[xxblackrosesxx]

I don't ****ing attention seek. My mother said she didn't find anything wrong with me when she looked at my facebook. Of course she doesn't because I don't want to display my emotions on facebook but she thinks I attention seek by self harming? No I don't attention seek. I don't plan like "HAHAHAH I'M GOING TO FU CKING ATTNETION SEEK BY CUTTING MY ARM WITH A KNIFE AHAHAHAHAHAHA BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE SO FUNNY." Just go away mum. She said there is nothing wrong with me. So I feel like everything I do is normal and ok but then she goes and says "you're spending too much time in your room" Well if you aid there is nothing wrong with me and spending time in my room is normal I will do it and everything that must seem normal that I tried to keep to myself for a long time. Everything must be fine then. EVERYTHING IS FINE HAHA

[Icare dixit]

Seek attention for your problems in a healthy way and you probably feel less need for unhealthy expression.

Healthy expression, such as explaining why you do have problems, is difficult, but it can help.

I do think self-hurting is a way to explain, or justify or proof, to yourself (and possibly others) that you have problems. Like there must be physical pain when suffering. It's a way of expression. I think all self-damaging/-sabotaging is like that. A need for more apparent, more tangible challenges. I believe it is looking for more clear difficulties.

I believe it's a way to reduce confusion, (sometimes) a feeling of losing control and consequently anxiety. It's soothing.

But you may also channel frustration in other ways. Even looking at destruction helps, I've found. Maybe boxing. Buying stuff to completely destroy. That's also calming.

Accept you deserve attention without self-damaging behaviour.

I'm not saying it's easy, but that's how I try to lessen the frustration and confusion.

It's just a theory but may be better than no theory at all.

Of course, all this may not apply to you.

[cincidak]

Why do you think you self harm? I did it because of psychosis , and obession. I couldn't not self harm. I used to cut the bottoms of my feet. Every time I took a step it would hurt for days afterward. Once I got on the right medications I stopped doing it. Maybe Seroquel isn't the right medication for you. I see you are also on an antidepressant. They can exacerbate mania sometimes. You should probably speak to your Dr about these feelings and maybe talk to a therapist since your mom isn't listening. Maybe have her also talk to your therapist separately and together. That's what I would do. She isn't listening so find someone, like a therapist who will. I hope this helps. Prayers are with you.

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[ComfortablyNumb5]

Most of our closest family is in denial and want to think of any excuse to justify our actions. My dad will never come to terms with my illness and he sees it as an excuse for failure. At this point I just stopped talking to him about it. He can be a trigger for me so I sweep it under the rug around him, like he has. And you're right about facebook. Just because you don't display your emotions to the public, doesn't mean they're unreal or not there. I feel for you. I'm guessing you're pretty young so maybe move out on your own in a few years and find more supportive people to surround yourself with.

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[Crazy Hitch]

Agree with you (((roses))) - nothing on my facebook has anything about my MI ... I'm very selective about who knows I'm BP - and facebook, for me personally, is simply not the platform that I advertise my episodes on.

i wish i had a good peace of advice to give you.

but don't

i was unfortunate enough to be born in to a family where they don't accept illness as a real thing.

their's have been times, for example, where other family members have been in a coma- and mym other would say well, it's just in their heads.. they are fine really

shut out now

ah well

has it's advantages

((((hugs))))))

[xxblackrosesxx]

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

i wish i had a good peace of advice to give you.

but don't

i was unfortunate enough to be born in to a family where they don't accept illness as a real thing.

their's have been times, for example, where other family members have been in a coma- and mym other would say well, it's just in their heads.. they are fine really

shut out now

ah well

has it's advantages

((((hugs))))))

yeah i really hate it. (hugs back)

[xxblackrosesxx]

Ahh frick another shameful post so sorry

My parents also think there is nothing wrong with me. That's why I didn't get help for my BP until I was 24, despite having BP symptoms at 11 years old.

My parents don't think I "attention seek" per se, but they definitely think I "over-exaggerate". So, they're not too accepting of mental illness.

Anyway, don't worry about your post being "shameful". It's not.

I would probably be very hurt if I found out my parents thought this. This is a terrible thing to be accused of when it's untrue. A potentially deadly thing because how are you going to get real help from them if they think this. It's shameful on their behalf and shame on them. They probably don't know better. I'm guessing you've tried and failed to educate them on many occasions. (((Hugs)))

[RomanJames2014]

I totally understand what you are going through. I have had nothing but denial, doubt, and bullying from my family about coming out bipolar. They dont believe in it and they think that I am just doing it for the attention so I dont tell anyone about it anymore.
Hope you find friends and company that can help you though this struggle.

[st0psign]

the whole attention seeking thing infuriates me... I'm fortunate my parents understand BP (my mom is BP II, and her dad was a I) so luckily I don't get it from them when I do self harm. but I know its a pretty common idea people get, and when I hear it I just wanna knock someone's block off.