Drug problem

I was clean for 2 years and than just a week ago I went to my sister's and got back to smoking pot and drinking very heavly. I did this because I met a guy who introducted me back into that scene. I am now facing a hard choice either get clean or lose the love of my life for good. I am scared of my family finding out though. They think I am still clean. I know with me though if I don't get off the pot than I will go back to pills and it will get worse from there. This is my question for those of you who have faced a drug problem how did you kick it and did your family ever know? I am more worried about my mom finding out and kicking me out of her house.

I can't say I'm 100% clean and recovered from my own drugs/alcohol/sex addiction but I am on the long path to it. I tried AA and NA, did not find it helpful but I plan on going back to try again, you could try that.

I replaced my drug use with intense exercising and I quit a job I had that put me in the "drug and bar scene"
I tried to find hobbies to keep my hands busy, I was using meth for some time and my hands get jumpy when I crave so I found hobbies where I could use my hands.
I entered therapy and my T never told me to quit drugs but having his love and support gave me the push I needed to say enough is enough there is so much more to life than a pipe or a bottle or sex.
I lost a lot of friends when I quit drugs. Basically all of them but I work full time and go to college.

If you do not work get a job to keep you busy and help you feel needed and confident. The first step is deciding you want to walk away from drugs, once you've made the decision and you're sure about it- the only thing stopping you is you.

Is it possible to tell your family that you're using again, as a way of reaching out for support? If they are going to kick you out don't but if there's a family member or someone in your life who can hold your hand through this it would be a lot easier for you.

I feel your pain, I wish I knew a simple answer. Try to replace the bad habits and find a good T. If you're addicted go to a hospital or rehab center and detox but it sounds like you're just caught up in the beginning of this ****. Please back out before it gets worse you know it will if you don't.

Good luck
I'm sorry you have to go through this, **** sucks.

I am caught up in the start of this problem. I know though that if I don't get help now though that will get out of control. I have talked to someone at the place where I see my T and they are going to work with my case worker to get me in a group that will help me get better. I am not going to let the love of my life slip away again. We broke up in February but we have been talking about getting back together but he has done said til I get clean again he will not take me back. He said if I don't get clean again he will walk away for good and I am not willing to let that happen. I texted him and told him I will do anything to prove to him that I am getting clean again even if that means talking random drug test until he feels he can trust me again. My mom for sure would kick me out she smokes pot but knows with me it doesn't stop with pot it goes into pill use. I am not willing to go back down that path. I kicked the addiction as a senior in high school and got around my sister's friends and felt pressure to smoke again. It was the dumdest thing I could do.

How in a weeks time can you tell this is the "love of your life?" It sounds to me like he is just another one of our "drug playmates." If he TRULY cared for you, and knowing that you were clean, he would have done EVERYTHING in his power to see that you STAYED clean/sober!!! What he did was criminal in my book. Anyone who gets people hooked again knowing that they've been clean for a period of time is a NO GOOD CREEP. They just want someone to drug & drink with -- you really dont mean that much to him and I'm sorry to say that. he just wants a drugging friend.

Once you get clean/sober, he'll drop you like a slippery cup. Wait and see.

But you have GOT to get clean/sober. If you've been drinking heavily, I wish you could see my son. He's been fighting for his life for the last 2 months, after his liver quit working. And it's all due to alcohol. The liver now is working at about 20% but we know he's not going to live long.

PLEASE --- dont' become a statistic. Quit. You did it once and you can do it again. Go to AA and REALLY work the steps! Get a sponsor and work the program to the best of your ability! But get clean/sober. I don't want you to die. God bless. Hugs, Lee

One of the first surprises awaiting me when I sobered up (the 1st time, at age 35), was that pretty much everyone who knew me also knew I'd been drinking to some extent for the previous twentysomething years. I'm sure there was no time that my blood alcohol level wasn't measurable, and for a great portion of the latter half ... possibly not legal. People know. We think they don't, because we are impaired--and our perception of others is impaired.

What worries you most: (1) that your mom may kick you out the house? (2) that your boyfriend may walk away without giving you another chance? or (3) that you may already be unable to stop on your own?

I sense from your posts, brokenandalone, that you know how much trouble you're in & that only #3 on this list is seriously scary & could kill you. Please, please use that common sense I see you have going for yourself. Put ALL your focus on building a support team--your T, case worker, this group you found. Get involved in AA if possible, & find a sponsor. Emptty asked about telling your family, & I'm all for that once you have your program in place & functioning. Odds are your mom knows. Maybe once you have a sponsor, ask her to an open AA meeting. Just a suggestion.

