[LadyShadow]

Hey everyone!

So its 4th of July weekend, and I am officially on my own. My best friend is away for the weekend, and my family is off doing other things. I was okay with it at first, even had a positive experience to write about in my blog, but suddenly this wave of loneliness hit me.

So I have to ask how often do you feel alone? Do you have people you can reach out to but rather just be by yourself? What do you do when you feel alone? I am just wondering because at first I was okay with it, and now I feel like crying. Why bipolar why? Why do you make me a mess!!?? UGH.

[pirilin]

I'm sorry you are feeling that way.

I've never felt alone. Me, God and the devil, are a team. Team piri.

[JustJace2u]

I pretty much feel alone all the time. Most of my friends are either married with kids/families or they just live too far away. It sucks monkey balls. I miss being around family. Having my brother move here has helped slightly, but we are 2 completely different people so it is hard in that regard, plus he works late and I work a typical 9-5 M-F job. He works for a well known restaurant and they are only open for dinner. He leaves at about noon and isn't home usually until 2-3am. He moved here to Chicago from Portland just for this job.

I am often alone. I guess it's because I only have 1 friend and I've gotten used to being by myself. I've spent the past 6 years like this.

I've found the best thing to do is relax and find something you really enjoy doing -- or binge watch on TV/Netflix.

It's awesome to start personal projects too. Is there something you've always wanted to do but never had the time for? Take advantage of the time you're given and go out and do it!

[LadyShadow]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

I am often alone. I guess it's because I only have 1 friend and I've gotten used to being by myself. I've spent the past 6 years like this.

I've found the best thing to do is relax and find something you really enjoy doing -- or binge watch on TV/Netflix.

It's awesome to start personal projects too. Is there something you've always wanted to do but never had the time for? Take advantage of the time you're given and go out and do it!

You know yesterday I was excited because I went out and treated myself to a movie and lunch, but today everywhere is going to be crowded. Its kind of hard to find relaxing places in New York! I guess that's the drawbacks of living here. I don't know why, but I am feeling a bit depressed, don't really feel like doing anything. Its odd, because I am not usually like this. I think I need to give myself a swift kick in the butt!

[OctobersBlackRose]

All the time, even though Im not alone, I feel like I am...

[LadyShadow]

Originally Posted by OctobersBlackRose

All the time, even though Im not alone, I feel like I am...

I know I am not really alone either. My parents and sister are home. I guess it could be much worse if no one was here. But hugs to you, I know the feeling all too well.

[OctobersBlackRose]

Originally Posted by LadyShadow

I know I am not really alone either. My parents and sister are home. I guess it could be much worse if no one was here. But hugs to you, I know the feeling all too well.

Same here, it'd be much worse if there really was no one. And hugs back to you.

[wildflowerchild25]

Since my husband died, I have nights where I feel absolutely swallowed by loneliness. I've always been somewhat of a loner, but at least I had him by my side. Now, nobody. And I do have family and friends. But at night...well it's just me. After my son is asleep of course. I actually got two kittens six weeks ago to help assuage the loneliness. I keep them in my room at night and they sleep next to me. I feel a lot better with them around.

[confusedbyself]

Approximately 23 1/2 hours a day. The other 30 minutes I spend trying to hear my t say that I am not alone during sessions, but it doesn't seem to be able to come home with me.

[xRavenx]

Originally Posted by LadyShadow

Hey everyone!

So its 4th of July weekend, and I am officially on my own. My best friend is away for the weekend, and my family is off doing other things. I was okay with it at first, even had a positive experience to write about in my blog, but suddenly this wave of loneliness hit me.

So I have to ask how often do you feel alone? Do you have people you can reach out to but rather just be by yourself? What do you do when you feel alone? I am just wondering because at first I was okay with it, and now I feel like crying. Why bipolar why? Why do you make me a mess!!?? UGH.

I feel alone a lot. There are times I'm around many people, but I still feel very alone. In fact, it feels that way most the time. Sometimes I want to be physically alone, but other times, I want to be with people, especially the person I'm dating....bless him, but he isn't in a place in his life where he can be as reliable (he is in a legal fight with child's mother and as much as he wants to be emotionally available, I sense he is unable to give me that). A lot of my friends have moved on and are married....many are happily married. I try not to depend on anybody too much when I'm alone so that my expectations are not too high of others. Nevertheless, I struggle with disappointment and plans changing. It makes me not want to make plans to begin with since it can be exhausting.

I try to find movies to watch, places to go on my own if I'm certain I won't have plans, and find enjoyment without constantly having to surround myself around others since dependency is a trap for me. I do think it's normal to want to be alone at times....especially for those of us with Bipolar during different phases of our condition where we need to regroup and take care of ourselves before being available to others as much.

[Gabyunbound]

I spend a lot of time alone, but then I do love living on my own, having my own space and time to myself. Sometimes I get lonely, but not too much. I'm an introvert so I suppose it's normal for me. I have a couple of good friends near where I live and I'm close to a couple of family members, especially my brother.

My biggest regret right now is no longer being able to focus on reading, I used to a ton and never felt alone surrounded by books. I also used to write a lot and have been having the same problem with focus. Used to write a whole lot when hypo too but it's been years since I've had that experience.

What does make me feel alone sometimes, is that the vast majority of the people I know have spouses and kids and I divorced long ago and never had kids (never wanted them, but it makes me feel different -in a too different kind of way- not to have them). I do love my nephews though, though I wish they didn't live so far away.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by LadyShadow

Hey everyone!

