Lamotrigine?

No robert relax take a breather. Just think of all the good it can do for you. just relax this will pass. I cant make the decision for you but please give it some time. I have been done with meds many a time and always end up ruining something so please relax it will be ok.

Okay I think you need to take big breaths and calm down Yes the rash looks scary, but you will catch it early and go to your doctor and stop the med *IF* you get it. And the chances are so so small. I'm not worried about it at all - I'm informed about it, I know what to look out for and I know what to do *IF* it appears

To say you are done with ALL meds because of the infinitesimally small chance of a serious side effect from ONE med is some serious distorted thinking. Just try to clam down and then reassess flushing your meds - don't do anything rash (pun intended!)

*Willow*

Im just against lamictal now ugh it doesnt work fast enough you can get a hell of a bad rash all that jazz but other meds Im all for.

Problem is I understand all the logic and that my thinking is distorted (if I am being honest I'll just say my emotional side is stupid on this subject) but holy hell I am having a panic attack over this.

I have no access to my meds right now which is good because they'd be gone already. I'll sleep on it before I do anything.

In the meantime I am trying to breathe, count and work. It's not working right now but I think it's calming me a bit. I'll be fine in a few hours, I think.

I'm not for meds, at all. I did a string of SSRI's and hated them, they took away things from me that were very important (sex drive and energy) which is why I have had such a hard time getting back on meds. And now that I finally 'gave in' and accepted meds, I get one that will kill me with a ****ing rash.

I feel like I climbed a personal mountain to get back on meds which is probably stupid, I know other people (hell, even I) have more serious problems then whether or not to medicate, but it's been killing me. I climb that mountain and THIS is the med I get.

I'm glad you're going to sleep on it. Things always look better in the morning, so they say

Actually lamotrigine reportedly has a fairly good side effect profile, in that most people suffer few bad side effects. The pic I posted is off an allergic type rash that anyone can get e.g. I got it head to toe after a sleepover as a kid because I was allergic to their washing powder. Bit of antihistamine and I was sorted. The idea is to catch SJS early when it is simple to treat. Please don't worry so much. Even if you can't get yourself to take any more lamotrigine, there are other meds out there you could try. Don't discount ALL meds because of ONE med experience.

*Willow*

You're pretty much so preaching to the choir. My logical side understands and agrees with you 100%. But something else is in me that is making me flip. Also, I didn't have one bad med experience, I had many but all were really SSRI's. This isn't even a bad experience right now, it's me worrying about something that might not ever happen.

Basically, I've been in intensive outpatient therapy for the past month, 3 nights a week, 3 hours at a time. I had a appointment set out to the 12th (yesterday) for meds. Over the 4 weeks it took me to get to that appointment I ruminated on meds. One day I was convinced to take them, the next I said I'd never take them. I finally got over that hurdle and felt pretty good about meds for a few days and now I am seeing this it is just killing me inside. Sleeping on it will hopefully help and return me to having my logic controlling me.

Thank you and Clinte for your posts. I needed to be talked off a ledge here and you both helped, I'm still standing on that ledge, but I pulled my toes back from dangling off it. I had no one else to talk to at that moment and you were both there. That means a ton and I just wanted to voice my appreciation.

So robert what did you decide?

lamictal helps clear the fog in my head. without it, you might find me staring into space drooling... and im serious. it is hard to snap out of it, and i can try all day to stay attached, then just end up worse for a couple days.
lamictal helps that for some unknown reason....

as far as mood.. i dont know.
im still pretty up and down despite the meds.

Good to hear on one note but fir moods its making me even more skeptical

Day five on Lamictal (lamotrigine)for me. No more headaches today. That was nice. In fact, no side effects today.

It is early, so I am as skeptical as can be about it being early to notice a difference, but so help me, I am. My mom called me in the middle of the night crying uncontrollably because she was stuck with a needle of an HIV patient at work. Ordinarily I would have been crying right along with her. I am crier. I cry for no reason at all and this was definitely more than "no reason." The old me would have completely fallen to pieces and this probably would have set off some serious depression. Only I didn't cry or fall apart. I was level headed and calm. No tears at all. I helped her figure out where we go from here (meds and testing for a number of months; thankfully 99.7% of the time the person stuck with the needle ends up being fine). Anyway, I am recognizing that this is DEFINITELY doing something for my moods and helping me be calmer. I am really looking forward to seeing how I do once I've been on it for a few months.