If you will pour everything into regaining control of your addictions, brokenandalone, then once you're sober again & not worried about losing it all ... then mom and boyfriend will be there or not. They would have done what they would have done anyway ... people do. Your begging them wouldn't have changed anything--just wasted time you needed to spend on you.

Roadie

Sounds like you know what you need to do. Go to meetings, work the steps, and don't use or drink, period! All will be well if you just follow those three things! Don't beat yourself up for slipping we have all done it, just get back on and ride!

No the love of my life is not the one who got me hooked on the drugs. He is the one who is trying to get me off of them. He is the one who has said that if I don't get clean he will walk away for good. I have known the guy who is trying to get me clean for almost 3 years he is the love of my life not the giuy who got me hooked again. I walked away from the guy who got me hooked again.

the only person who can get you clean is yourself.
we use because we would rather be high than be sober.
eventually drugs will take you to jails, institutions or death.

going to NA meetings and working with your T re your addiction is a good combo. hope you will see this through and be well. any day sober is better than your best day high.
glad you posted. you already know what is best for you. yes, your mom knows or will know soon.

I want to update this story. I start a drug group on Wensday. It is a two hour group to teach people with mental illness how to cope without drugs. My ex fiance told me that this was my last chance. If I blow this chance he is going to walk away for good. Hearing him say this makes me want to get clean/sober even more. Like I said before he is the love of my life and the thought of losing him makes me cry so bad. His mother also said she would walk away if I didn't get clean/sober so I am doing this for them and myself. I have decided to throw myself into work and school to try to help me stay clean/sober. I have also not been to my sister's since I left. I have also cut off all contact with my friends who do drugs and drink to extremes. I am not going around that. It will mess up what I am doing. I have been clean/sober a week. I know that is not a big milestone but after two days of Detox I feel better.

Glad to hear it!
Keep on that path and you will have the sobriety you want. Don't ever be afraid to ask for help. A week is a huge milestone -- you should feel good about that. One day at a time...

in my experience, coming from 4 yrs off of opiates, with many...many... many... relapses

you can always choose to stop the cycle when u are finally ready.

it's a new beginning for you. glad you're getting the help you need. we're here for you.

Clean & sober a week is MAJOR!! I'm so happy for you & excited that you've made it this far!! Wow ... If you're still on the path, it's so great. Especially that you're in a program, not white-knuckling it.
As madisgram said, we are here for you ... let us know what we may do.
Roadie

Congratulations on a week sober! I am also in a dual diagnosis group. It is so great to know that you're not alone at least for a few hours a week. Keep up the good work!!

How's it coming, brokenandalone? Stay in touch. Anything we can do, let us know ...
Roadie

I went to my first group yesterday. It was really nice. I meant a lot of people there. My cordinator is also a recovering addict so he understands our struggle but he has been clean/sober a lot longer so it helps to see that there is hope.

Not everyone likes being in a group--I hope you do. A feeling of family can grow in a group over time, that's a good thing usually. Did you exchange contact means with anyone? Thanks for updating us.

Not yet but I might on Wensday. I kind of do like it we make some jokes in there but everyone takes it very seriously. It is just a way to bring humor to a touch battle.

I remember having that reaction to my early AA meetings. Laughing? Are these people crazy? But now I understand how humor comes with perspective. A therapist I know who works mainly with professional comics says they carry the most pain around. Go figure.
I'm so glad the meeting you went to feels like a good place for you. Always remember there are other meetings, so never stick with a group that doesn't "fit" you.
Roadie

I wanted to let everyone know yesterday made 2 weeks sober/clean.

TWO WEEKS, brokenandalone!! OMG, 14 days


Only someone who has done that, one day at a time--those long, 24
hour days that can seem to go on forever--can know what you've
accomplished. I've been there, I know ... and I'm very proud of you.
Woo hoo, brokenandalone!!

Roadie

Yea I have been tested every day. I work at a drug store and we sell booze and then yesterday my mom sent to me a liquior store to get smokes for me and her. That really tested me but I survived it. I have been writing notes on paper for when I am at work. The first day I went into treatment I had to work that same day. It tested me so bad but I wrote on a piece of my recipet paper a note that said you are a strong women you don't need it after every time I sold booze to someone I looked at it and it kept me focus on my goal. If I hit six months sober/clean I will be so proud. Oh btw Roadie thank for what you posted on my profile that was nice of you.

Be proud of each day, brokenandalone. Try not to think about six months ... a day at time is really plenty to take on, especially selling the stuff!! WOW