So its 4th of July weekend, and I am officially on my own. My best friend is away for the weekend, and my family is off doing other things. I was okay with it at first, even had a positive experience to write about in my blog, but suddenly this wave of loneliness hit me.

So I have to ask how often do you feel alone? Do you have people you can reach out to but rather just be by yourself? What do you do when you feel alone? I am just wondering because at first I was okay with it, and now I feel like crying. Why bipolar why? Why do you make me a mess!!?? UGH.

Great topic!

I feel loneliness is simply a part of the "human condition."
Although some of us are more or less social/introverted than others, I feel, generally speaking, we are more "pack animals" than not.

We all certainly need one another on different levels.

I grew up in a very crowded house. We often had 2-4 siblings in a bedroom. For many years, we had one bathroom. A total of 7-10 or us in a small ranch house. There was no "alone" time anywhere in the house or yard. However, I felt very lonely because I did not feel I shared interests with others in the household.

Finding one very compatible friend can feel like we've struck gold or won the lotto, just because we can share commonalities, we feel "connected."
While we can feel very alone in a ballroom full of 300 ppl.

I often crave space/time alone.

At the same time, I enjoy people very much.

I miss a friend terribly. We were so close. We are currently on opposite coasts of the U.S. We still try to stay in touch. It is easier to do so with the technology available. I have other friends, compatible friends; we just are not as close as my friend and I have been. There are no pretenses, or attempts to pretend we are someone we are not with one another. Our friendship is both brutally honest and truly beautiful, all at once. Our friendship runs very deep. Our connection and love for one another is probably as close as it gets to "unconditional" Love.

My husband and I are very close, best friends. We share everything together. No pretenses. I am thankful for this. There was a time when we were not so close, when we were both feeling threatened by becoming so close, I think?
We overcame that and just "let it all hang out," the good, the questionable, etc. We also have a very "unconditional Love" type of a foundation now.

I think, for me, it's about feeling truly "connected" with one or a few, as opposed to feeling like I have lots of friends. I can feel very lonely in a large group, for sure. Yet, I can enjoy companionship, esp when we feel a deeper sense of connection, which often takes time and an investment in the relationship, for sure.

I had written about this topic on a different forum last year. Lots of varied responses had followed. One of the forum moderators had responded, saying she never feels lonely, ever. Hmmm... interesting response from someone who spends a lot of her time and energy reaching out to strangers? In all honesty, we are all reaching out on some level simply by participating in forums. Aren't we? We are wanting to participate/interact with other people, aren't we?

Thanks for the topic. It's an important one. I am sure I will continue to think about this and may have some further insights into myself and my sense of loneliness.


WC

I have less people in my life than I used to. Most of my family I deceased and I feel a bit sad that those big July 4th family celebrations of us all at the beach are gone. Things like that. But, that's life for me and I accept it.

I am an introvert by nature so being alone doesn't necessary mean lonely for me. I am troubled that my concentration on books has waned recently. I love to read and I don't know what happened. I hope my focus returns soon. It's my go-to hobby and it especially helps when I am feeling troubled.

[Ceridwen18]

I'm rarely alone, unless I shut my office door at work, or in the car travelling to work, and I crave it. I love being by myself. Loneliness is different, though, isn't it? I often feel lonely, and I think for me it's because I feel no one has my back. At the end of the day, I can only rely on myself, and that makes me feel lonely. My mother lives nearby, but her support is limited as she prefers to keep things on a superficial level (e.g. what are you having for dinner, darling?). My closest friend lives a long way away, and as we are both busy mums of teenage sons, we don't talk as often as we'd like. My partner works away for 2 weeks, then home for one, and tired, and is not empathic and doesn't understand how I think.
I'm lucky as I have a few friends close by, but we all do have our own lives. As I get older, I realise how alone we are in this world, and what a lonely place it can be, even if you are surrounded by people.

i feel alone all the time.

even if i'm with someone who claims that they understand and know what i'm going through, clearly they don't.. clearly they don't care if i vanished from the earth tomorrow
usually for me it goes something like this:

me: these are my struggles, i am finding it so hard to cope and so hard to see the good parts to life

other person: yes, i can understand that- me too!

later:

person to someone else: what ever you do, don't talk to that person.. they are weird!

and then i'm left with dealing with the conciquences of people taking it less serious than it actually is

[GoldenSnitch]

I'm sorry that you're struggling with this.

I feel alone a lot. My disorder has alienated a lot of people and ruined many relationships. When I have my daughter I don't feel so alone because I'm busy doing things with her but the rest of the time I feel quite lonely.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Woolly Bugger]

I never really feel alone exactly. I'm a high school teacher, like many others on this forum, and I don't have a single real friend at work. There's not one person I can go to when I'm lonely, need advice, comforting, to share a joke, eat lunch with, etc. And I've been there five years. It baffles me; it really does. I'm not a bad guy. I have lots to offer. Sometimes I think it's the age difference: most of the other teachers are at ten to twenty years younger than me. While I don't see this as a barrier, others may very well do so. I just don't know. I usually eat my lunch alone and watch Youtube videos about fishing and sailing. I used to play chess to keep myself occupied, but I gave that up. At least, when I come home, I have my old friends, my wife, and my tropical fish to keep me company.

[scatterbrained04]

I feel alone probably 80% of the time. Like many others, I can feel extremely alone in a crowded room.

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[JustJace2u]

Originally Posted by confusedbyself

Approximately 23 1/2 hours a day. The other 30 minutes I spend trying to hear my t say that I am not alone during sessions, but it doesn't seem to be able to come home with me.

Same thing here with my t. I know she means well, but it doesn't help my loneliness.