[Mehiguess]

I posted about a month ago about my experience with respiradol and seroquel. Couldnt take them because of bad reactions. Celexa too. So I've tried haldol and couldnt take that. Got up to 2mg and had akathisia so bad I could no longer sleep. Then was given lamictal. I took 12.5mg instead of 25. That night I woke up with palpitations so bad they hurt and I kept losing consciousness. I have ativan for anxiety but it did nothing to help. So I'm still unable to take anything. My anxiety is now so bad that I will faint if I don't do something immediately. I lost my job for good after I got haldol. I see my psychiatrist on the 30th and I have no idea what he's going to do or say. I don't understand why I can't take anything! Or why my anxiety is just getting worse and worse. My therapist told me to not work. But I need money for medicine and appointments. I'm applying for help but I'm told I don't qualify as I'm not "disabled" and Im just left here going????? I'm so screwed up from everything I haven't slept normally in over a month. I keep wanting to go to the er for help but what can they do. My life seems really pointless and I'm tired of this. I can't even get to therapeutic levels to see if anything even helps me. I have to quit my everything after the first few doses because I end up passing out or unable to sleep for a week and crying and wanting to die.

[Mehiguess]

I'm sorry this is so badly written but I'm at a loss and don't get why I can't take a single thing without the worst possible thing happening. I'm not imagining it either. I wonder all the time if I'm making it up or just scared but I don't believe I am. The haldol was fine for me I just couldn't sleep and felt like I was vibrating. But I stopped seeing things and hearing stuff. I didn't feel any different but that was the first time something good had happened. I was devastated when I was told I couldn't take it. Surely there is medicine to counteract akathisia? I mean they have medicine to counteract every other side effect right? I feel robbed of any quality of life I had before medicine. I was never this bad. All that's happened is I've gotten worse and now I have no income and all that se things that need done and I can't afford it. But I'm not sick enough or "too high functioning" to recieve any help. I don't get what is high functioning about me right now. I can't do anything!!!!!

[Wanderlust90]

I've been stuck in the same place. Sick but "not sick enough"

[B2008]

Try researching ssri's and bipolar. What I've experienced and found is they don't mix and have read they can do permanent damage in bipolar. Actually causing manic, anxiety, aggravation and lots of tears. I went through 8 years of misdiagnosed with depression celexa, Ativan,Xanax are only a few of what I was on and it was hell the whole time. I currently take depakote because it's the cheapest I'm so much better but have only been diagnosed for a month. Bipolar is a malfunctionI of the GABA in the brain not seritonin. The hospital where I'm at also has doctors offices and psyc docs affiliated along with sliding fees. We have four kids and I stay home as I haven't been able to work for 4 years. Partially due to birth of two children. So I get 100% coverage. We cannot afford insurance for whole family. I'm not sure I'll ever be at to go back so we cut corners as much as possible. U can get on disability for mental illness u just have to prove how bad it is, and have the right doctor. As in one that really understands. I have a few family members on it due to mental illness.

[Blue_Bird]

You may want to get a physical and some blood work done by your GP, there could be an underlying cause for the fainting. I never heard of psych meds causing one to lose consciousness, that's alarming. It could be a freaky rare side effect but get it checked out just to be sure, then you can pursue a psychiatrists opinion.

[B2008]

The anxiety causes u to faint or blackout. Panic attacks are very scary. Environmental control worked best for me but that included stop working and make sure my home was a controlled environment which the hubby helped a lot

[Blue_Bird]

I still standby what I said, if you're having painful heart palpitations and passing out it is still best to get physical issues ruled out first, that's common sense for any possible psych issue

[B2008]

I was just offering up another idea of why. Didn't mean for it to read like they shouldn't get checked out. Of course that's always number one

[BeyondtheRainbow]

There are meds to treat akathesia. Cogentin is the most common. If it is really bad they use a combination of cogentin and gabapentin (Neurontin). I'm not sure if they do that one and let you stay on the med though; when I needed both it was an unbearable akathesia caused by something given during surgery and nothing, including combinations of high doses of several APs and benzos together, would give me even a little break, much less stop it. And so I wound up IP and put on that combination but since I wasn't taking whatever caused it in the first place I don't know if I could have tried to stay on it had it been a "real" med for me.

I know it is so hard to go through so much to get a med to work. I've been there. Still am; if I don't have an absolute miracle in the next 3 weeks I'll be going into the hospital to get off the Seroquel that worked for me for 8 years (but was the first drug that really did and it took many years to get to it) and to go on another med that is the "med of last resort" because of side effects. I have been on at least 40 meds in 69 combinations (not including dose changes) since I started meds in 1997.

But I have had meds that worked. It took some unusual combinations and dosages and a lot of trial and error but we found things that helped. I've never been stable (I had one year that was somewhat close, at least for me) but I've been controlled as long as we stayed on top of med changes and made them pretty much monthly to keep where I needed to be. This last year that quit working and I feel like I've lost years of progress but I do know that eventually something will help you. It may require creative thinking and a pdoc who specializes in hard to treat cases but it can happen. My med list is a weird one but until a year ago it was doing the best meds can do for me (I don't get the benefits I wish I got but I do get enough to function and feel fairly well).

So there is hope. I know it's hard to go on meds and have them not work but if you keep trying them (and my experience was that trying very low doses first is important for me) someday something will work at least somewhat and you'll start to find what works for you. I know some people would think that taking the number of meds I do is wrong but I wound up with a lot of trial and error finding out I need a lot of Seroquel, a lot of Emsam, and a very little amount of some other stabilizers. Any change in that and I get worse.

