Have you ever been abusive as a result of BP?

I've been abused, bullied, etc, and I've reacted back, most times negatively.

I'm sure some people consider my reactions abusive, or maybe not.

I've never gone out of my way to hurt others though, I try my hardest to abide by my golden rule: treat others the way you want to be treated.

But sometimes that isn't possible. And when I feel it gets to that point I'd rather remove myself from the situation than make it worse by trying to push people back or get revenge.

Are you really going to blame me for your feelings?

So you tried somewhat to deal with your bad traits, it failed, so you give up and go on with it?

Your doctor might call it what he or she wants... after all it's not like he or she call it "abusive episode". Many people are manic without going all out abusive. And what you described in OP seems more like planned, intricate abusive behavior rather then getting obnoxious or hurting others because of your episodes, because you haven't been thinking about what you are doing.

I really didn't know I was being abusive at the time though. It wasn't planned. It just kinda happened. I was oblivious as to my actions until one of his friends told me off.

Hey escapeartist (love the name it fits me too).
I've done some real ****** things over the years & feel like **** about it. I've smashed dishes & yelled. Usually it was during an episode. Add too much booze and it's like an instant episode. It's not about being a good or bad person. You are not a horrible person! You're looking for help & understanding & searching your soul.
Looking at our dark side is also called shadow work & can be really useful. It's not for everyone & that's ok. It's something I'm learning about. It's like mindfulness, see the different aspects to our self without judging. Without acting immediately on them. And of course you know, trying to do our best & harm none.
I like Taoist idea of finding your center in the hurricane of life & people. And for someone with bp that hurricane can be in our mind too. Find your center & be there. It's all part of your soul path. To me I see you reflecting on past, try to process so you can learn but don't dwell & get stuck there. I personally have grown from spending time in my regrets, but also stunted my growth from dwelling too long in them. Sending love.

No, there is never an excuse to be abusive. That's part of what I was saying.. The second part is that acting in an "abusive" fashion is a bad behavior slip that I don't believe anyone is immune to.... have you never gotten in to an argument and ended up flying off the handle and ended up reeming someone out?...acting abusive doesn't nessecarily make you an abusive or even bad person. It can simply be a temporary lapse in judgement that leads to an inappropriate or insensitive response that is uncalled for and leaves another feeling crappy. * Note that I am not saying it is EVER ok, nor am I meaning in ANY WAY to trivialize or condone abuse! I am merely stating that if someone can identify that they are or have behaved badly toward another and wishes they hadn't..... That makes us Human not Abusive.

escapeartist - Don't worry. I guess I have a "dark" side too. I'm not perfect either. I've never been abusive to my husband, but in my early twenties I was a real *** to one of my boyfriends. At the time I was really ****ed up and hurting on the inside from a past relationship where I was abused. It was just messed up. I felt bad about it for years. Still do in all honesty. He did break up with me at least. Hugs.

(This situation wasn't related to bp.)