Can reoccurent sever episodes cause PTSD? - TRIGGER WARNING

Hi everyone, I hope you are all managing ok today. In the past I have had full blown PTSD but recovered after a lot of therapy. Now after three 2 month episodes in less than a year I feel traumatised. I am having flashbacks of my times when very suicidal and memories of my episodes flowing through my mind all day. This leaves me anxious and exhausted. My fight/flight response is kicking in, as is my 'need' to escape through marijuana and alcohol.

I am not depressed anymore, thankfully, but the flashbacks get me down. I am terrified I will die by suicide as my resilience is low and I don't think I can take another severe episode. Some have been manic, some depressed, and some mixed. I have spent about five months IP. I am over it and just want to be stable for many months, even a year if I can manage it.

Now the PTSD-like symptoms have returned I am overwhelmed. I don't know what to do. The last few days I failed miserably in self-care but I am panning to turn that around. I even went for a long walk along the beach today, played guitar and worked. I am functioning ok but find the world a scary place, especially the world inside my mind. I fear another episode. Currently my five meds seem to be helping in there own ways so I don't need a med tweek. This is psychological. Next Tuesday I am seeing my T and we will talk at length about this.

I am just wondering if anyone else has experienced PTSD or been traumatised by severe episodes.

Hi there.I'm sorry you're struggling so much.

I don't really know anything about Bipolar but I do know that if you were diagnosed with PTSD in the past,it never goes away,there's no cure for it but one can learn to manage symptoms.And symptoms can flare up when triggered by something.It sounds like your episodes have triggered your PTSD to flare back up?

I wish I had words of wisdom for you but I don't.Sometimes I just have to ride out my PTSD symptoms knowing they will eventually subside.

About 5 years ago I went into a full blown manic state for 6 months. I left my family, partied a lot and had some very bad things happen to me. I turned into a totally different person and made some huge mistakes that I deeply regret. I have PTSD from those 6 months...flash backs ect. The only thing that helps is to keep reminding myself that It wasn't me doing those horrible things, It was the mania.

Wander, I am so sorry you are having to deal with additional PTSD. Just is not fair. You deserve a break.

That said, I think it's entirely possible to experience PTSD from episodes of severe illness. PTSD is readily accepted as a result of severe medical illness, so why not also accepted from severe episodes of MI?

(((((( wander ))))))

You truly deserve a break.


WC

Yes, I believe that episodes of mental illness are traumatic events and can cause PTSD.

Yes is happens more than people think... I hate that you are going through all this.

I hope your Therapy work can give you some much needed rest mentally.

oh definitely

I had PTSD symptoms for a while after my worst complete psychotic break. I have come a long way but certain things will trigger it again and it IS traumatizing.

Other stuff...like some embarrassing and sexually related crazy stuff when manic definitely causes me trauma to think about. so I try not to think about it lol. not sure if that's the way to go

I hope you feel better soon wander. The further you are away from the episode the easier it gets me thinks

Thanks so much everyone! I have read up peer reviewed articles and it seems PTSD from Bipolar does happen. With my PTSD past (severe childhood and adult trauma) I am worried it will open the can of worms I have safely tucked away. I brushed it over with my T last week and he suggested we make it the focus of our next session (Tuesday).

For now I am still self-medicating (pot and alcohol) and I know I should ease up but it seems to help for now. They help me 'check-out' from the symptoms. Still functioning ok but need a lot of sleep to do that. Exercise has been lacking; well, unless you count running around at work for 11 hours a week. After study and work I just want to relax as much as possible.