Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 11:36 PM
HB.Operandi HB.Operandi is offline
New Member
 
Member Since: Nov 2014
Location: California
Posts: 7
I lost my last relationship to my illness; and at the time I was afraid of doctors and was not yet ready to admit to myself that I needed help.

Now I am in treatment/recovery and am working on getting myself grounded.

Yet recently I've felt the flutters of my heart once more- but now I'm afraid that my BP will make any sort of romance a BAD idea.

I know that I need to work on myself, and I know that I am not yet ready for a relationship...but this unrequited crush really bugs me.

Any thoughts?

~Anna
Hugs from:
Crazy Hitch, Sinking Feeling, ~Christina

advertisement
  #2  
Old Nov 13, 2014, 12:27 AM
Crazy Hitch's Avatar
Crazy Hitch Crazy Hitch is online now
ɘvlovƎ
 
Member Since: Nov 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 27,531
You're hesitant because of past experiences that you have had which leave you with a sense of vulnerability.

If you were, hypothetically, to get into a relationship, don't jump into it all gung-ho with an all or nothing approach.

Step back and take it easy, one step at a time.

You may want to consider telling this person that you're working on some issues right now and you are positive that you are going to make progress, without having to disclose a diagnosis from the get go. If the relationship does start developing into something a bit more serious, you may not be able to hide this very well. But by giving soft hints at first, the message might be received more readily later on.

Just a thought.
Thanks for this!
Trippin2.0
  #3  
Old Nov 13, 2014, 02:00 AM
~Christina's Avatar
~Christina ~Christina is offline
Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
 
Member Since: Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
So it's likely that your next relationship or a date is going to be much better as you are taking care of yourself mentally.

Dating does not always lead to a relationship, Dating can just be dating and meeting new people and having a good time.
__________________
Helping others gets me out of my own head ~
Thanks for this!
Trippin2.0
  #4  
Old Nov 13, 2014, 04:10 AM
Wander's Avatar
Wander Wander is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Jul 2014
Location: Milky Way
Posts: 4,746
One year ago my bipolar husband and I divorced as the relationship just made us both more unwell. It was really tough going through that break up. Four months ago I felt that I was in no way ready for a relationship yet on a whim said yes to a guy who asked me out on a date; we are still together. One month into this new relationship I became severely depressed and went into hospital for ECT. That was a big test on our relationship and we made it through. He has been very understanding of my illness and has even read up on it and asked me lots of questions. He visited me almost every day that I was in hospital (I was in for a month) which really helped. I still don't know if I am ready for a relationship yet here I am. We are taking it really, really slow which is helping me heal and adjust. You can just go on a date and see how you feel. Only you know what is best for you right now. I wish you all the best.
__________________
Bipolar 1 with psychotic features
PTSD




"Phew! For a minute there I lost myself."

'Karma Police' by Radiohead
Thanks for this!
Trippin2.0
  #5  
Old Nov 13, 2014, 02:43 PM
Justugh Justugh is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Oct 2014
Location: maryland
Posts: 478
i am guy ......i am going to say this in guy terms .....i mean it nicely

1 guys love crazy lady (we know all ladies are crazy anyways but the ones that have a doctors note we love) ........it comes down to alot of things but the basic of it is better sex and we can win arguments now and then

2 if u like the guy then feel him out on some tester ?s ........if u see something coming out of it then tell him the truth once u are ready and then u have someone back u up

i dated a few ladies over the years with troubles .....i am friends with all but one of them (one stole alot of money from me and then tried to have me locked up)

if u get to a point where he is your BF ..........train him to help u with whatever your triggers are (few times the ladies have hit bottom and called me up to help them out .........1 of them even saved my butt a few times)
  #6  
Old Nov 13, 2014, 03:00 PM
~Christina's Avatar
~Christina ~Christina is offline
Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
 
Member Since: Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
Quote:
Originally Posted by Justugh View Post
i am guy ......i am going to say this in guy terms .....i mean it nicely

1 guys love crazy lady (we know all ladies are crazy anyways but the ones that have a doctors note we love) ........it comes down to alot of things but the basic of it is better sex and we can win arguments now and then

2 if u like the guy then feel him out on some tester ?s ........if u see something coming out of it then tell him the truth once u are ready and then u have someone back u up

i dated a few ladies over the years with troubles .....i am friends with all but one of them (one stole alot of money from me and then tried to have me locked up)

if u get to a point where he is your BF ..........train him to help u with whatever your triggers are (few times the ladies have hit bottom and called me up to help them out .........1 of them even saved my butt a few times)
Could you please explain your statement that "all ladies are crazy and the ones with a Doctors note we love"

I would love to hear the logic behind this .... Thank you
__________________
Helping others gets me out of my own head ~
Thanks for this!
Trippin2.0
  #7  
Old Nov 13, 2014, 03:52 PM
Justugh Justugh is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Oct 2014
Location: maryland
Posts: 478
Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Christina View Post
Could you please explain your statement that "all ladies are crazy and the ones with a Doctors note we love"

