so we are all (hopefully) emerged from the other side of christmas day

how was it for you guys?

better, the same, or worse than you expected

for me it was a case of being shut away in my room..... family totally ignoring me, no happy christmas wishes, anything like that- so in all honesty, it was pretty tragic

i did treat myself though... i think i remember writing about that massage chair i wanted?

well. ordered it- so that should at least be something to look forward to!

shso sad that no one even noticed me during the holidays, but hey.... i've emerged the other side.

how about you guys

[Miss Laura]

God Shattered!!!

Well I hate to say it but I had a great day.... although I did become ill about 4pm but perked up once I had a few drinks lol! The Nephew's 1st Christmas was brilliant he was spoilt rotten lol! Should of seen my Brother's car..... think they have 3/4th's of Toys R Us in their car lol!!!

[bluemountains]

The same old desolate feeling I feel every year after Christmas. The day itself was great. My family did all of the traditions, presents, breakfast, lounging around, being lazy, turkey dinner, etc. The weather was so great that we took a hike at a nature park. in the evening my daughter and I went to see Les Miserable (a must see!)

All sounds so wonderful, but now it's morning, the rain is pouring, and I want all signs of Christmas gone. it's like snow, when fresh, it's wonderful, but when dirty and piled up from the plows, it's so ugly.

Blue mountains

[Clinte89]

Well my Christmas was pretty good, good friends and family I did hide for part of it though got overwhelmed with everything. But the day after has been hell! We didn't get everything cleaned up because why stay up till 12 cleaning so my gma freaks out on me this morning all you people are gross and blah blah blah full on ***** mode. Ugh gotta go finish cleaning up.

[Confusedinomicon]

My Christmas was pretty good. I got to see Les Mis and thought it was good too....actually cried! My family spent the whole day together and my dad finally perfected his lasagna recipe.

Today sucks. I had to wake up at 4:30 to go to work with my dad so he can drop me off at the airport later. I'm going to cali....get to spend the whole day in a car! (esentially)

[bunnifoo]

I didn't spend the holidays with my family - they live out of state and I wasn't up to travelling. Which is good because I think the anxiety would have done me in dealing with plane rides and the airport.

But I'm sad because I miss them. And I have a whole ton of phone calls to make and that's driving up my anxiety and the Saphris side effects aren't fun.

I was feeling okay but now I'm feeling down again, post holiday let down I guess.

[sme49]

I had the saddest 2 days in a long time, the 24th and 25th. I can't even write what I want to write for this post b/c I keep deleting and re-writing. I was alone with my pets, and with a very broken heart.

[faerie_moon_x]

Mine was good. Quiet. Just watched movies all day and played games. It went by too fast. I could use another 10 or so days like that. Plus it snowed, which is rare to have a white Christmas for us here.

We did Christmas on Christmas Eve, which was also very good. Just presents and dinner. Stayed home this year and it was nice.

[Trippin2.0]

My solitary Christmas was gatecrashed by my ex SIL, it didn't suck completely, even though it wasn't what I planned. Today I feel like faecal matter, really triggered, angry, and tearful. ****** ****** day!!!

Originally Posted by Miss Laura

God Shattered!!!

Well I hate to say it but I had a great day.... although I did become ill about 4pm but perked up once I had a few drinks lol! The Nephew's 1st Christmas was brilliant he was spoilt rotten lol! Should of seen my Brother's car..... think they have 3/4th's of Toys R Us in their car lol!!!

very cool laura!

what pressies did you get, and what about the nephew?

[Miss Laura]

Hey there Shattered!

I got a kindle, have been wanting 1 for a year now lol! Loads of socks and smellies, cd's and dvd's, got Monopoly as my home city brought out a version if it sits brilliant, got a cover that just goes round your arms and is huge its on tv advertised a lot, pj's and slippers which are tradition in our house, make up and lotions etc, a new wii game (joint present with my sister), got an 'Auntie' sign from my Nephew too!

My Nephew got loads of clothes, shoes, hats and scarves and mittens, toys, a stuffed dog we have christened 'doggy' in honour of my Brother's old childhood toy also know as 'doggy'

We have just stuffed ourselves and are now chilling before my relatives come over

What about you Shattered what did you get?

[Moose72]

My Christmas was very nice. Today has been kinda crappy since my mom is home and has only complained. Plus her stupid husband tired to throw out a Christmas present! He's so mean!

It's snowing like crazy right now. I'm going to have leftover pizza after my half a work out. Lol oh well

[Ladyzero]

How sad am I ? I'm ashamed to say I did NOTHING for Christmas. Absolutely ZILCH. Nothing was bought, no cards or presents.
My son bought food to make a christmas dinner, but I could not face even getting up, for that. I pursuaded him to leave me, take the food to his sister's house and cook it there for them two. His sister had no desire to see me, so she stayed outside, when she picked him up.
So it was another day in bed, no christmas, no christmas dinner. I ate a strawberry trifle, and opened a bottle of wine, they left me.
No one from my family rang to say happy christmas, not even my daughter. My Dad had sent me a card and inside was a cheque for me to treat myself.

