I feel suicidal

Has anyone heard from her?
bizi

No activity since the 3rd, just before she had to go to work.

I'm extremely worried.

I advised her to go to work and not the hospital. I hope she chose to go to the hospital.

I really hope she is okay. I feel so terrible for her. I remember how horrible and difficult it was to go to work during an episode. It was almost just as bad to call in sick and hear the tone of disappointment and even anger in my co-workers voice. It used to kill me inside. I really hope she is okay, or in the hospital getting help. We are all thinking of you Rasp.

Hope things are ok!

Hi sweetie, how are you?

Please update us ASAP. She may be in IP. When I was in IP, we had no cell phones, no contact with others except a landline phone and visitation hours.

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I'm sorry you're hurting . I'm in the same position between rage, dysphoria, and crippling depression. ((Trigger))... I actually self harmed for the first time in years about a week ago. I'm ashamed and pissed at myself. I can't even stomach food lately. I've been surviving on chocolate milk because I need to take my morning AP with food. Hang in there Hun. I almost put myself in IP a week ago too. Kinda still wish I had!

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Nothing, so far.

The not knowing is horrible. The guilt, justified or unjustified, is horrible, frankly. We assume a responsibility, just by giving support, don't we? (maybe best not discuss that here, or at all(?); let's just hope for the best; I just needed/wanted to express some of my own worries and I hope it doesn't sound self-important)

I so (and let's) hope she's in hospital or there is some other reason she doesn't want to be on or can't access PC.

Oh whoops... I totally missed this thread

I think she's okay and in IP. I was talking to her in PM right before she left. Like literally a few minutes before she left. We were lol'ing

normally she sends me a PM when she has s break at work... like almost always. No PM this time. But, I'm pretty sure she went to work anyways. She was upset with work in this thread, but didn't want to screw over her coworkers. She said she wasn't feeling well. So, I think she probably left early and went to IP. She PM'ed me right before she was supposed to go to work

Edit -- phone typos

I know that words are words and it might not change anything. You have people that love you. I see from previous comments that your husbands knows about how you are feeling which I think is great that you are able to communicate openly with him. If you do not want to be on an anti-psychotic then I wouldn't. I am not sure if you are on any other medications in general. If you are I would recommend changing your medication to something different. I know that finding a medication that is right for you is hard. I would definitely suggest therapy with your medications like someone talked about earlier. I know that therapy has helped me a bit. I don't want to say anything to upset you but I am sure that you know there is a suicidal hotline the phone number is 1-800-273-8255 if you ever need to talk. I really hope that things improve for you. I know you do not know me personally but if you ever need to talk I am more then willing to listen.

She hasn't communicated with me either. I asked for a simple no.

Love and hugs across the miles

I hope they are helping her.
((((((HUGS)))))))
bizi

Hope she got to treatment.

Thinking of you!

I understand & can relate. I hope you're feeling better very soon.

We're all thinking of you and routing for you.

She is too selfless. Too high standards. Pushing herself relentlessly.

I would expect at least 2 weeks for IP. 1 week would be kinda short, all things considered.. and she's been gone for 1 week

Yes, she could very well (still) be in hospital. I just wish she would've told us during her break she'd go there.

Thinking of you and sending more hugs!!

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Thinking of you....

Yeah, I know what you mean.

It's possible she had a breakdown at work and was rushed to the hospital, in which case idk if she could respond to us

still thinking of you Raspberry. I hope you are getting the help you need and come back to us soon. (((Hugs)))

There is a myriad of possible reasons. From another psychotic episode to having forgotten her password.

But frankly, she's too stubborn about antipsychotics. Many of us use an antipsychotic, even/like those of us with BP-II.

But when you are diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder BP type, anxiety just changes your perception too much. Just assume you have it, it's true, because you wouldn't be able to tell whether it is, if it is.

That's at least my experience with it.