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#26
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Went to my DBT group today, it went well, some stuff made me laugh at least, so there's that. Mood is still the same, depressed, laying in bed right now and watching TV, cooking shows to be exact. Blah, got a headache, and just waiting for it to possibly rain tonight...
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Wir sind was wir sind English We are what we are MDD w/psychotic features, BPD |
![]() Anonymous45023, Anonymous59125
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#27
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I have been ok for quite a while but this last week I feel I am slipping again.
I have not had a good nights sleep in a week and I am starting to feel depressed. This happened a few weeks ago and only lasted a few days so I hope it will pass quickly and I don't slip into a serious depression.
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I traded it in for a whole 'nother world A pirate flag and an island girl |
![]() Anonymous45023, Anonymous59125, gina_re, OctobersBlackRose, pirilin, Takeshi
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#28
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No sleep last night. I hate having to be quiet when the rest of the household is sleeping
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![]() Anonymous45023, OctobersBlackRose, pirilin, Wander
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#29
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Feeling so angry and depressed.
Decided to suck it up and admit that I'm under medicated,and for once I'm really craving stability. True stability. I decided that I wanted to go back on lithium. I'm ready. Therapist says, " good for you. I think you should" Boyfriend says, "No." Just flat out. ![]() Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
![]() Anonymous45023, Icare dixit, Nammu, OctobersBlackRose, pirilin
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#30
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Quote:
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]Roses are red. Violets are blue.[ Look for the positive in the negative. PIRILON. If lemons fall from the sky, make lemonade. Unknown. Nothing stronger than habit. Victor Hugo. You are the slave of what you say, and the master of what you keep. Unknown. |
![]() Coconutzo
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#31
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Quote:
For me it's just a normal day so far.
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>< |
![]() Coconutzo
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#32
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I was going to type some stupidity, and since I'm here, I will.
I started winning again. I'm sure it was your hugs and good wishes. But I have to admit I'm losing my balls now. I don't want to risk what I've made in the last day. I've being playin not-to-lose instead of my regular in-ur-face game. That is why I'm basically here and not at the tables. Strentgh, balls, cojones, or similar. Please, send soon.
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]Roses are red. Violets are blue.[ Look for the positive in the negative. PIRILON. If lemons fall from the sky, make lemonade. Unknown. Nothing stronger than habit. Victor Hugo. You are the slave of what you say, and the master of what you keep. Unknown. |
![]() Anonymous59125, Nammu, OctobersBlackRose
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#33
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Thanks guys! I was appalled at how serious he was about MY decision!
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
![]() Anonymous59125, pirilin
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#34
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I want to die, but not actually die. Know what I mean? Mostly, I wish I didn't exist.
I can't concentrate, so I keep f***ing up at work. I'm hiding away in one of the conference rooms while I do my work. The stupid lady who sits in the cubicle next to me me drives me f***ing nuts. All she does is meet up with the cleaning lady and give her a kiss... then they giggle about it and gush about each other. She's done this 5 f***ing times today and it's only 2pm. Omg. F*** off! Go to the bathroom and have your sex already! |
![]() Anonymous45023, Anonymous59125, OctobersBlackRose, pirilin
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#35
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Quote:
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]Roses are red. Violets are blue.[ Look for the positive in the negative. PIRILON. If lemons fall from the sky, make lemonade. Unknown. Nothing stronger than habit. Victor Hugo. You are the slave of what you say, and the master of what you keep. Unknown. |
#36
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Quote:
![]() Quote:
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>< |
#37
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Feeling a bit blah today. Today I went to all my email accounts and contacted people I had started a communication with on a PenPal site. I am kind of disappointed no one has gotten back to me as yet. I guess I can't expect them to respond because I have been missing for so many months. But I am so BORED!
This boredom is killer. I want to read, but I pick up the book and just put it down. I am drinking too, yeah I know I shouldn't be but at this point I don't really give a crap.
