing there, do I immediately call the police or do I only call if he doesn't immediately leave?

you should use a ipad i think they are called or iphone and tape it when he comes near you, just a suggestion, and as he probably will try to get near you(not to scare you) but you will have actual footage of him doing so. i feel for your situation and wish you luck.

Is your lawyer an employment law attorney? If not, you also need an employment law attorney. Your company is in violation of the law by continuing to employ him in the same building. And yes, if he do much as bumps into you in the corner, call thyour police. Then file another complaint with HR. Then call your employment law attorney. But, honestly, the company should fire him before you go back to work. I don't know what your lawyer is doing, but he or she is not doing a competent job if this guy is still employed there. It's a MASSIVE lawsuit waiting to happen. I would also probably initiate a lawsuit right now against your employer for negligence and unsafe working conditions and intentional infliction of emotional distress. Just imitating the lawsuit should be enough to get them to fire this guy. But you need an employment law attorney, not just any attorney.

This is a really frustrating situation, because a lot of things that seem very wrong actually don't seem to be illegal in this case. I talked to a police officer in my state and he said that it is not a violation of the no stalking order if the guy comes within 200 feet of me but then leaves. My attorney is not an employment lawyer, but he deals with a lot of crime victims. Before I found him, I talked to several lawyers who said that I did not have a case because I was not fired from my job. That seemed ridiculous then and it still does now. The attorney I'm working with now did an excellent job representing me with the No Stalking Order and he wants to see what my company does now that I'll be going back to work this week. I've already had several co-workers unfriend me on facebook and before I left on Short Term Disability, only one person even said hello to me. Thats what happens when you take a fellow union member to HR, even when that person is dangerous. This week doesn't seem like it will be a very good week and I can't take any medication at work so I'm expecting my anxiety to skyrocket. I just wish I felt safe at my job.