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#1
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Do any of you suffer with ideas of reference? Hearing, reading or seeing things and feeling they are direct messages to you? My doctor gave me a name for this symptom.
I'm having some trouble with the internet, books and tv, even my iTunes causes it. This has been a major and ongoing problem of mine and I've been able to skirt by, but it's really depressing to know how many things I've gotten wrong in my life and people I've accused when I shouldn't. I want to send out apology letters to soooooo many people because of it. Anyone relate? It's really held me back in life. |
![]() Anonymous45023
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#2
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Yes, I do relate. But it's not the worst of my problems: I have it during mania/psychosis but there isn't much "left" when stable and on meds. It doesn't interfere (much) with my functioning, generally.
I think it derived from other, underlying, problems, delusions/rationalisations, mainly delusion of grandeur (but more broadly interpreted: anything psychotic, not "psychotic", is per se inexpressible/intangible).
__________________
Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide. See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me. |
![]() Anonymous59125
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#3
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I think mine is related to early childhood bullying but I'm not sure. Anytime I'm in a group, it gets worse.
My doc said it was psychosis but in my case, I'm not sure. I think PTSD might cause it. It's so complicated but I guess since the meds help, I should just thank my stars. |
#4
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I'm glad the meds help you. I took a couple weeks for mine to really take effect but they are doing an ok job now. Still a floater hanging around from time to time but mostly all gone. We are lucky meds help.
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![]() Icare dixit
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#5
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Quote:
I really gives so much hope. I'm glad they work for you for the most part. Just keep taking them. There's enough problems you may tackle now, maybe like these, things that can be solved by reason, room for doubt and steady, directed, focused determination. I'm sure you'll figure it out. ![]()
__________________
Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide. See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me. |
![]() Anonymous59125
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#6
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I've "experienced" things that I believed were direct messages to me. For example, I might have done something I shouldn't have (out of sheer stupidity). Then later on, I might be working on something and it goes completely wrong. I then think it was a direct message to me to remind me that I f***ed up earlier, and that what I'm getting is payback. It is a "deserved" punishment.
I think mine is more paranoia related, and it happens during hypo/mania. I don't know if that's what you're talking about though. |
#7
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I get that too blue bicycle. I also think they messages are being sent to get me to kill myself. It's very distressing. (((Hugs)))
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![]() Icare dixit
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#8
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Yes, but I really believe in 'signs' I also get some of what blue bicycle was saying, but more so when i was younger, not so much now. The 'signs' I get tend to be positive, so I am not concerned about it.
__________________
"Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it" -Mark Twain |
![]() Anonymous59125
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#9
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that's a symptom I haven't had... yet. each manic or mixed episode brings something new recently though.
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Bipolar 1 with mixed and psychotic symptoms & ADHD Meds Latuda 120mg Lamictal 200mg Haldol 5mg (+5mg during mixed episodes) Vyvanse 40mg morning 20mg noon Benztropine 0.5mg |
![]() Anonymous59125
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#10
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I have this during some episodes , once very severe but not in between.
__________________
I used to rule the world Seas would rise when I gave the word Now in the morning, I sleep alone Sweep the streets I used to own I used to roll the dice Feel the fear in my enemy's eyes Listen as the crowd would sing Now the old king is dead! Long live the king! One minute I held the key Next the walls were closed on me And I discovered that my castles stand Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand |
![]() Anonymous59125
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#11
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I call these omens.
They can be good or bad, but well... I look for omens, so of course I see them. I don't feel it's an illness symptom for me either.
__________________
Glory to heroes!
HATEFREE CULTURE |
![]() Anonymous59125
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#12
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I feel like things happen in front of me for a reason and I need to take the time to read into it. Makes me paranoid actually.
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![]() Anonymous59125
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#13
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Yes this happens, but my interpretation of these experiences have changed over time. Religious or spiritual vision, psychic experience, meaning-making, hallucination, omens, a message to myself. I didn't have a name for this experience until now, thanks.
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![]() Anonymous59125
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#14
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I see them as psychic messages too. As a for instance: I'm listening to a book on tape. Sometimes his voice changes and I can tell he's talking directly to me. Sometimes things are good but mostly his voice distorts into something condescending and he's sending me a message that what he's talking about will happen to me. The book isn't scary, but mean things happen in it and it's been scary. Or I read something online and I'm sure it's a warning to me. Sometimes the warnings are helpful, but they always keep me in my house. I don't leave because I've been warned too many times not to. I'm battling against if it real and means something, or unchecked psychosis. Sometimes even when stable I worry I have special powers. But why are they hell bent on keeping me inside. Is it really that dangerous for me out there. I don't really want to find out and that's my problem. Ugggg.
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#15
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Quote:
This is the way that mine tend to be as well. |
![]() Anonymous59125
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#16
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I get the part about "keeping me inside" because I have to deliberately fight against that or I might just not go or do anything. Like that old nightmare I used to have as a kid about running but not going anywhere.
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![]() Anonymous59125
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#17
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I get this as well. It started when I developed psychosis. Even though I have recovered the ideas of reference never disappeared. Medication has helped, and so has sleeping and eating well.
My ideas of reference have a visual component to them. The image, word or object becomes prominent and wavy. When this happens I cannot ignore it. One of my most recent experiences happened on public transit. Another passenger sitting in front of me was wearing some jewelry with a face on it. The face suddenly came alive and stared at me. Someone from another dimension was trying to communicate with me again.
__________________
Dx: Didgee Disorder |
![]() Anonymous59125
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