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#1
Nov 17, 2011, 10:53 PM
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A couple years ago, my mom had back surgery (lumbar facet). She started pain management which included a host of medications. Last year, she underwent a spinal cord simulator implantation that is supposed to relieve some of her back pain.
Now, she's on MScontin 30mg 3x day - lortab 10 2x day, flexeril, SOMA, neurontin, celexa, welbutrin, klonopin, and a good many others, but these are the depressants. It is obvious to my entire family that she has some type of emotional relationship with her pills. They are causing her to age - I barely recognize her anymore, physically and mentally. She has become withdrawn and depressed in the past six months or so. She's honestly lost her mind and I don't know how to help her. She exaggerates her pain - fact not opinion. She can't see past her own misery and is creating a negative environment for my bro and sis who still live there. I've lost my mom to pills. We have talked to her, intervened, cut off any enabling...what the hell else is there to do? I'm desperate to have just some of the mom that I used to have. I'm afraid talking to her doc would either make her suicidal, or he'd call me a liar because she has him so wrapped and fooled. She makes no sense anymore. What can I do to help? I'm open to all suggestions. |
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#2
Nov 17, 2011, 11:26 PM
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Is there a single doctor who has prescribed all of these medications? And are they coming out of a single pharmacy?
If not, you can begin making each doctor & each pharmacy aware of the others. If there's over-prescribing going on, they may sort themselves out. But if it's one doctor, one pharmacy, I don't know that you have much recourse beyond appealing to the doctor.
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roads & Charlie |
 Ygrec23
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#3
Nov 17, 2011, 11:45 PM
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#4
Nov 18, 2011, 04:58 AM
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It does seem like she's on a lot of medication BUT -- being a chronic pain patient myself, I understand why she's aging. Chronic pain is VERY difficult to live with and if you don't have it yourself, there is NO WAY you can understand what it does to you. Very seldom does a chronic pain patient become addicted to their mediations. A very SMALL percentage of people do.
Just because she has a spinal cord stimulator doesn't mean that her pain IS reduced. I had one too, and it didn't seem to help at all. The stimulator works for NERVE pain, not for mechanical pain so if she has that kind of pain too, it's not being relieved. I've been a chronic painer for over 25 years, and my kids tell me that I've aged alot in the last few years. That's because the pain has taken a huge toll on me. No, I do not abuse my meds -- I take them only as prescribed --- but fighting pain 24/7 is difficult. You may be completely correct in that your Mom is possibly mis-using her medications -- but try to see the other side of it too. Chronic pain is emotionally and physically difficult and some people don't cope with it well. I wish you the very best and you're all in my prayers. God bless. Hugs, Lee |
| gma45
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#5
Nov 18, 2011, 02:27 PM
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I'm assuming you are still functioning and coherent - you seem to put words together without too much problem, but she can't even speak an intelligible sentence. I'm just worried that one day, because of these meds, she's not going to wake up. She is addicted - there is no way around that. I've seen what happens when she misses a day or two of Lortab and she's like a nervous crack addict. I've been addicted before and I know what it looks like. She is textbook addicted. Last edited by aries2217; Nov 18, 2011 at 02:32 PM. Reason: had more to add |
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#6
Nov 18, 2011, 03:26 PM
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Not all medications are addictive...is there a way to talk to the Dr. and change meds so that they are effective as well as non-addictive? For example, Vicodin is addictive, but darvocet is not. I took care of an old lady who had chronic pain and was addicted to vicodin. We switched her over to darvocet but it wasn't easy...it took time and she wasn't happy about it. Not sure what you can really do for your mom, I'm sorry I don't have anything else helpful to say. Good luck!
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#7
Nov 18, 2011, 03:45 PM
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Aries, your and your mom's situations sound just terrible. Have you yet had an interview with her GP? Has your mom signed a HIPAA waiver in your favor (so her doc can talk to you)? Are you convinced that this GP really has a handle on your mom's drug problems? Simply from the number of drugs he's prescribed for her it sounds as if he/she's in a way sympathetic with her pain. Would you want to try a different GP who could attempt to wean her off some of these pills? You wouldn't, of course, want to switch to a doctor who really didn't sympathize with her difficulties. Just someone who might be able to minimize the drug intake. At that same time, if you made clear to her present GP that you were seriously concerned about her drug intake, he/she might well respond appropriately. A long talk with her present GP is really square one, I would think. You may have done that already. Yes/no?