You'll find what works for you. Just keep trying and don't give up. I know how hard that is (believe me, right now with really one drug left to go before I don't know what and that drug is a scary one, I am terrified to see the 21st approach as that's my deadline for our last ditch attempt at seeing if a tiny bit of lithium helps before giving up and doing the probably inevitable huge change and I don't want to do it) but hanging in there is the only way I've found to get through med resistance issues. It sucks and I'm sorry you have to do it.

[Moogieotter]

I think Depakote is a good call. Fast-acting, a strong stabilizer. I had to power through a few weeks of Akathisia for both Abilify and Latuda. 3-4 weeks of bad leg stuff at night, but it was worth it - high calories at bedtime helped, esp deli turkey and chocolate ovaltine.

Are you drinking or using street drug at all? These can make nearly all meds ineffective.

Good luck,

moogs

[kimber1234]

I feel for you! I am taking so many meds just to counteract side-effects from my BP meds. It's ridiculous.

!Check your Thyroid as that can screw up EVERYTHING, whether overactive or hypoactive thyroid, you need to stay on top of it. I'm a huge proponent of this since my brother died of over-active thyroid at 27. When I was finally medicated for it, the MASSIVE LIFE INTERRUPTING anxiety calmed down; unfortunately, it takes a while- like everything- to stabilize. I still had to take Klonopin or Xanax for acute anxiety attacks. Please make sure you check it out. It sounds like you have many symptoms I had before I got my thyroid taken care of.

Gambepentin has worked well for my underlying anxiety. It made me SUPER tired at first. Now, it gives me a general calm feeling (most of the time).

I didn't see whether or not you tried Lithium. That is the general BP go to. It helped me get steady, but it took all my manic creativity away. It sounds like just getting the BP under control is primary and this may be worth a try.

My experience for sleep issues:
Seroquel (which sounds like a no-no for you)
Abilify (worth a try but akin to seroquel)
Trazadone (I stopped taking it because I "slept ate-" actually kind of funny when you can't figure out where the food you got went)
Massive doses of anti-anxiety meds
Sleep aid like Lunesta or Ambien (also sleep-eating with ambien)

I hope this helps.

GOOD LUCK and keep us posted!!!!!

[Mehiguess]

I don't drink or do any kind of drugs. I haven't been able to see am actual doctor in years. Ive never had the money and never been able to work enough to afford to pay for it. I know I need a doctor but i just can't go for all the things I need checked and I was told i was going to get worse so seeing a psychiatrist was priority and cheaper. But now I can't afford anything and I see him on Monday. I don't know what hes going to suggest. He thinks i make things up and I tell him I can't afford to do all these things I need. I feel stuck. He seems to laugh at me when I come in and I don't know if its because he thinks I'm just afraid of medicine or if he thinks I'm an idiot. I don't know what he could possibly suggest to me now because he's telling me I'm hard to treat and he's just trying things on me now. It isn't reasurring and I've apparently wasted a lot of money on this. I was told I would be fine on medicine. I just can't do all the things I need and no one can help me.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Have you applied for Medicaid? Or SSI/SSDI if you can't manage working enough to have enough money to cope? Once you get SSI medicaid is automatic and SSDI medicare is automatic.

Have you tried to find a clinic with sliding fees like community mental health or other agencies? You'd probably have to endure a waiting list but you'd get another chance at a psychiatrist and they can help with finding ways to make healthcare more affordable so you can get checked out and get labs and the like. There are programs but it's hard to know how to find them.

You can be and will eventually be fine on meds but it's a trial and error process for many of us. They should have explained that part.

If you go to an ER they are obligated to treat you regardless of ability to pay. All they are required to do is stabilize you so it wouldn't solve everything but if you are having chest pains definitely go get checked; it won't cost anything and chest pains are scary. Depending on the hospital they might also be able to help you get set up with some services.

I know it is hard. Sticking it out through not having insurance, not responding to meds, etc. has been a huge challenge for me at different times too (I was able to find a hospital that provided care for free for everything when I needed it. Rare but it does exist). I'm sorry it has to be SO hard. It's just not fair.

[kimber1234]

Originally Posted by Mehiguess

...I know I need a doctor but i just can't go for all the things I need checked and I was told i was going to get worse so seeing a psychiatrist was priority and cheaper. ...

Have you pdoc, who sounds like a jerk, that you'd like HIM to write the prescriptions for the lab work- especially a thyroid and pituitary glands checked. This save you a trip and $ to your GP.

[Permacultural]

Ever try depakote?

[B2008]

I take depakote twice daily. Newly diagnosed so don't know how well this med helps others. I use a simple savings card which is a free prescription saving card u can just google it and sign up. U don't even have to wait for card in mail just show pharmacy a pic. 60 tabs of depakote is only 22.00 at Walmart. (I have no other insurance just simple savings card). It also drops my other med 23.00 down to 7.50. It covers tons of medications and is the best free savings card I have found yet. It's worth a try. Hope this is helpful.

[B2008]

Simple Savings Card
Free prescription savings card.
https://www.simplesavingscard.com

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Rx Outreach | Patient Assistance Program, Discount Prescription Drugs and www.xubec.com have discounted meds, often greatly discounted. Rxoutreach has been much more useful for me.

Prices, Coupons and Information - GoodRx lets you compare prices between different pharmacies and gives any available coupons to you right on the site.

I'd use goodrx first to trial drugs and then try to buy it through the other programs if possible. I've had drugs come down 80% or more on rxoutreach.