[winkynjr]

I have recently been diagnosed as having bipolar but am having a very hard time accepting it!! Not sure why! I am so so down and out but yet I refuse to take my meds!! I just don't understand!!!! Hurting!!!!

[~Christina]

Welcome to PC ,

Seems most people have a hard time accepting Bipolar. If it has you to the point where you won't take your medications you should talk to your Doctor , do you have a Therapist? There are a number of people here that aren't on medications and do just fine, These people also work very hard to get the skills and self care they need to do so.

Everyone here is Bipolar yet all of us are unique in our road of Bipolar.

Again Welcome to PC , Look forward to getting to know you better

[winkynjr]

I did have a shrink but I will not go back!! I have been seeing her for about 3 months and I was taking meds, but every time I went she changed them!!! She put me on one that I did not like the side effects on but she would not listen. S o my regular Dr gave me some of what was working but that was about a week ago and I can't get myself to take them, as stupid as that sounds.
I also have a counsellor that I see once a month but am thinking about quitting her too

[faerie_moon_x]

Maybe look for a new doctor instead. Talk therapy is a big help but you have to feel comfortable with the person. I'm not on meds at all and have no doctor or anything. I do the best I can but often know I'm not doing as well as I have the potential for, however; I'm not fully believing that meds will help me at this point, either. But that's more of an idea that I've gotten too much worse for it than that they don't work. (They do really, really help some people a lot!)

I'm not feeling so well right now, so I don't really have much advice. But, you're not alone and just because you have a diagnosis doesn't mean you've stopped being you. There are a lot of tools tha can help like a mood tracker, learning coping techniques, and just learning to be aware of yourself, your triggers, and what symptoms are most likely to disrupt you and signal a need for help ASAP.

[Cocosurviving]

Hi and welcome,
I can relate to you completely. I'm still struggling with my diagnose (dx). I was dx'd last Aug by a therapist and psychiatrist. I started taking meds and felt better. Last week I went for another evaluation. In my mind I was wondering if a mistake was made. The clinician assured me there was no mistake. For the last 9 months I've been going through the motions. I have a weekly routine, I participate in art therapy, I have a strict sleep schedule, I've learned my triggers and I've learned some coping skills. I understand you don't take your meds. I also have a therapist (T) and psychiatrist (Pdoc).

I take meds b/c I'm afraid of having another episode. Prior to being dx'd I had 3 episodes and I was out of control. I know episodes can happen while on meds. But on meds the episodes wouldn't be as often or severe. I'd rather not gamble. There's a lot of info out regarding BP. You can check out the national institute of mental and here, PC. Although I go through the motions I'm still trying to learn who I am now. I don't feel like the same person but that's my opinion. Maybe other people do. I can say I've been pretty stable since getting on the right meds (aside from some depression).

[ultramar]

Originally Posted by winkynjr

I did have a shrink but I will not go back!! I have been seeing her for about 3 months and I was taking meds, but every time I went she changed them!!! She put me on one that I did not like the side effects on but she would not listen. S o my regular Dr gave me some of what was working but that was about a week ago and I can't get myself to take them, as stupid as that sounds.
I also have a counsellor that I see once a month but am thinking about quitting her too

I'm sorry you're having such a hard time and you're having difficulty accepting the diagnosis. Maybe if you don't think of it in terms of the diagnosis, but instead as moods you are struggling with and need help with, regardless of the diagnosis. Since it didn't work out with your psychiatrist, I would recommend you look for another one, I'm of the mind that it's better that this be treated by a specialist rather than a PCP. Therapy can also be hugely helpful for bipolar disorder. Again, if this therapist isn't working out, maybe you can look for another one (maybe you can get referrals for both from your PCP) and see if you can go more regularly (i.e. weekly).

It may sound hokey, but maybe for you the first step is to recognize that you need help and seek out that help (easier said than done, I know). I'm sorry things aren't working out with the providers you've seen so far, but there are a lot more fish in the sea!

Good luck!