[feary]

what am I going to do? I obsess about this fear of aging and dying and time passing constantly.

I can't function or focus

I am so terrified.

The worst is feeling myself older and feeling myself having an illness and dying

How will I handle it?

I will be so terrified

I feel SHEER TERROR right now.

[lynn P.]

Would it help knowing that the worry and stress will make you older. Would this motivate you to feel more calm. Take some very slow deep breaths. Everything will be okay. This fear can't hurt you.

[Lisa Michelle]

feary are you on any medication? seeing a therapist?

Worrying about tomorrow is only wasting today. Time passes, but it's a good thing. If time didn't pass we would never have any experiences, never meet/spend time with people we love.

The older you are the more LIFE you have had.

Please try not to stress so much. You need to see a therapist or somebody who can reassure you. You weren't scared of this before, were you? You're so scared of getting an illness but this in itself is an illness and it's ruining your life RIGHT NOW. It could help you to work through these issues with a therapist.

Do you do anything in your daily life that you enjoy?

I'm sorry you're so upset and worried, I wish I could help but my best advice is talk to a professional. x

[feary]

I've seen a therapist for the past two years

I have tried many meds but they just make me worse

I just was put on effexor yesterday so let's see what that does

I doubt it will help

nothing and no one can help me

I know worrying makes things worse but I can't control it

I tried and tried SO HARD for these past two years to feel better but nothing has helped at all so now I give up

I wish I had the courage to do something but I don't

I lost everything I fear every second

[lynn P.]

Is 2 yrs around the time your marriage broke up? It's not too bad getting older - in fact I feel more confident now, compared to when I was twenty. If you eat healthy, exercise and don't tan excessively - then you'll age gracefully too. How about you just accept that we're all aging and getting older. Have you been taught techniques on how to manage your thoughts? I'm thinking you might have 'intrusive thoughts' .

[Lisa Michelle]

feary I'm so sorry that you're struggling so much. I do believe there is a way out. I understand you feel like there isn't, I feel exactly the same way a lot of the time, I keep saying nobody can help and that I'm never going to get better. But there is evidence that mental illnesses can be recovered from.

It sounds like your therapist or doctor agrees that your medication hasn't been working, it's a good thing that you're trying a new one now, hopefully this one will work for you! and if not there are others you can try. don't give up.

I think you have a lot more courage than you realise. You just need time to be able to use it. You have been in therapy for a long time so you are dedicated to getting better, by the sounds of it. Don't give up, it's worth the fight!

[pachyderm]

Originally Posted by feary

nothing and no one can help me

Believe me, I know what you mean. But feeling that way and it being true are not the same thing. Stick with us here on Psych Central and see if things get better...

[feary]

Originally Posted by pachyderm

Believe me, I know what you mean. But feeling that way and it being true are not the same thing. Stick with us here on Psych Central and see if things get better...

Yes, this place and all of you mean so much to me. I do not know what I would do without you.

Thank you forever.

Have you considered a support group for single parents? In addition to sharing and solving problems in common, you may make new friends and won't feel so alone in this. You might start by changing your avatar, it's scary, represents your state of mind?

[feary]

I have so many places and things I need to go to and do that adding a support group would not work right now. I wish I could. I am terrified utterly terrified. I can hardly function.

I like my avatar. it is lost and sad and fallen and hopeless and that is how I feel.

I'm sorry feary. I also have been where you're at right now, hanging on by a thread. Life is all about change, believe me it will get better, nothing stays the same. I'm in my sixties now, but I was a newlywed at your age. Every day is a new beginning. You have your children to be strong for, they will keep you going on even your darkest night, they depend on you. When you're ready, you will move forward. You're in a stage of attempting to gather strength, it's different for everyone. Without hope there is no life, hold on to this thought while going through the storm. We all care so much because we have been there too.

feary, does your therapist and psychiatrist know the treatment you are receiving is no working?

[valfor]

I agree with muncie.......start by changing your avatar..it's a start just give it a try ..... you really need some positivness on your side and i would start there..baby steps

[feary]

I can't handle the terror and sadness I will feel when it is my time to die and I can't get over that fact and I cannot handle that I am aging and losing my youth.

I can hardly breathe.

Have you really dug in deep with your psychiatrist why you have a fear of getting old and dying when you're only in your thirties? There must be an underlying factor, something based more on reality that you could work on. Sometimes we transfer fears so we don't have to face the BIG one. Maybe it's time to think about changing doctors.

[feary]

sorry I have to write somewhere. I feel EXTREME SHEER TERROR right now and fear something might happen to me soon

I feel overwhelmed by everything

I can't take care of my children, it's too much

I can't do anything

I am too terrified of bad things happening to me or those I love.

Too much terror.

[Stranger2]

Hi feary,
You said you have just started taking effexor.. Keep in mind that it takes six to eight weeks before it starts working.. Like you I have been on just about everything.. My pdoc put me back on effexor because it worked the best.. I am now on a high regiment of the drug..Something you might want to talk to him about is putting you on either geodon or abilify for the irrational thoughts.. Just a thought and wanted to eductae you on the affects of effexor.. Take Care!!!

[pachyderm]

((((feary)))) hoping that some will make you feel less fearful.

[feary]

Originally Posted by Stranger2

Hi feary,
You said you have just started taking effexor.. Keep in mind that it takes six to eight weeks before it starts working.. Like you I have been on just about everything.. My pdoc put me back on effexor because it worked the best.. I am now on a high regiment of the drug..Something you might want to talk to him about is putting you on either geodon or abilify for the irrational thoughts.. Just a thought and wanted to eductae you on the affects of effexor.. Take Care!!!

My anxiety has gone CRAZY into panic since I started the effexor and I am only at 12.5 mg because this has happened with every other med I tried

I am just so sensitive to medication and nothing works. Is this normal?

She did mention abilify but I have heard horror stories about that.

what do i do when no meds even work?

I can't even take care of my kids now. I can't see a future. I live in confusion and don't know what I am doing. I feel so lost and don't know who I am.

I don't feel like doing anything except being alone and trying to cure this.

[ECHOES]

So many of our fears, which stimulate anxiety and panic reactions, are about things like this, that we have no control over.

That can sound frightening too. But it can also be freeing, because there is nothing to do about it. It just is. And it is out of our control.

If you like to read, there is a wonderful writer who writes in a calming way and is so enjoyable to read. The author is Pema Chodron and her 2 of her books that were helpful to me are: "The Wisdom of No Escape" and "When Things Fall Apart, Heart Advice for Difficult Times". Small easy to read books, 100-150 pages. Packed with new perspectives, different ways to think about things, and stimulating yet calming too. I found them at Borders, probably are on Amazon