[madisgram]

when i was struggling to get sober but in denial at the same time i used all kinds of means that would allow me to drink successfully. i did not want to admit defeat. i wasn't content with being labled an alcoholic. in my heart tho I KNEW that was what i WAS. so periodically i threw "temper tantrums". my results will be revealed.
my justifications": i just wanted to be "normal". afterall my friends could drink so why shouldn't i? why did i have to be punished for my drinking? and so i would drink again. had i been a friend i would've asked them, "what part of this do you not understand?"

some ways i did "controlled" drinking (by the way i thought i had "invented" this concept):
1. only drink from thursday till sunday. this got moved up to wednesday, then tuesday and then what the hell i'll just drink like i want to. that was every day.
2. not drink while doing a household chore. i would do the chore then 'reward" myself with a drink.
3. only allow myself to have 2 drinks per hour! i counted the minutes.
4. minimized the quantity of how much i drank.
5. eating out did not count towards how much i drank. it was a freebie.
6. purchase only a pint and that was my limit per day so i better stretch it out.
7. drinking beer instead of scotch my drink of choice. (BTW i hated beer)...ad nauseum.
8. and lastly, going to only 2 different liquor stores (every other day/rotating to get the pint. god forbid the clerk would think i was an alcoholic!! i mean "i didn't go there every day.") so each day i had to purchase a pint thinking this would embarress me enough at the liquor store to make me stop drinking!
my tally card: absolutely no success in using these methods. it was too much like a job! throw in the towel and just drink like i wanted to i'd say...from when i got up til when i went to bed (aptly called "passing out").

would anyone else care to share their "successful" drinking story? Give examples of

how you tried to limit or control the amount of alcohol or drugs you used by

limiting the time for drinking/drugging (for instance, decided not to drink before a certain hour in the day) ETC.
And what were your results?

(sorry for the long post)

[splitimage]

Augh Madisgram, your list made me smile. I tried most of them.

But probably my most stupid attempts at "limiting" my drinking where when I'd started to try to stop drinking and would get some sober time and then relapse. I never thought I could have just one. I knew that was out of the picture, so I'd try to limit the binge. I'd go out and buy 2 1 litre bottles of whiskey and a bottle of wine, and plan on drinking 24/7 for "just" 3 days, interspurrsed of course by passing out. However sometime on the third day I'd come to, and realize I was out of booze, and that I needed more, so I'd throw on some old sweat, and drive drunk, I'm embarrassed to say, to McDonalds, to get some food as I hadn't eaten in three days, then onto the liquor store for more booze, so I could continue drinking. I wouldn't stop until around day 6 or 7 when I was physically too sick to continue anymore. I truly hope those days are behind me.

splitimage

[Edge11]

...Hi madisgram...

...Great post...

...Been there done all of that...I was a pinter too and your right...It was a lot of work and worry keeping myself drunk...There's no such thing as control drinking for this Alkie...

[Perna]

I watched the National Geographic "Taboo" show on "Booze" last night, was extremely interesting, coming at it from lots of different perspectives (very scary/triggering watching the 14 year olds in Norway getting drunk though):

http://www.fhi.no/eway/default.aspx?...1:5977:1:::0:0

http://video.nationalgeographic.com/...booze-preview/

[backsters12]

