[WildcatVet]

Yeah...I'm very tired and whiney today. I think I'm older than many of you here so you may not get this but I spent most of the night thinking about how my life is flashing past me and I'm going nowhere. Days turn into weeks..into months... How I'll probably never have the opportunity to do things I want to do. Go back to my profession. Visit and re-visit places I've been to or want to go to. Just a vast expanse of nothingness before the nothingness...
Okay, well I'm done with that for now. Time to clean up and get dressed. That's my big plan for the day!

[WildcatVet]

Oh, happy first day of fall for you northern hemispherers ~ time for SAD to kick in!

[bizi]

did one load of laundry last night and showered! yeah!
bizi

Originally Posted by WildcatVet

Oh, happy first day of fall for you northern hemispherers ~ time for SAD to kick in!

next week we are meant to get weather hotter than Barcelona

for the first week of autumn, that's pretty weird...

I do get about life flashing past you

2017's almost gone and I've done nothing with my life. nothing at all.

I always say yeah.. i'll do this, that and the other, 1/ 2 months later all this time has passed and I've done **** all

[WildcatVet]

We all have to be careful of what we put in our bodies even the everyday stuff like coffee, tea, sugar, and other foods. Not to mention the herbal and natural remedies we add-on on our own thinking they will somehow help, but have the same or worse side effects and interactions as our prescription meds.

[Daonnachd]

Today I go in for ECT.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by vertigo

Today I go in for ECT.

Thinking of you.


WC

[hopeless2015]

So I had my first night home from hospital. My seroquel knocked me out and I slept on couch all night. I'll have to make sure I get in the bed after I take my night meds. I've been up for two hours and haven't done anything but sit on couch and smoke cigarettes. I should probably do something. My husband has the day off but is out running errands and I'm feeling kind of lonely. I've been such a downer lately, I apologize for that

[99fairies]

My mood is low today. I can't get ahold of my pdoc and I need my meds! Took my last dose yesterday. Already starting to feel the pain.

[xRavenx]

People are asking me why my eyes are red. I'm not on anything besides my regular meds. Im not looking or sounding healthy today. My sleep is bad. The racing thoughts and that negative voice in my head won't stop. I have an hour home and I feel like I can't even drive, my anxiety and frustration are that much of a problem, but no choice but to deal with it. I just want to go home.

[Tucson]

I have a full bladder. Evidently the catheter is not working. Another trip to the ER. Otherwise I am doing OK. I am looking into debt forgiveness. I am paying $600 a month on debt. I am on disability.

so I did the first part of my anxiety course

not what i'd hoped (I mean I took somethings away from it, but not much)

then she cut me off after half an hour, and i'd payed for an hour

felt quite angry at that

[liveforsummer]

Hi everyone hope everyone is coping ok. I'm feeling much better but can't shake the paranoia so just saying hi and hugs

[Faltering]

Life has been relatively normal interspersed with strange occurrences. They're so quick that they're almost not there. For example, smelling a full course meal when no food is around, hearing a cat purring loudly in the absence of animals, and seeing someone come at me with a knife without warning. Sometimes I hear the maniacal watch laughter play in my head. Sometimes I envision myself running off the road while driving. Not for any particular reason, just for fun.

Regardless, I think I'm okay.

[Wander]

Started back at work last night and it was overwhelming but I got through ok. My mood is stable but I have a lot of anxiety. I think coming out of hospital and hitting the ground running was a mistake but I have made it. Back to work again tomorrow. I expect it will be just as busy as it was last night. Sigh ...

[fishin fool]

I am happy and sad at the same time, can't really explain it.

[Tucson]

When I was young, I was a confused, lost soul. I talked with an important oerson to me. She started treating me like as though I am the same person I was in the past. Still my MI probably has made me look incapable. This can be true. I felt both surprised and angry with her. Maybe this is actualy the stigma associated with BP or any other MI? All I want is some respect.

[Lifeischallenging]

So I just found out that my mother wants to put everything in storage with our own renters insurance. I am tired of this. I am tired of supporting them. I want them to stop thinking I am going to be here to support them and start supporting themselves.

[bpforever1]

I had a phone interview for the other company but was unhappy again. They expect me to work from 7 am to 9pm at times and also travel all over the city at times taking 2 hours for one-way trip to work. I thought about it and said forget it.

Now, I have another interview tomorrow with a tour guide school. I am happy. The hours are short and it is not too far to go there. I am hoping to get it and will know for sure soon.

I want to work full-time but the companies that offer me interviews have ridiculous expectations. I don't know who goes for such companies. The tour guide school stint is part-time and for a short period until the year ends. I am hoping my other company jobs resume again because one of my jobs is on break now. I like my jobs and am happy with what I have. I hope this next interview works out for the best.

I am feeling quite low.
not to the point where i'm struggling and begging for help,
still quite low though

it is 1 35 in the afternoon

my head is full of depressive thoughts, and I am binging on candy

how productive

despite my stomach hurting I am still doing it

binging I mean

[scatterbrained04]

Thinking a lot this morning about my take on meds and treatments and what I wish people would do when I'm unwell. I don't know why. I feel very able to communicate that right now, but I can't when I'm unwell. What I want then is different and not healthy. If only people cared enough to listen and to help...

Sitting here looking at my disaster of a house. Will probably try to tackle a couple chores here in a minute. Going to my mom's to help her pack today in of couple hours.

[bizi]

Originally Posted by scatterbrained04

Thinking a lot this morning about my take on meds and treatments and what I wish people would do when I'm unwell. I don't know why. I feel very able to communicate that right now, but I can't when I'm unwell. What I want then is different and not healthy. If only people cared enough to listen and to help...

Sitting here looking at my disaster of a house. Will probably try to tackle a couple chores here in a minute. Going to my mom's to help her pack today in of couple hours.

Perhaps you could write a living will for health care. I forget what it is called already. There is a thread for that not too long ago.
bizi

Originally Posted by scatterbrained04

Thinking a lot this morning about my take on meds and treatments and what I wish people would do when I'm unwell. I don't know why. I feel very able to communicate that right now, but I can't when I'm unwell. What I want then is different and not healthy. If only people cared enough to listen and to help...

Sitting here looking at my disaster of a house. Will probably try to tackle a couple chores here in a minute. Going to my mom's to help her pack today in of couple hours.

chores?

what are they again...

I should probably take the hints- tripping over empty bottles and stray wires, and not being able to find much as a sign to do something

but blah