[BatsBelfry]

I have been thinking a lot about suicide lately. What it would be like. Whether I would have to ability to go through with it. How I would do it. I feel that if I discuss this with my therapist tonight it's going to end in me in a hospital. Why is this topic so out of bounds. Or is it? Maybe the fear of talking about it is in my head. Does anyone talk to their therapist about it? Hell, I'm afraid of bringing it up here. Maybe this topic is against the rules. I'm afraid of hospitalization or a meds increase. I very much don't want either.

I've discussed it. I've talked about my research on it, my plan, my feelings and such. You wont get sent to hospital unless you are actively suicidal/a threat to yourself or someone else.

[BatsBelfry]

Originally Posted by LostMyMuchness

You wont get sent to hospital unless you are actively suicidal/a threat to yourself or someone else.

That is the crazy part. It's such a judgement call. What if she takes the conversation wrong.

Clearly state that you are not actively suicidal and you have no plans to harm yourself.

[Blueberrybook]

I would first ask your therapist that in discussing things like thoughts of suicide, at what point would she feel she needs to report it and send you to the hospital? And maybe even ask her to give examples of statements regarding suicide that she would feel OK to discuss with no risk of hospitalization and some examples of sentences a person would say where she would definitively call in the authorities?

Obviously, you need to talk about it with all those thoughts. And you need a safe platform to discuss it. It seems the therapist should be that platform, but it's hard to know where a therapist feels obliged to report it.

Originally Posted by BatsBelfry

I have been thinking a lot about suicide lately. What it would be like. Whether I would have to ability to go through with it. How I would do it. I feel that if I discuss this with my therapist tonight it's going to end in me in a hospital. Why is this topic so out of bounds. Or is it? Maybe the fear of talking about it is in my head. Does anyone talk to their therapist about it? Hell, I'm afraid of bringing it up here. Maybe this topic is against the rules. I'm afraid of hospitalization or a meds increase. I very much don't want either.

I can honestly say what ever she decides to do (hospital, meds increase, etc), it would be in the interest of keeping you safe.

I know you don't want those things, but better to be safe than sorry.

Possible trigger:

she'd feel terrible if someone went in to her office saying I'm not suicidal, I don't have a plan, then agreeing not to do anything about it, and that person going home to take their life

I'm just giving you an example of why she might choose to do it

Originally Posted by LostMyMuchness

I've discussed it. I've talked about my research on it, my plan, my feelings and such. You wont get sent to hospital unless you are actively suicidal/a threat to yourself or someone else.

I have always been placed on suicide watch just in case

I'm not saying you're wrong, that's just how my team handles it

Originally Posted by raging vortex

I have always been placed on suicide watch just in case

I'm not saying you're wrong, that's just how my team handles it

Interesting. My therapists have always made me feel like I could discuss it without threat of action unless I was suicidal. I guess each place is different.

[yellow_fleurs]

I also have discussed feeling suicidal with my psychiatrist a few times, and he never sent me to the hospital. I do think it must differ by the provider and also their assessment of the situation for you as an individual.

[~Christina]

I’m able to talk to my T and Pdoc when I’m feeling suicidal not “ I’m going to go off myself “

But all the fleeting thoughts or more pronounced .. as long as I don’t have a plan WITH intent there is no freak out and recommend for IP

Like others mentioned above, I too have been able to talk about those thoughts w/o any fear of being hospitalized. They may have asked “Do you feel like you need to be hospitalized to remain safe?” But no one ever pushed it.

[Pookyl]

I have discussed my suicidal thoughts with my psychiatrist but not my therapist. I become actively suicidal quickly so I end up IP.
Next week for the first time I will be discussing them with my therapist. This is at the request of my psychiatrist, who would like me to manage intrusive thoughts better.

[*Laurie*]

What Christina posted ^^^.

Possible trigger:

In my experience, the difference is between saying, "I feel suicidal" and "I have a plan that when I go home I'm going to..." and so on.

By the way, I know you're new here - just a heads-up. A post with a topic like this one needs to have a trigger warning on it. That's the little red ball with the x-thingy on it.

[Blueberrybook]

How did it go?

[BatsBelfry]

Originally Posted by Blueberrybook

How did it go?

