[onelessbp]

i'm a 28 yr old female and i'm biploar and i've been abused in every way all i want to know is how do you forgive and let go so i don't continue to be bitter please help me

[onelessbp]

ok i want to tell you about myself i'm 28 and i was on meds i think they made my condition worse i was on 12 diffrent meds i was married and i destroyed my marriage my family all have mental illness i have a son who has odd and adhd and i seem to get into it with like everyone i 'll call my friends and family like million times a day untill they no longer answer i was abused in everyway and i feel like i need to tell my family but they will laugh and make fun of me i've always tried to be the level headed one but they seem to think i'm always causing trouble i saved my dad's life severl times by getting him medical help and he don't see that he thinks i'm evil i 'm their for my mom i'm over her living will but she turns her back on me untill she's ill and i've put up with a lot in my days i just want to know how to move on with out horboring any negitive feelings and or to be bitter at this point i'm confused and i'm on a waiting list for a theripist you seem like a friendly bunch just need a honest opinion thanks <font color="pink"> </font>

[DaveyJones]

Hi, onelessbp...it's good that you have stopped by here to visit. There are lots of caring people who will listen to you and offer you support.

It really sounds like you do have a lot on your plate...you say you have been Dx'd bipoar, but you are no longer taking your medications. It sounds like you were on quite a few...that can be very overwhelming, never feeling right.

Have you seen a doctor for your condition recently? I am worried about you from reading your posts this morning. You sound like your thoughts are all jumbled together, like maybe you are feeling pretty manic? I apologize for being direct, but you need to take care of yourself first before you can address any of the other problems you mention.

It is quite common, normal, even for bipolar to run in families...my ex-wife's family is, I believe, close to 100% BP. They have put each other through a lot over the years. You have to understand that it is the disease that causes the behaviors. Their behaviors, in turn, trigger yours, and so on. Trust me, I watched it for years, I know how frustrating it can be when the ones who are supposed to love you most seem to turn on you and want to hurt you. You really just have to stop playing the games. I heard my ex say it over and over to their faces, "I'm not playing this game anymore". It took a while, but I think they have calmed down a bit.

You need to seek counseling not only for bipolar but also the feelings that stem from the abuse you have suffered. You need to get back in treatment for your bipolar. I know it seems unlikely, but my ex and my kids and I have all made significant progress over the past year or so. You can too, but you can't do it alone. And you don't have to! You have lots of friends here who care about you!

DJ

one of the most important things that Davey said was for you to take care of yourself. you cannot change your family and they probably don't even want to change. working on making your personal life better is all that we have the power to do. and telling them that the games aren't working anymore is appropriate. hand them a quarter and tell them to call someone that cares!!!! xoxoxo pat

[Rhapsody]

Dear Onelessbp,

Please check this website out, for it has been of great help and a source of light to me and my inability to forgive.... I seek to forgive not for the offenders sake but for my own health and peace of mind.

My therapist recommended the RF Book and 13 Step CD to me - to use in between my visits with her when I needed a little extra help (when the why was unknown) and it has been a life saver to me ever since I found them...

LoVe,
Rhapsody -

WEBSITE LINK: http://www.radicalforgiveness.com/

[onelessbp]

i just wanted to say thanks to you all

[onelessbp]

here i am again feeling every terrible emotion again i feel like i can't keep a hold of my life nothing continues to go right the simplest things i try to do goes wrong and i can't figure out why so i stopped trying to i got a counselor and she's from a undiscovered planet so that shows how well we relate so i decided to right a poem to help with my stress and i wish to share it with all that wish to read it

In my life it's very little light that's what i call my day and my night
I feel like everyone has ran away
When i come outside no one wants to play
I feed myself with all the emotional pain
I wish God would take away my brain
Because I'm going insane
I have no more to give
I don't want to live
You don't understand the life i live
God you know i pray
with out you i couldn't bare another day