Was I wrong to do this? My therapist said I was

So, I made a post in the check-in thread on Friday (I think?) about these kids who like to do bowling and rollerskating late at night in the middle of the apartment hallway. I can't tell their ages... but at least 7?

Because I was agitated, I took a pic of the kids (no faces, because I'm not going to do that) to show to the apartment staff that these kids are indeed rollerskating. I sent it as an email.

My therapist thinks I went overboard by taking a pic and sending it to the apartment staff. Do you think it was overboard?

These kids mess with my sleep, which then messes with my mood. I can't stand hearing loud rolling sounds at 9pm!! And I want people to believe me when I say they're disruptive!!

I don't think it was overboard, blue

No, it was reporting behavior that needs to stop.

Was there a date/time stamp on the photo as well?

No, it was just a cell phone pic, so there is no time stamp.

Is there a cut off time for noise.?

I lived in an apartment once that it was 10 pm. It sucked I hated it but I did complain about stuff after 10 and it stopped.

Not sure why your Pdoc said that ????

Sorry your dealing with this.

If there was no better way to handle it, I do not think you went overboard.

I don't think it was overboard if you didn't photograph their faces.

I really don't understand parents who let their kids stay up so late. I guess because so many parents both (husband/wife) work so late nowadays they let their kids stay up late because otherwise they'd never see them. But if that is the case, why aren't the parents spending the time with them rather then letting them run (or skate) wild with their friends in the hallway? I don't have kids, and never will, but when I was 7 years old I went to sleep no later than 9 pm. Younger than that I went to sleep at 8 pm. That also gave my parents some time together alone. But I guess if the kids are outside the apartments rollerskating alone, maybe the parents are alone together. That's one way to get rid of the kids for a while. I'm sure that's done nowadays.

Good luck! I hope the apartment management actually do something about what you describe. I can't imagine they'd like rollerskating going on in the hallways, anyway. I'd assume it could damage or scuff the flooring.

I saw the picture and you were quite discreet in taking it.

I think you've handled this well. I think photos help to make situations more real to whomever is in charge of finding a resolution.

I cannot imagine telling you that you'd mishandled your complaint?

I think it stinks that you have to address this at all. The parents are not honoring boundaries.


WC

I don’t agree with your therapist at all. I think you made a complaint in an appropriate manner with a picture to prove it.

I don’t think you went overboard. You only sent the photo to the appropriate people to make the behaviour stop. we can’t always control everything in our environment but it sounds like they needed to be stopped.

I don’t think it was overboard blue

What matters is what you think. Fk the terapist.

I think you were perfectly well within your rights to do what you did. Not overboard at all. Hope you get some action on this issue.

Does your therapist judge you similarly on other matters, or was this a one off?

I don't think you went overboard , you was just getting proof

you handled this better than i did years ago when i was young and stupid. As long as there are faces i think it's ok. to bad there isn't a time stamp that is visible.

I was wondering this too.. is this a therapist with a tendency to judge and/or make “mistakes”?

No, I don't think you went overboard, either. Kids will be kids, that's fine, but there's a time and a place for making loud noises and what you described was neither the time nor the place - to me.

Not in the least overboard. I can't even imagine why she'd say that(!) (Unless maybe she lets her kids be obnoxious like that too -- those are the only people I can imagine objecting as they don't like being busted....)

BF and I are the managers at our very small complex and we sometimes use pictures to quickly convey a situation to the landlord. Words are fine, but pictures can be very useful. It's too bad there's no time stamp for yours though as that is the main point of your (totally justified) complaint. Do they really not have that info?? Seems weird when so much in the digital world seems hyperinformationalized. How do you like that word?! Lol. It's made up.

What would the ideal steps to take be in this situation in your therapists eyes? Do nothing and not sleep?

You need to sleep, and they were rollerskating in the hall. You didn't scream at them, threaten them or their parents, take pictures of their face and put it in the news, or anything like that. You simply alerted the apartment staff. That was the right thing to do.

On my phone it has the date and time, just not stamped on the photo.

It would be helpful if people said they weren't there, you can prove that they were.

Sorry guys but I must speak up. Taking photos of someone else's children is never okay. What exactly did your therapist say about this?

However, your standing up for yourself is a good thing and addressing your concerns to the property manager is within your right. If it were me, I would document the frequency and if possible the suites from which these youngsters come.

At 9pm or anytime I would be infuriated as well. Unfortunately most official quiet times aren't observed until after 11:00 pm. Double check this - and find out your community ordinances too. If they are in violation you have within your rights calling the authorities.

Do you feel capable of talking to the parents? Perhaps a suitable plan might be made accommodating the both of you. Maybe there is a best time these kids can do their thing. I wish I had a better answer for you.

Cell phones store the data for the time that a photo was taken. There are apps that will take this data and place an actual time stamp on the photo itself. I think you have every right to stick up for yourself and that includes taking a photo like you did.

I would say that my therapists typically don’t judge me at all and in fact work to make me feel more normal so I would say your T overstepped their boundaries. However I suspect you T is a parent and defense of kids could be a gut instinct that overrode their training as a T. Regardless I don’t think judgement belongs in the therapy room. Also consider white noise, I go to bed around nine too and always need a fan or some wave music to drown out the small noises that come with having neighbors.