So when the topic came up at the start I was warned to be careful. I asked why and she said because depending on how this goes she would need to hospitalize me. So I never really talked much about it. She said if I have a concrete plan with a day and such that is her line I would have crossed. I think this is all BS. I needed to steer the conversation toward something else. I do have, well let's just call them "strong thoughts" about this topic. If I can't tell her I can't tell anyone.

[yellow_fleurs]

That response from her does not seem like a good way to get you to open up. I think it is important that you feel you are able to tell her what is really going on, even if it does mean you are unsafe and need the hospital. I also talked to my psychiatrist today about it, and he kept pressing me with questions to get more info.

Possible trigger:

Told him I was thinking about it multiple times/day but no specific plan and still felt in control mostly

. Guess I am still considered stable enough, fortunately. He just told me to call if I get worse before I see him next month.

[Fuzzybear]

I’ve discussed this... but not with a therapist. I haven’t had reason to trust them, in this location.

Hugs

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by BatsBelfry

I have been thinking a lot about suicide lately. What it would be like. Whether I would have to ability to go through with it. How I would do it. I feel that if I discuss this with my therapist tonight it's going to end in me in a hospital. Why is this topic so out of bounds. Or is it? Maybe the fear of talking about it is in my head. Does anyone talk to their therapist about it? Hell, I'm afraid of bringing it up here. Maybe this topic is against the rules. I'm afraid of hospitalization or a meds increase. I very much don't want either.

I too am afraid of hospitalization or a meds increase (or “forced” change )

I too very much do not want either.

I’ve even considered moving countries to somewhere I think might be more “bear friendly” - not an option


Thank you for raising this topic and for the sensitive post. It’s a “difficult topic” to raise with providers, for sure

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by raging vortex

I have always been placed on suicide watch just in case

I'm not saying you're wrong, that's just how my team handles it

This is another reason why I, personally, do not trust the system in this location.

(Being allergic to almost all meds doesn’t help, for me personally being on high doses of meds, hospitalization etc would likely have the opposite effect to keeping me safe)

[Scooter9]

I had bad experiences with my T when I had one. It's the reason I no longer have a T.

Unfortunately it's up to the T whether he or she will hospitalize you so you have to tread carefully.

Some are more understating but others are not.

I wonder why there is such a wide range in how they react? Is there a general standard protocol, or do they go by gut?

[luvyrself]

Originally Posted by LostMyMuchness

Clearly state that you are not actively suicidal and you have no plans to harm yourself.

—-yes, my understanding of this is that they make a distinction between passive thoughts (mulling it over) and seriously planning it. You are safer speaking about this to a professional who knows you well and knows that you have faced crises in a more constructive way ———than if you are talking about it to someone who hardly knows you. They have to cover themselves also.

I've found that psychiatrists are not troubled by my discussions of suicide. In the ER especially, they are unmoved. One told me that it was my choice to commit suicide. He said he hoped i didn't make that choice but it was up to me.


On the other hand, i've found my support group to be quite alarmist. When i said that several days before i had attempted suicide by pills they insisted i go to the ER. They called an ambulance and escorted me thru the building complex. It was silly because i'd been suicidal days before, not then. At the ER they turned me away again. And i got a $50 bill for the ambulance ride.

Anyways, i don't mind because hospitals here are wretched. I've heard it said that when you want to go into the hospital you don't really need it but when you don't want to go into the hospital, that's when you really need it.

[*Laurie*]

Geez. I agree with yellow_fleurs. Shutting you down so forcefully doesn't seem very supportive or wise. That said, your therapist might have her reasons for doing what she did. I hope she does, anyway.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by whatever2013

I've found that psychiatrists are not troubled by my discussions of suicide. In the ER especially, they are unmoved. One told me that it was my choice to commit suicide. He said he hoped i didn't make that choice but it was up to me.


On the other hand, i've found my support group to be quite alarmist. When i said that several days before i had attempted suicide by pills they insisted i go to the ER. They called an ambulance and escorted me thru the building complex. It was silly because i'd been suicidal days before, not then. At the ER they turned me away again. And i got a $50 bill for the ambulance ride.

Anyways, i don't mind because hospitals here are wretched. I've heard it said that when you want to go into the hospital you don't really need it but when you don't want to go into the hospital, that's when you really need it.

This.......