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We must love one another or die. W.H. Auden We must love one another AND die. Ygrec23  |
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#8
Nov 20, 2011, 06:10 AM
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Hi I would like to put my two cents in this. Hows her appetite? I to have a spinal cord stimulator. At times I get frustrated with it in fact had it shut off for awhile.Now use it off and now. I too took my meds as prescribed But I always was asking did I take my meds yet? My hubby would say yes dear. than go to my Dr and say you have to increase my meds i'm in a lot of pain and so on and so on.We can go endless with these.I was on opana (oxy morphine) I was on morphine I was on klonpin, welburtin. You name it and my pain was a monster. My family new I was wasting away and so did I. Went to rehab a good one that specialized in chronic pain and realized I didn't need all those.....For those here that know me new the agony and pain I was in...At rehab I would always say but I only took them as prescribed over and over......And they would say right heard that one before. I begin to realize that was indeed true. I could not have a productive life on all that medication. I think it's like the mind playing tricks on me . Some of the meds were before the spinal cord stimulator I have nerve damage so badly I had to get the stimulator readjusted at the manufacturer to a lower tone. When that was done I had a better time with it. My pain doc always offered me meds...powerful meds...addicting meds...after 5 months I was hooked and out of sorts I had to go to the Treatment Center in Lake Worth, FL for 30 days to get off of them. My doc had no system for taking me off the meds or to deal with the withdrawls. I wanted off of them...my decision ( and a wise one ). At one time during the meds I had periods of fainting, never getting out of bed. Currently I am on non-addictive meds and sometimes I wish I was back on them. I feel like I'm addicted to the neuroton because of a lot of pain, so I want to take more. Oh i'm on the lidoderm patches to now and I tend to abuse them to cause my pain is so bad. This is just how my body works for me. Keep us posted good luck.
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#9
Nov 20, 2011, 01:24 PM
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The part about taking the meds as precribed is an all too familiar phrase of defense from her...Thank you for this post. I applaud your strength and please don't give up. |
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#10
Nov 20, 2011, 01:28 PM
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#11
Nov 21, 2011, 01:49 PM
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Dear Ares,
Please do not assume that your mother's problem is opiate addiction. The Flexeril, Soma, Klonopin combination can be quite debilitating. These medications are given as muscle relaxants, however, both Soma and Klonopin are tranquilizers. Klonopin is very much like the tranquilizer Valium, and Soma is metabolized into an old-school tranquilizer (named Miltown) that has not been available by Rx for over 20 years because of its toxic side effects. Flexeril is a strong anticholinergic agent that also causes drowsiness, dry mouth, and disorientation in many. It is chemically similar to another old-school class of medication that effects the autonomic nervous system known as a tricyclic antidepressant. Tricyclics are used to treat pain by some doctors, but generally they cause too many nasty side-effects in the population. They react strongly with alcohol, and if your mother enjoys even a couple of glasses of wine in the evening while taking this medication, it can very well create a situation where she would be reluctant to awaken. Many doctors consider opiate use safer for the treatment of chronic pain, even with their potential for abuse, to the use of these types of medications I've discussed because of their side effects. I would suggest that your mother's doctors explore reducing or eliminating these three medications, especially the Klonopin, if your mother is have problems with extreme drowsiness. There are now alternative muscle relaxants that do not effect the central nervous system, but work directly on the muscle fiber. A good spinal surgeon may choose to use something like dantrolene (Dantrium), which is an effective muscle relaxant, but has no neurological side-effect. As far as pain control goes, the daily 90mg dose of morphine with Lortab prn are well within norms for patients with moderate to severe pain. People with pain are not debilitated by strong opiates like so-called normal people, for a number of reasons, which I will not explore here. Please talk with your mother's pain specialist about this. You describe a syndrome that sounds more like chronic depression than addiction. Spinal surgery, implants, and chronic pain for patients who do not consider themselves elderly can ruin their quality of life. No one handles disability at any age without undergoing the process of loss. Perhaps grief counseling, as well as therapy with a chronic pain psychologist is better suited to her condition than Welbutrin or SSRI therapy? One key to managing chronic pain is change. Patients who suffer from disabling chronic pain require