[Victoria'smom]

Bored enough to SI???? Wth is that about. I guess good otherwise.

[Hopeful Camel]

Woke up at 2am, mind racing. Got out of bed, when I knew I should stick to my sleep schedule, and am up, drinking a latte, sitting with the cat, on the computer. I'm not sitting with the cat on the computer. I want to ramp up and get out of this depression, somewhere in the recesses of my mind. Maybe this will help. Counter-sleep therapy???

[surfacetoair]

Conflicted

[Curiosity77]

More insomnia. I haven't had a good sleep in a month. My kitty is home and looks much better. She has some chronic health problems now, but looks like she will be ok for a while.

[tigersassy]

Good to hear curiosity77 about kitty being home.

[tigersassy]

Anger welling up. I'm so all over the place I don't know why though. If it's me trying to stabilize or my brain trying to "kill" me. I'm just everywhere and so easily pissed off. I need more sleep and I need to mellow, but my skin feels like it's crawling. Get to confront my therapist on Friday to figure out what our endgame is. Her form of therapy doesn't seem to be more than purging the things that have happened. My ankle is still causing issues. Work isn't helping any of this other crap either. Gotta try to sleep. Night all.

[Pikku Myy]

Good, bad, happy and sad My life...... overall better than past couple of days. At least I still feel alive

[Love&Toil]

Doing pretty well, just some financial stress. I've been a very busy person this week. Desperately want to take a break from work but have not had a day off in a long time. Proud of myself that I can still drag myself in to work, and drag myself around my responsibilities and do okay. Phew.

[Sad&Bipolar]

Starting last week of TMS treatments, but not feeling relief from depression or anxiety. Still hurting a lot.

[Tucson]

I am here. My depression continues. Usually by the night I feel better. Up and down, my depressed mood fluctuates.

[surfacetoair]

Lots of anxiety from being unemployed. The nervous energy has me a little on the manic side but if I take the klonopin I do sleep a little so I'm not worried. My doctor on the otherhand is concerned but I'm ignoring that. Meanwhile using the energy to work on different certifications to boost my resume, and trying to learn Spanish. I hate being wound up like this and I understand the risks, but I'm not adding lithium to the routine when I'm already on 4 other meds.

[Pikku Myy]

Complete and total emotional mess

[vjdragonfly]

Alone and feeling hopeless.

[Concrete Heart]

I feel completely empty inside. I can't bring myself to care about anything anymore. I've been let down so many times in life, I now block my emotions so I can't feel any emotional pain.

[toshia123110]

Is anyone welcome to comment on this? Its my second day.

My anxiety is better today. I have an appointment tomorrow and I'm gonna see about getting on different meds for my anxiety cause the one I'm on now makes me so tired.

[Wander]

Having ECT and now feeling awesome!! Yeh for medical science :

[Hopeful Camel]

My first day back to practicing law after a year away. Worked 11 hours today and am exhausted. I feel a bit overwhelmed. Trying to stay grounded. Not let my emotions get to out of hand. I'm going for a mentally healthy sustainable career, as my old therapist suggested. Off to sleep. Sticking to my sleep schedule. I am only human.

[surfacetoair]

Somewhat lucid.

[tigersassy]

Originally Posted by toshia123110

Is anyone welcome to comment on this? Its my second day.

My anxiety is better today. I have an appointment tomorrow and I'm gonna see about getting on different meds for my anxiety cause the one I'm on now makes me so tired.

Yes anyone is welcome to comment.
Therapy today after work. Weekend is almost here. And vacation starts after work next Friday. Yay.

[DDubzzz]

Facing my diagnosis head on...my PDoc says it's not so cut and dry. My manic episodes are primarily agitated insomnia and mixed episodes...panic attack crazy. This is new territory and I'm terrified

[Curiosity77]

At work today one my social worker colleagues told me the she is struggling with adhd and low mood, and she is considering meds but is worried about stigma and side effects. She wanted my opinion on whether there was a med that could address both these issues, because I'm an NP, and she wanted my opinion on if she should take medication. So i made a med suggestion, and talked to her about pros and cons of meds. She was obviously struggling with stigma and feeling that as a social worker she should not have mental health issues. So i told her that i take medications and have bipolar, to challenge the stigma she was feeling. We are friends, and also i don't care anymore if people at work find out because i've been there over a year and people know i'm stable and good at what i do. Anyways, she was like "wow, that's amazing! You are bipolar and a nurse practitioner." So i said "yes, recovery is possible. It's not us and them with the patients, 1 in 4 people have mental health issues at some point." So she thanked me for telling her, and i said it's cool, not a secret. It felt good. I've decided ***** stigma! Things won't change until people start showing that mental illness doesn't mean you fit the stereotypes. I can't expect my patients to accept their illnesses and themselves if i won't do the same. It feels pretty good.