I would love to hear the logic behind this .... Thank you
guys are ruled by logic........it might be messed up logic but still logic (guys think in strait lines)

ladies are ruled by emotion........your feel it is something and u react (ladies think with curved lines)

this was a classical debate .....both male and female come to the same answer but they do it with 2 different methods

to guys all ladies are nutty because we can not understand why u do what u do ( your emotions) .......... it has been like this forever it is where alot of the fights come from because one side does not understand the thinking of the other
  #8  
Old Nov 13, 2014, 03:59 PM
Justugh Justugh is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Oct 2014
Location: maryland
Posts: 478
as for guys ........we have 5 things that makes us move
food /beer
family/friends
money
sex.....drugs(but that is the chemical effect of sex )
love

if u look at any of the actions a guy does it will link back to one of those 5 things .........that is how simple we are
  #9  
Old Nov 13, 2014, 04:25 PM
~Christina's Avatar
~Christina ~Christina is offline
Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
 
Member Since: Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
Quote:
Originally Posted by Justugh View Post
guys are ruled by logic........it might be messed up logic but still logic (guys think in strait lines)

ladies are ruled by emotion........your feel it is something and u react (ladies think with curved lines)

this was a classical debate .....both male and female come to the same answer but they do it with 2 different methods

to guys all ladies are nutty because we can not understand why u do what u do ( your emotions) .......... it has been like this forever it is where alot of the fights come from because one side does not understand the thinking of the other
Your painting people in just broad strokes.. Not all men think just Logic, same as all women do not just think emotional.

Not all guys think Women are "Nutty "

I think I will just bow out of any conversations with you from this point on.

I wish you the best
__________________
Helping others gets me out of my own head ~
Thanks for this!
Trippin2.0
  #10  
Old Nov 13, 2014, 04:59 PM
Justugh Justugh is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Oct 2014
Location: maryland
Posts: 478
Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Christina View Post
Your painting people in just broad strokes.. Not all men think just Logic, same as all women do not just think emotional.

Not all guys think Women are "Nutty "

I think I will just bow out of any conversations with you from this point on.

I wish you the best
i mean it in a good way

and i am only using what i have seen with my own eyes ........ma'am i have done research covering this subject

it comes down to the mid brain females have a 30% larger mid brain then males ..........this gives u better access to both sides of the brain at the same time allowing emotion to be the ruling factor in thinking

this is also part of the reason females have always had the stronger psychic skills and the true ones that show up are always females .......this goes back tho history and folktales along with what i seen (and i understand micro expressions face reading and the skills of cold reading with key ?s)

it is just a genetic fact of being a female ........it is pretty cool
this is the reason males have trouble with feelings and emotions they do not have the connections in the head .......something that comes easy to u is hard for us

and just so i am not called a pig or something bad understand all the cultures active on the planet think like that minus one Hindi under their logic there is 5 sexes recognizing what i am talking about and factor in not everyone is the same
masculine female
feminine female
masculine male
feminine male
hermaphrodite..........they are treated like living gods

and hindi culture is one of the oldest ones around
  #11  
Old Nov 13, 2014, 11:07 PM
HALLIEBETH87's Avatar
HALLIEBETH87 HALLIEBETH87 is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Oct 2004
Location: usa
Posts: 11,934
There are many many arguments I could make to what I just read but Im not going to.
Thanks for this!
~Christina
  #12  
Old Nov 14, 2014, 01:44 AM
Crazy Hitch's Avatar
Crazy Hitch Crazy Hitch is online now
ɘvlovƎ
 
Member Since: Nov 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 27,531
Quote:
Originally Posted by HALLIEBETH87 View Post
There are many many arguments I could make to what I just read but Im not going to.
Yip. I second that.
Thanks for this!
~Christina
  #13  
Old Nov 14, 2014, 01:55 AM
Sinking Feeling's Avatar
Sinking Feeling Sinking Feeling is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Sep 2014
Location: Rochester
Posts: 428
Don't get down on yourself, I'm bipolar and some times I feel like I would be a curse to anyone I get close too. You deserve to be happy too! Evberyone has ups and downs. Sure you can be a handful, I once dated a bipolar girl, she got crazier then me, like any relationship, yes we had a relationship, there were ups and downs. I broke it off, I felt the need to move on, we all get that feeling too.

Try not to think in terms of black and white, it's not so clear cut and we are in no worse or better position when it comes to dating or relationships. There are plenty of "normal" people that I simply don't like and would NOT want to be around them. Just get out there and get your feet wet.

Justugh, I'd quit while your ahead or still have a head lol, your swimming in dangers waters there buddy
Thanks for this!
Trippin2.0, ~Christina
Reply
Views: 1132

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 04:40 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.