constant evaluation and adjustment of therapy. If a therapy doesn't work, move on to something else. If a doctor is unable to find the proper answers for your mother's various syndromes, find another. These days, some doctors who practice in this particular area have dual specialties in both spinal surgery and pain management. See if you can find one in your area if you are not satisfied after speaking with your mother's doctors. The American Pain Society can also help you find resources to help you manage this condition. Google their website for more information. Finally, I appreciate your interest in your mother's care, and I encourage you to follow this up with an open mind. Most people jump to the conclusion that the opiate medication is the problem because of our conditioning from the so-called war on drugs, however, many prescription medications are disabling. The variety of pills you describe would knock anyone down. Read and learn about the interactions of these medications so that you can talk with doctors about these things. Learn to read drug inserts and ask questions if you don't understand what you're reading. Don't accept simple answers to your questions like: that's a muscle relaxant. Ask, how does it work? How does it interact or potentiate the opiate medication? Why does she need three muscle relaxants? Etc. I know that doctors hate this kind of questioning, but never forget that the patient is essentially responsible for their own health. It sounds to me like you are considering taking up the banner for your mother's well being. I support you in this and encourage you to learn all you can about the medications she is being prescribed. Good luck. Last edited by mtnview; Nov 21, 2011 at 02:01 PM. |
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#12
Nov 22, 2011, 12:27 PM
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I'm well aware of the effects and indications of the medications she is on. I know she has an opiate addiction, and if it were just that, I'd probably be okay with it. It is the Soma, Flexeril, and Klonopin. Theses are great meds, I've been on all of them before (not all at once) and I am still on Klonopin for the wretched anxiety I suffer from.
I know she has an emotional connection to these pills. She is depressed, but has refused treatment time and time again. She has even seen firsthand how therapy can help someone (she took me for YEARS) and I am in a much better place. She told me the other day that she feels she has no one to talk to and I don't doubt it. She has alienated everyone so much because she creates these scenarios in her mind that don't make any sense and tries to turn me and my siblings against each other - she has a brand new grand baby and she seems like she doesn't care that it is even on this earth. She's so selfish, she can't see beyond what is in it for her. Sorry to rant, but she is ruining herself. Her pain management doc is no doubt a great physician, but I feel that she is manipulating him better than she manipulates us. She is so negative, I just want to shake her and scream. I don't know anymore. |
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#13
Nov 22, 2011, 02:24 PM
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I hear your frustration, loud and clear. This is not a forum for me to offer anything but opinion, so please consider the following to be simply that -- my respectful opinion. May I suggest that your mother is experiencing severe loss. What you describe sounds very much like she is lost within the grieving process described by Kubler-Ross (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance). In such cases, a good grief counselor is often the quickest way to help one through this nightmare. The manipulation of physician(s) complicates matters. A review of her medications seems a reasonable request, though as you realize, may cause resentment. Still, I think confiding in her physicians is a good idea. You are that proverbial space described as 'between a rock and hard place.' There is no answer that will not, initially, create friction. So, you may have to think beyond the initial unpleasantness your interaction may cause. You may recall from your own therapy the concept of 'hitting bottom.' This is a difficult process to watch in loved ones. Again, keep your vision on the future, and be clear in your goals. Dysfunction in any aspect is a social/family issue. When one falls into the depths, the reverberations are felt by all who are near. Please remember to take care of yourself during this challenging time, which coincidentally, is that certain time of year when family is supposed to come together in love and gratitude. Although the timing of your urge to act is poignantly appropriate, dealing with sorrow when it seems the rest of the world is celebrating can only make your task more of a burden. You may have also learned in therapy the simple mathematics of helping another who has fallen. When we attempt to 'fill the hole' in another's life, we often have to give up something of ourselves as fill material. Take care of yourself. I wish you inspiration and peace. --M |
| aries2217
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#14
Nov 23, 2011, 03:01 PM
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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