Oh yeah, and just about the time I started my self-talk in my head about maybe I am emotionally numb, I was watching a show with my daughter and when they showed a breath-taking waterfall, I got goosebumps. I'm not totally apathetic about things. I can still feel.

Not trying to convince anyone of anything...just sharing how it's going for me. <3

That sounds great piperLeigh. Im on day 4 and have noticed that Im not as depressed as usual so maybe its just time but I hope these meds work and I stay less depressed for a long time to come.

I've been on lamictal for four years. Only mood stabilizer I have been on. It took maybe 2 weeks to have an idea it was doing anything, six weeks to get to the right dose, but it has definitely helped me. It will take a while to realize the full effects, but it sounds like it may already be working. Awesome!

Sometimes it's just knowing that something is being done for us that gets us through those early days and weeks on a new medication.

You know how it is when you've had bronchitis for a couple of days and you finally decide to see a doctor, then start feeling better as you're waiting in the exam room? I think that's the effect you're seeing now, as I did when I first started Lamictal. Looking back, it wasn't until I hit 125, then 150, and finally 200 mg/day that I really made major strides, but at the low doses I felt that it was doing something for me, so I was disappointed whenever I had an up-and-down day or series of days.

I tell you this because it's so easy to be fooled into thinking things are so much better, when in reality you've still got a ways to go. There's nothing wrong with being optimistic; you just need to understand that you haven't reached a therapeutic dose yet and there'll be some bumps in the road to navigate before you get there.

I've been at this since February and I still haven't found stability yet; it takes time and a lot of experimentation for most people to find that perfect "bipolar cocktail". If you're really lucky, you may need only one or two drugs to manage your BP, and you may even do well on a low dose of lamotrigine.

Everyone is different......five months ago when my internist sent me to a psychiatrist, it was supposed to be a one- or two-shot deal---an evaluation, maybe a mood stabilizer, and then back to my internist for med management. It may be that way for you. But for me, that first visit was only the tip of the proverbial iceberg, and things got complicated really quickly; now I'm seeing my pdoc every 2-3 weeks and we're still tweaking meds and treatments, with no end in sight.

That's OK though; it took me fifty-three years to get diagnosed, and my BP isn't going to go gently into that good night. I hope it's a much simpler and easier course for you!

Yeah i agree maybe its just that as in the beginning for me im very skeptical and now im back to tht as past night i was very depressed and had a psychotic episode. i have changed meds so much in the past 8 months it seems i change at least dose every month. I hope i can become stable soon. Although that will take a long time ti get used to.

I love Lamictal. Very few side effects. When I am "stable" I am on Lamictal alone. Right now I'm on Lamictal along with Lithium and Seroquel which I hate. I trying to get back to that point. My current shrink thinks I need to stay on the other 2. He says if its not broke don't fix it but it is broke I keep telling him. Seroquel turns me into a zombie and I cant stand the side effects of Lithium- the thrist the peeing and the possible long term kidney and thyroid.

See lamictal alone didnt help me whih is why in skeptical to try it again. Glad it works for you though. Cheers

Thank you for this. Today was a hard day. Bad headaches and dizziness. I told my husband I need a "magic" feather like Dumbo the elephant had that made him believe he could fly. I need something, anything to hold on to with extreme optimism so I can convince myself that I am okay. I want so badly to believe this will be that, but it's probably good for me to be reminded that this is a journey and there is road left in front of me to go.

I have a melancholy personality, but somewhere deep inside there is a little optimist. People who know me would be shocked if they knew that Pollyanna is one of my favorite books. The older I get, the greater appreciation I have for people who can play their own little "glad game" and find something to be happy about, even in lousy circumstances. So I guess today I will be happy that I'm only on day 6, and be happy that there is still good potential for positive changes in the weeks ahead. And also for people like you who have "been there, done that" who gently offer encouragement about how to weather these ups and downs. ++

I'm pushing forward with it, I've taken it 3 days in a row. Every time I take it, I feel sick with worry, I keep thinking about this skin issue no matter how unlikely it is.