[tigersassy]

Divorcing my therapist. I had a plan of attack going in there today. I've been feeling very stuck. No movement forward. I told her that more than once. That I needed direction and new coping mechanism. (She's been less than helpful for the past few months like 6months +). So her response to this is you just have too much going on. You don't have time to deal with you. Are you freaking serious? I'm in therapy I'm selling help to deal with so much crap from PTSD to this diagnosis of bipolar. And you tell me I don't have time to deal with me. So we talk and all we do is talk not even bout the crap need to talk about to deal with things even when I start to talk about it. She says we'll talk about it, but as soon as it starts getting around to deep things she says we need to talk about something lighter. I didn't divorce her today. I scheduled another appt because I have a hard time letting people down. Doing good though. Doing really well. Hope don't slip to much.

[Manic Trance]

Originally Posted by Curiosity77

At work today one my social worker colleagues told me the she is struggling with adhd and low mood, and she is considering meds but is worried about stigma and side effects. She wanted my opinion on whether there was a med that could address both these issues, because I'm an NP, and she wanted my opinion on if she should take medication. So i made a med suggestion, and talked to her about pros and cons of meds. She was obviously struggling with stigma and feeling that as a social worker she should not have mental health issues. So i told her that i take medications and have bipolar, to challenge the stigma she was feeling. We are friends, and also i don't care anymore if people at work find out because i've been there over a year and people know i'm stable and good at what i do. Anyways, she was like "wow, that's amazing! You are bipolar and a nurse practitioner." So i said "yes, recovery is possible. It's not us and them with the patients, 1 in 4 people have mental health issues at some point." So she thanked me for telling her, and i said it's cool, not a secret. It felt good. I've decided ***** stigma! Things won't change until people start showing that mental illness doesn't mean you fit the stereotypes. I can't expect my patients to accept their illnesses and themselves if i won't do the same. It feels pretty good.

Wow! That is such an amazing story! I have been thinking a lot about that lately. I address bipolar with diet, meditation, exercise, sleep habits, etc... And I end up in a lot of situations, especially about my diet, where people are like, 'so, how come you only eat meat and green vegetables and low glycemic fruits?' and I'm always dancing around it like 'I have allergies', 'I'm seeing a nutritionist', 'it helps with mental fog' etc... etc... And I am getting SOOO tired of it! Recently I told a very old friend that I am bipolar, and it actually helped both of us make so much sense out of many things from our past relations... I really want to be more open about it. As Omar from the Wire once said 'it ain't about no hidin' for ever'... Amen... Big ups to you!

[Manic Trance]

After a long hypomanic lift off, lots of drinking, smoking, sleeplessness, pressured speech, racing thoughts, mixed moods, some lows, but mainly highs, I think I may be leveling out. I am gradually changing my diet, getting some sleep and starting to feel less crazy. There were some NEAR misses in there with some REALLY irresponsible behaviors. There was this faint voice in there that was like 'pssst... maybe this is crazy?!'... Thank god for that! It got me back on the forum, cuz I knew what was happening, so happy to be back! Maybe I'll feel ok for a while. I've been mood tracking again too... Intermittently... :-/ Soon...
MT

[happywoman]

Originally Posted by Curiosity77

At work today one my social worker colleagues told me the she is struggling with adhd and low mood, and she is considering meds but is worried about stigma and side effects. She wanted my opinion on whether there was a med that could address both these issues, because I'm an NP, and she wanted my opinion on if she should take medication. So i made a med suggestion, and talked to her about pros and cons of meds. She was obviously struggling with stigma and feeling that as a social worker she should not have mental health issues. So i told her that i take medications and have bipolar, to challenge the stigma she was feeling. We are friends, and also i don't care anymore if people at work find out because i've been there over a year and people know i'm stable and good at what i do. Anyways, she was like "wow, that's amazing! You are bipolar and a nurse practitioner." So i said "yes, recovery is possible. It's not us and them with the patients, 1 in 4 people have mental health issues at some point." So she thanked me for telling her, and i said it's cool, not a secret. It felt good. I've decided ***** stigma! Things won't change until people start showing that mental illness doesn't mean you fit the stereotypes. I can't expect my patients to accept their illnesses and themselves if i won't do the same. It feels pretty good.

Thanks for this post. Admirable actions. I would like to have your courage and confidence.