My neighbour dropped a present by, unexpectedly on christmas eve. My only present, a box of chocs. I hadn't even sent him a card (or anyone) so I was quite embaressed. We don't usually exchange gifts. He just left it at my door so I didn't have to face him. ( I'd have never opened the door had he knocked, I look a right fright. Months in bed, rarely showering, etc ! Imagine the shame !)

So christmas passed me by.

I'm both extremely sad, and ashamed, to admit, just how I spent my christmas.

Originally Posted by Miss Laura

Hey there Shattered!

I got a kindle, have been wanting 1 for a year now lol! Loads of socks and smellies, cd's and dvd's, got Monopoly as my home city brought out a version if it sits brilliant, got a cover that just goes round your arms and is huge its on tv advertised a lot, pj's and slippers which are tradition in our house, make up and lotions etc, a new wii game (joint present with my sister), got an 'Auntie' sign from my Nephew too!

My Nephew got loads of clothes, shoes, hats and scarves and mittens, toys, a stuffed dog we have christened 'doggy' in honour of my Brother's old childhood toy also know as 'doggy'

We have just stuffed ourselves and are now chilling before my relatives come over

What about you Shattered what did you get?

that sounds awsome, laura.

i'm glad you had a nice time!

what did i get?

naturally, nothing.... i've no one who cares enough to really buy me anything.

so i treated myself- i ordered some cds and dvds off amazon, (ones that i wanted for a while) and also that massage chair i said that i wanted a while back

well... the way i see it, just because no one can be bothered to get me anything- i'm not going without.... so i'll order some things myself- why should i have to go without any gifts.

[Tsunamisurfer]

The build up to Christmas, and Christmas day were very busy and pressured. I found it stressful having so many people noisily buzzing around. One day later now, I have been putting my feet up and resting it out.
The pressure picks up again tomorrow, but with fixing my daughter's new bedroom up. Handyman stuff, which I don't mind if it can make somebody happy. At least it isn't socially demanding .

So, for me, Yes! The emergence has been a lot better than the celebrations and prep.

[SmokeyPoole2012]

I can't understand why I am always so depressed during this time of year. Always have been and I come to except that I probably always will be. There is however the undeniable fact that when I woke up this morning I magically felt a bit better. Not to say I'm that I don't have some symptoms of depression but I sense that the up side of my character is about to emerge again.
Am I happy about this? Can't say that I am reason being is because even after spending more than ¾ of this year in treatment taking my pharmaceuticals, meeting with my therapist on a regular basis and making amends with friends and family and doing what I can to make myself well I still find myself on this roller coaster ride fighting back the unmentionable thoughts that quite honestly scares the heck out of me.
So how do I feel? I am happy the season is coming to an end and yes I know that I will begin to start feeling less depressed for what ever that's worth because I can't say that I well yet.

Originally Posted by Ladyzero

How sad am I ? I'm ashamed to say I did NOTHING for Christmas. Absolutely ZILCH. Nothing was bought, no cards or presents.
My son bought food to make a christmas dinner, but I could not face even getting up, for that. I pursuaded him to leave me, take the food to his sister's house and cook it there for them two. His sister had no desire to see me, so she stayed outside, when she picked him up.
So it was another day in bed, no christmas, no christmas dinner. I ate a strawberry trifle, and opened a bottle of wine, they left me.
No one from my family rang to say happy christmas, not even my daughter. My Dad had sent me a card and inside was a cheque for me to treat myself.

My neighbour dropped a present by, unexpectedly on christmas eve. My only present, a box of chocs. I hadn't even sent him a card (or anyone) so I was quite embaressed. We don't usually exchange gifts. He just left it at my door so I didn't have to face him. ( I'd have never opened the door had he knocked, I look a right fright. Months in bed, rarely showering, etc ! Imagine the shame !)

So christmas passed me by.

I'm both extremely sad, and ashamed, to admit, just how I spent my christmas.

try not to feel too bad about it..

what is christmas anyway.

just another day that people make such a fuss of

Originally Posted by Moose72

My Christmas was very nice. Today has been kinda crappy since my mom is home and has only complained. Plus her stupid husband tired to throw out a Christmas present! He's so mean!

It's snowing like crazy right now. I'm going to have leftover pizza after my half a work out. Lol oh well

we've not had any sign of snow this year- though we do usually get it around january... so we'll just have to see

[purpledaisy]

Christmas sucked, but not as bad as I thought it was going to suck. And it sucked in a different way than it has in the past.

Opened presents with son and his girlfriend at our house Christmas Eve. Just a few days shy of turning 21, and my son got me a gift on his own for probably the third year in a row.

After my dad died 6 years ago, I didn't get any Christmas, birthday, or Mother's Day gifts from my son for a while because my dad always took him to get presents and paid for them. Even doing that my son's entire life, it's like it didn't ever sink in, "Hey, my mom buys me gifts. Maybe I should buy her something."

So I was wondering if I would get a gift, and I was touched that he got me a couple of small things and they are things that I like.

I got 3 Christmas cards in the mail. I didn't mail any. I never do.

I put up a Christmas tree for the first time in about 10 years. Figured if this is my son's last Christmas at home (since he wants to move out), I'd at least try to make it seem like Christmas.

