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#1
Aug 02, 2007, 01:16 PM
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 i've not in the best place these last few days.i never associate relaspe with being hypomanic, but each time it is. i find myself hurting inside so much that i looked in the wrong place for relief. the anniversary of my son's death came and went, and i thought i did well, but here i am. i'm tired of seeing myself as a "faiture" everytime i get to this point. it only makes the feeling of shame worst. I just went back to therapy working on some childhood abuse issues, she saids that i'm at this place of "discovery" where you start to face the abuse. I found a very good psych, i went to see him last week. he's the first doc that said that i had generalized anxiety disorder. he rx busbar. all these years of feeling anxious, it's amazing what we learn to live with, the strenght that it sometimes takes. He said that i can take my geodon as needed. i took one last night, i feel a little more settled. i'm hoping to ge stable enought to get back on track. to the place where my meds are enought.
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....never give up...love never dies... |
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#2
Aug 02, 2007, 04:10 PM
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I know what u mean....I am currently working on starting to deal with my feelings...something that I have learned over the years to put aside. My T says that I have to confront the things in my childhood before I can move on in my adulthood...not that anyone should live in the past...just that things should be resolved.
 I am not sure that I want to go there...but we all have things that we have to do....I think we all look in the wrong places trying to find something to fill the void...even though we don't know what the void consists of....sorry bout the death of your son...don't know how long ago it happened but i am sure it makes all of the bp harder to handle. We are all here for you and will be here anytime you need us...  Remember there is some blue skies somewhere in all this black craziness we live in.
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Married, mother of 3 boys, Hoping to find blue skies amist all the black |
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#3
Aug 02, 2007, 05:11 PM
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...thanks mydarlin,
reaching out is making me less isolated, you make me know that i'm not so all alone. the fact that you find it in you to mother your boys. i think that you deserve a hug for that. dorsey
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....never give up...love never dies... |
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#4
Aug 02, 2007, 05:38 PM
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if you need me...just pm me or post something....i check this site daily and will be here for you....cause i know i won't be in such a good place for very long
I'm glad that I can help someone... most days I feel like scum on the bottoms of people's shoes.  Hang in there
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Married, mother of 3 boys, Hoping to find blue skies amist all the black |
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