My anxiety is just going crazy now and I can't really stop. I had some fun with the gf yesterday which got my mind off it but now that I am home it's right back into my head. I've noticed no difference with the meds but didn't expect to, it's been 3 days. I'll stick with it until I have a few months on the therapeutic dose. Unless I get any kind of rash. My leg was slightly red yesterday because I think I scratched it. I kept asking my gf to look at it to make sure she didn't think it was anything. If my anxiety keeps up like this, I might not make it long enough for the therapeutic dose, but the plan is to try like hell to get there.

That sounds great robert. Cheers to you! Keep it up im sure your anxiety will pass. Im on day 5 and havent notice a real difference but im more hopeful now so keep it up i got over my anxiety about the rash im sure you can as well. Hang in there.

Guess I lied.

I just dumped them in some nasty garbage to make sure I wouldn't go back and get them. I was too fearful of flushing them because I don't want to give anyone else SJS.

I realized something last night, the more research I do, the more therapy I do, the more I talk about myself.... the worse I get. I plan to step away from it all, everything mental health related except what I have learned about coping and I am going to make this work with no mind altering substances, I don't care how hard it gets.

Well ill give you that different approaches work for different people so best of luck to you. My family is wht keeps me medicated i dont want to hurt them or my friends anymore or myself for matter.

That's a great reason to medicate, probably a very large reason I should remain on the med path. But I don't care. I am even denying I am bipolar at this point. I've had my mom die about 6 months ago and a terrible divorce, of course I am going to have some ups and downs. Even thought I can go down the check list of BPII and see myself in it, even though I can see the cycle and it's like clockwork, I want to get past the divorce and a year from my moms death before I start thinking anything other than I am a weak man who can't deal with life. And I will not take meds to cover up weakness.

I will continue therapy but that's it. No more of this site after tonight, no more groups, just me and my few supports and I'll see what happens.

I've been on lamotrigine since November. It took a while for it to take effect (I'm at 300mg now), but once it finally did, it's kept me almost rock-hard stable. I do still have a low-level depression sometime, but it's not disrupting my ability to function anymore. My high moods don't get out of control either.

I do have some side effects, but they're tolerable. Dry mouth, especially overnight and into the morning, though I can pretty much expect that with any psych med. I also get a mild but tolerable itchiness all over my body, though no rashes. I get a touch of restlessness and insomnia, and my short-term memory is pretty much shot at this point, though I'm sure a big part of that is just the bipolar. I'm also having a hard time focusing on one thing at a time - I jump from task to task, it's eerily like ADHD, methinks. Oh yeah, and I yawn like crazy.

I do notice if I miss a dose, especially in the morning (I take 200 when I wake up, and 100 before bed) I slip into a foggy-headed depression for the rest of the day, and taking it in the middle of the day doesn't help much though once I take my dose the next day, I am fine.

I'm considering asking my pdoc about augmenting the lamotrigine with an antidepressant - I'm thinking wellbutrin perhaps. Overall though, I wouldn't drop my lamotrigine for the world, I've gone from deep suicidal depressions and a horrible mixed episode, to nearly stable, and always functional.

I have been on Lamictal for ummm over a year now ..I had no trouble titrating up to my now current 150mg at nite .. My Pdoc and Tdoc said Lamictal kinda works in the background for depression and I probably wouldnt really notice a huge change.. they were both right .. Its Not a WOW Oh my goodness this medication is fabulous I did finally notice that my depression had eased up a little.. I rapid cycle so im up and down numerous times a day.

I also take Lithium and personally I think the lamictal and lithium have affected my memory ..I use to be really smart and quick could remember little details from years ago ..My husband has noticed a kinda big change in my ability to remember things.. I have spoken to my Pdoc about these problems and him and I decided that for now the pros outweight the cons ( no recent hospital stays) so I will continue taking them.

Most everyone does fine when they start Lamictal the percentage of people that do get SJS or the rash is ridiculous low ..

Good Luck ~

Well thanks for the post i must say my trust in this medication has gone up with each post for the most part. Im tirtating up to 100mg but he said we have to take its slow and pull back on my trileptal after we get to 100 so well see currently im on day 7 and question wether ive been touching mania as right now im wired with plans to go out and do things i havent in ages but maybe thats what life is suppose to e like idk if its the medication or what bit life is getting better for the first time in a while like i feel amazing for the past few days idk im gonna hope its the meds working.