Scared and in denial

Hi. I'm new to this forum and I wanted to know how people dealt with the initial diagnosis of bipolar disorder? I have been treated to severe clinical depression for months now and my doctor said that because I have not responded to any of the antidepressants, he will begin treating me for bipolar II. I have been on leave from work because I am exhausted and cannot deal with stress at this time. I am a youth and family counselor; will I be able to deal with the stress? I am frozen with anxiety!!!!!! I really don't know what the future will hold for me. I keep reading about life being fairly "normal" once I find the correct treatment. What does that mean? What are people's thoughts on working in high-stress jobs? I love my job but I just can't do it right now. Sorry about going on and on. I guess other people's input would be helpful; no matter what. Thanks!

hi thomi,

Welcome welcome to good ol PC!! Happy to have you hear. Personally no one has seen me on here because i am not diagnosed with Bipolar..but i havent been diagnosed at all yet..so i hope no one minds...i do read everyones post and give them great thought. Since no one posted for you yet, I thought id give it a go.
As for high stress leveled jobs, well if you love your job then i suggest you stick to it. If you wake up wanting to go to work then i say stick to it. It is rare and highly valuable if you love you job. And if you cant do it, maybe take a break. Get someone to fill in for you and take care of yourself. If you are healthy in mind and body, with your job, I am sure you and DEFINITLY your CLIENTS will be happier and better off in the end. Most jobs are highly stressful, either physically, mentally or both! I have a highly stressful job physically and i am battling with alot of pain too. My heart goes out to you, i am sure that your courage and strength with pull you through. Remember no matter what.. you have your friends here at PC. Good luck and keep us posted...
Your friend Inny

Thank you! I don't think there's anything wrong with not being diagnosed and posting on these forums. You are very encouraging. I hope you feel better soon. I have a chronic back issue and I go to a chiropractor now. Have you tried non-traditonal therapies like accupuncture? I have friends and coworkers who swear by it as a means to help with physical pain. Thank for the encouragement and take care!

Hi Thomi,

The right combination of medication and therapy can help you live a happy and productive life again. It often doesn't happen overnight, but it is possible.

I don't know if you'll be able to keep your high pressure job, but your pdoc and t will be able to help you in that decision.

Keep working with your psychiatrist, (pdoc) to get your meds right and seek out a good psychologist, (t).

I wish you well,

January

Hi there, I saw your post and said to myself, "yep, thats me too" lol, I've been told to take it real easy on myself and yes I know it's difficult when your head is like a mental hell, but thank god for this site huh? (no i'm not a religious freak either) I'm having huge difficulties with acceptance myself but it's so wonderful to have the support of people who know what we think and feel isnt it? I wish you the best in your journey thomi, be kind to yourself and never give up. I'm in the process of getting my medication back on track and I know how you feel. Many a time I have felt like a guinea pig for the medical profession, but yes, we are individual and eventually there will be the right combination of happy pills for you. Thats what I call my tablets, ha! Big hugs to you mate, take it day by day or even 5 minutes at a time if you have to, works for me xxx

Welcome to PC Thomi. It must be very frightening to not be able to work right now. Sometimes it takes a while to get the right combination of meds. As the meds start to work maybe you can work with your pdoc to decide what type of stress you will be able to withstand and remain stable. People have successfully worked high stress jobs while others find it too triggering. The important thing is to take care of you. Take care and I am glad you found the site.

I, too, was treated for unipolar depression before being dxed wityh bipolar 1. It took about a year of trial & error before finding the right meds for me (I take lots). I also went into therapy. I had to change from a high-stress job to a low-stress part-time job. I just wasn't capable of living under all that stress anymore. There will be life adjustments to make as you learn how to handle bp.

Realize there is hope, but it might take awhile to get you to a stable place & then you do have to take the responsibility of doing what is needed to maintain wellness.

Glad you are here.--Suzy

Dear Thomi,
I wanted to bump up this thread for you and others to respond.
I am new here as well.
I want to encourage you to be patient with all of this, with yourself.
Unfortunately there are no quick fixes.
Fall down 7 times get up 8....
What I am learning is that my issues are seperate from my bipolar.
Treat them seperately.
Treat the bipolar with meds(your pdoc) and
deal with your issues with your therapist(tdoc).

Always remember that you are a person first
who happens to have mental health issues as well.

Welcome
this is definately the place for on-line support!
bizi

Hello Thomi! I'm brand new here too and I'm glad I found this forum.

I'm also BP II, rapid cycler. My short and sweet piece of advice is to just relax and ease into your feelings, because things will get better again! I cycle about once every four years, for several months, and wow is it a nightmare. I have to put everything on hold, which gets scarier as I get older. But it does taper off, and it's also easier every time. the nasty feelings become familiar and easier to cope with. Like, "oh, hey, crippling anxiety! i remember you, and last time I KICKED YOUR ***!" then, after tinkering with meds, therapy, and a real desire to get better, you do!

i find that when i'm really doing badly, like "i can't go on" badly, it's very helpful to micromanage. if you are overwhelmed at the thought of going to work in the morning, just concentrate on getting out of bed. then take a shower. then try making dinner.

it's a scary and difficult time, just take baby steps and don't panic (ha ha)!

Hi, Thomi...

Actually, you're kind of lucky; many of us had to go through years (10, in my case) of treatment for depression before being correctly diagnosed. You're starting down a path that will lead through many places, some good, some not. I was a youth and family minister...I had to quit because I could no longer do the kind of planning and follow-through that the job required. Now I'm on disability, but I am going to school, so there's hope! I hope things get better for you...no, I KNOW things will get better!

DJ