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Tales of Love, Motivation, and An Interesting Journey - Please Subscribe to my Website on WordPress: Inspired Odyssey's Journey of Grace, Grit and Starting Again |
![]() Anonymous45023, Daonnachd, gina_re, OctobersBlackRose
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#38
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blue - are they still doing that weird grape thing? lol
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The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token "What if I can't get up and stand tall, What if the diamond days are all gone, and Who will I be when the Empire falls? Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token |
![]() pirilin
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![]() Takeshi
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#39
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@vertigo: They are ALWAYS flirting, and it's annoying as f***. It's a professional work environment! I don't understand why they need to be obnoxious like that. @raspberrytorte: I'm not sure, but I walked away because they were driving me f***ing nuts. |
![]() pirilin
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#40
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Feeling calm today after taking my 100mg Lamictal and Cymbalta. Feeling awful about my major melt down yesterday.
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![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#41
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I think I have myself calmed down and back to thinking rationally after a meltdown yesterday. Hope to get back to routine tomorrow
Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G930A using Tapatalk
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Current Meds Lamictal 200 mg x2 Seroquel 100 mg |
![]() Anonymous45023, Anonymous59125, gina_re, OctobersBlackRose, Takeshi
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#42
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Still sick and started itching again. Not as bad as last time and I don't have hives, but itching is not good. I'm scared it will get bad again. I'm sick of being sick but overall my mood is decent. I feel and think I'm stable. Just need the sickness to go away so I can enjoy it.
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![]() Anonymous45023, Gabyunbound, gina_re, OctobersBlackRose, pirilin, Takeshi, Wander
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#43
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Now that I'm taking more Seroquel, I sleep way too much and am tired anyway. Very hard to get up for work. Consuming a lot more caffeine. It's actually helping slightly with anxiety as well. My pdoc says it's an 'obnoxious' medication, but can be very effective. For my part, I'm torn between thinking it's the root of all evil, and something that can be truly helpful with my moods on both sides of the spectrum (and anxiety a bit).
My (new) pdoc said the meds I'm taking are really "20th century" -not sure what he meant but I'll be talking to him about it next appt. |
![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#44
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Quote:
Quetiapine is fine. But you may try something else. But new isn't always/often better. Mostly just different. Aripiprazole is something that's a bit more activating/antidepressive and less sedative/antihistaminergic.
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Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide. See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me. |
#45
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Killing pathogens with red wine.
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Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide. See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me. |
![]() Takeshi
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![]() Takeshi
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#46
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Bill for my gum surgery came in. I thought we paid in full, but insurance screwed us over so now we have to pay extra. This thing was expensive enough without having more to pay.
We're trying to pay bills off and now this. Grrrr. Other than that, working on photos to put on my Flickr site. |
![]() Anonymous45023, gina_re, OctobersBlackRose
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#47
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I have so much to do, I'm moving to another state at the end of August and haven't started packing, haven't looked into getting a moving company haven't looked or ordered boxes on line. but I'm so tired and my back is killing me, I just want to sleep, but I can't. I keep telling myself tomorrow...but the whole thing scares me so I do nothing. The idea of picking the wrong moving company that will hold my stuff hostage until I pay some inflated price I can't afford to because they have some hidden clause in their contract frightens me so much. There's no one here to help me with this. I'm paralyzed into inaction.
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Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
![]() Anonymous45023, Anonymous48850, gina_re, Icare dixit, OctobersBlackRose, Takeshi
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#48
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Quote:
![]() Why would they ask for extra money? There are not many possible contingencies, now are there? It's not a good business model for a moving company. Stay could start a storage company instead. ![]()
__________________
Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide. See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me. |
![]() Nammu
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![]() Nammu
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#49
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Quote:
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Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
![]() Anonymous45023, OctobersBlackRose, Takeshi
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#50
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Quote:
But that also distorts your view. And for us that could mean considerable distortion. It's not always like that. It's generally bigger companies that just don't care because they don't have to (and they can afford legal expenses), in my experience. Maybe your experiences are different. If it's really (still) a problem that many cheaper ones are shady, you should be able to find information about that on the Internet, right? Or ask at a reputable, expensive company why one should choose them and not a cheaper company. If they don't say it's because the cheaper ones might in the end cost you more or as much, it might not be an actual problem. If you're honest about how you can't pay for their services, they might advice you about alternatives. Maybe just out of kindness or because they want to create goodwill, as you might find yourself in a better financial position in the future. You can always try.
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Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide. See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me. |
![]() Nammu
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![]() Nammu
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