I talked my son and his girlfriend into going to my mom's boyfriend's house for lunch. They're in their 70s. Mom really wanted us to come out there.

We didn't have traditional Christmas foods, which bothers me.

Christmas was always great when I was a kid. I saw both sets of grandparents. I saw cousins. We either had family over or we went to their houses and took turns each year. It was an all-day affair.

Christmas hasn't been like that for a very long time, and it has never been like that for my son because he only had one set of grandparents and no cousins.

Christmas morning, I had my big crying jag because my dad is no longer living.

After I got home Christmas night, I just played online. I thought about going to a movie by myself. I'm find with going to movies by myself, but thought it might be odd since it's Christmas and I knew the theaters would be crowded.

I went to bed without feeling tired, but it was midnight. I've hit a funk lately with not feeling tired but knowing I should go to bed to try to keep myself on schedule.

This morning my alarm went off and I gave myself another hour even though I was no longer tired and have a list of things to do.

Didn't shower. Didn't brush my teeth. Threw on dirty clothes. Ran a couple of errands, mostly to get out of this house.

I really hate the way we get all of these ideas from TV, movies, and commercials about how Christmas should be. Happy families around big dinner tables. Men giving their women diamonds. Beautifully-decorated houses. Tons of items that we NEED to buy, make, eat, etc., to make the holidays seem like holidays.

[faerie_moon_x]

Told my husband how far we've come. First Christmas together we weren't together, only online talking. Second Christmas together thrown out of house by evil step-biatch and driving to live 900 miles away. Third Christmas together in apartment of no furniture and no presents, just us and new baby (now 6 years old,) and used last money to buy dollar menu from Jack in Box for dinner. Fourth Christmas had money and first time had "Christmas" and then every year until this year, now thrown out of house again by same step-biatch but this time have a job and money and able to do our own Christmas and was best one ever..... Eight years later we have come so far.

[MommaR]

Im a little down today. Idk if its the fact that my hubby had built up my gift like I was gonna love it, then I opened it and found out he had kind of gotten something dif than he thought and I have to exchange it or a couple of the kids gifts needed items to go with them I didnt know about or just the "Christmas High" crash

[Miss Laura]

Scrap that guys! Today has totally ruined EVERYTHING for me............... MY FAMILY F@@@@@@ SUCK!! I am sick of all the fighting, the *****ing, the back stabbing, the whispering................... EVERYTHING!!! I want out NOW!!!

Sorry to put a damper on everything that's my family for you

Originally Posted by sme49

I had the saddest 2 days in a long time, the 24th and 25th. I can't even write what I want to write for this post b/c I keep deleting and re-writing. I was alone with my pets, and with a very broken heart.

Welcome sme49 and Your post really resonated. Though the details very likely differ, can so very much relate to not being sure of being able to really write what it was. Yeah. Still not sure. It was pretty sad as it was, but it found out on Xmas day that it could well have been the worst Christmas ever. Hands down.
Today is definitely much better. Yeah, I'm just sitting here debating whether I can actually write it or not.

And, well, Ladyzero, our moods/episodes aren't always cooperative with dates on a calendar, are they? So, though you are feeling bad about it, it is what it is. I understand. No judgement here, that's for sure! (Heh. My box of chocolates was from... me. Woot, eh?)

The light and easy is: hung out alone from Sunday evening through Christmas morning. BF was in one of his big sleeps (he'll sleep multiple days solid sometimes). Xmas Eve, walked to the drugstore down the street and got some frozen pizza (and box of chocolates, and what the hell, ice cream too -- everything on sale of course.) It wasn't bothering me all that much. A bit lonely, but not bad and nothing holiday-specific. Didn't have anything planned anyway.

Then Xmas. Hmmm. Ok. Here goes. Turns out the big sleep wasn't just the usual. He'd tried to OD.
Merry Christmas.
Could've been worse though.

So I guess post-holiday feeling is: relief.

[BlueInanna]

Not feeling so great, still have unopened presents under tree. It's a very bp family Xmas around here. Youngest had a happy time. My 18 year old daughter had panic attack cuz aunt gave her a rainbow candle, and "what does everyone in this family think I'm an effing hippy or something!" ... Whatever!

[BlueInanna]

Originally Posted by SmokeyPoole2012

I can't understand why I am always so depressed during this time of year. Always have been and I come to except that I probably always will be. There is however the undeniable fact that when I woke up this morning I magically felt a bit better. Not to say I'm that I don't have some symptoms of depression but I sense that the up side of my character is about to emerge again.
Am I happy about this? Can't say that I am reason being is because even after spending more than ¾ of this year in treatment taking my pharmaceuticals, meeting with my therapist on a regular basis and making amends with friends and family and doing what I can to make myself well I still find myself on this roller coaster ride fighting back the unmentionable thoughts that quite honestly scares the heck out of me.
So how do I feel? I am happy the season is coming to an end and yes I know that I will begin to start feeling less depressed for what ever that's worth because I can't say that I well yet.

"Unmentionable thoughts" well said and me too.

We know the thoughts will pass cuz we are experienced with this crap!