So glad I found this post, blessings to all. 55 disabled lpn, single, alone, no booze no meds 18 months, first aa meeting i went to and listened I knew I was home and no longer lonely, I belonged. Every person that shared, said a part of my story. Was under psch care most of my life, no meds for it until 07 when i had a seizure from drinking too much and bit most of my tongue off. so then i was on about 6 differnt meds but i did not drink, up until 2010 my i went to visit my 30 year old and she told me what a loser i was etc etc. so i said to myself, well i will show her and went out and got my case of beer, yes everyone beer was my choice and a case a day, so i started showin her drinking a case a day, 2 weeks into it she realized i was drinking and on all the meds, so her answer was to take my money and buy a one way ticket back to pa knowing that i had given up my home and gave every thing away, so i had no where to go when i went back to pa, so one of my many sisters said i could stay at her place and she has the 24 7 party house whatever you want etc. so she gave me a corner and a small bed. i continued to drink and takes meds for the next 6 months every day, did not eat, and the next thing i know i wake up and was told that i died and all my organs were dead!!!! there was my entire family all my freinds etc., that was jan 23 2011, it was then i took charge of my life, for the first time, went to a great medical center because of the liver and kidneys and it was also spritual and rehab in philadelphia, i was there for 2 months, so my journey has begun and it keeps getting better everyday, hard work trying to take care of me, what is that i take care of everybody else, i wore i nuring uniform for 30 years what do i wear now, etc etc
i have learned i was a binge drinker, then of course it was every day, but then it got to the point i had to have it in my body or i would vomit and go in my pants, i needed to get down about 6 cans of beer to be able to walk to get another case and start all over again.
so for all the younger ones out there, do it now, do not wait until you are 55, also, as far a meds go i was labled bipolar szief all of it and what i have learned being clear headed i have fibromyglia and the weaterher congtrols me, pain so bad, but i am not in the same mood every day?????? blessings and prayers, i am new on this and learning my laptop to please excuse me for all the mess up's

[dizzyqueen]

Hi there it took me to loose everything i owned Alcohol did , i did not own the clothes on my back the shoes on my feet , i was staying in a Graveyard , Then after months begging going back to the graveyard, The Priest got me in hospital what a state i was in they got me cleaned up , then a chap came from AA he took me to meetings , i knew this sober life was for me , as they say i tried everything else , i was once a Chief Petty Officer in the Navy i had everything , but my best friend (booze) had finally let me down i would do anything to stay sober , and i did , September i shall be sober 25years , today i have a wife and 2 kids by the grace of God , a day at a time , i will never forget were i came from , today i enjoy life , yes i have Mental issues but thats life , this site helps me and its Members , God Bless All X....Bob

[tracist514]

I love when you post Madisgram! So glad I checked this out. I was famous for "limiting" amounts and days. I've even switched out what I'd drink thinking it would make a difference. Naturally none of that worked EVER. I also hated beer however I drank it anyway to avoid the hard stuff because "beer didn'tget me drunk or make me blackout". HA that's so far from the truth. I'd have so much it would just do the same as everything else I consumed. Also the last three years of my drinking history I was more of a binge drinker. So I thought it was okay to get wrecked once a month or every other week since I no longer drank everyday. It was certainly no different. And this pass year that once a month turned into 3-4 days a week. If I didn't start attending AA I would be right back where I left off. 7 days a week drinking whatever I could get my hands on, from vodka, Jack, Jager, beer, wine, etc etc. As long as I was numb that's all that mattered in the past. I'm so grateful to be out of that chaos. I wasted so much engery and money on this diease. I am thankfully to start my new life without it. Still just taking it one day at a time.

Again thank you for the thread!! I always enjoy what you share

[bluemountains]

Hi madisgram,
I stop in on this board occasionally because I know I belong here, but I am still in the denial stage or "I can make this work!" or poor, me, I got stuck with being bipolar, with having abusive parents who also abused substances, with dangerous behaviors, and on top of it all I am a substance abuser!
When I am here, I enjoy reading your posts because you are way beyond where I am now. Currently, I am trying to make myself think that I am not an alcoholic because I have no need to drink every day, and my drink of choice is wine, which everyone drinks. The problem, though, is that once I start drinking, I don't stop until whatever amount is around is gone. I drink alone because my friends know that I take meds that shouldn't mix with alcohol.
Anyway, I am working on it-hence, the occasional drop in to catch up on the posts.
Bluemountains

[Hellion]

Well interestingly enough I was pretty much a daily drinker for quite some time until pretty recently. I don't know that I was ever legitimately addicted to the crap but either way I saw enough of my family who drinks too much making asses of themselves while drunk.......so it burnt me out on it and I straight up stopped.

I have had a couple drinks here and there since, but that's it...just don't have it in me to drink so much anymore and though things still suck in my life and I still feel pretty screwed up mentally I feel less alcohol is a good thing for me.

I mean maybe its a temporary feeling, but I think I prefer drinking less...This is not to say I'm going sober though I still regularly use cannabis.

Hmm don't know if I really belong in this section of the site, but there is not a general substance use/self medication ect. section so I come here on occasion.