Bipolar Questions Version 4

I quit a job I worked in college one holiday season. It was at the mall and my boss was on a huge power trip. I was seasonal, but she asked me to stay on afterward. I agreed and told her my hours were limited, but she started scheduling me way beyond my limit. I left because I didn't want to rearrange my life for a job that had zero future for me. I hated it becsuse I had to be fake and try to sell products people didn't need and I didn't believe in.

Have you ever been fired? If so, why?

Yes my last job on "ill health grounds" which is utter bull as I was well and working hard after my promotion

Question: Have you got low self esteem if so what are you doing to help yourself?

I wouldn't say I have low self-esteem (I believe that I'm a good person and all that) but I sometimes have really low self confidence in my abilities. Especially my social skills. I think confidence comes in time and I try to recognize the little victories.

How do you try to stay healthy physically? Especially when you're depressed.

I try to work out 4-5 days a week especially when depressed and I eat well (including a healthy breakfast smoothie) and take vitamins and supplements. I’m not always successful but I strive towards that.

Does bipolar disorder impact your social life either positively or negatively?

Negatively, for sure. My episodes have always lost me friends from time to time, and prevented potential new ones. However, when I became especially ill, I lost almost everyone. I mostly just hang out with my hubby. I do see and entertain his friends from time to time, and we've been friendly with our neighbor, who happens to be moving away soon. I had some friends from DBSA a while back, but eventually we all faded away from it, and each other.

Q: Which have been your worst episodes? Depression, Mixed episodes, or mania?

I hate them all equally. Friends and family enjoy my hypomania and hate my depression, and mixed episodes, but inside I find all 3 as awful as each other.

Is there an area of your home that really needs to be sorted out, but the thought of tackling it just makes you want to hide under the duvet?

My building recently had to do a pest control treatment and absolutely everything had to be removed from the kitchen, bathrooms and closets. All furniture moved away from the walls and everything had to be cleaned. It was a huge nightmare and caused me many panic attacks. Just trying to deal with the clutter and find somewhere to put everything while having no energy. But on the plus side my apartment is very clean and tidy... at least for now.

Have you ever tried group therapy? What do you think about it?

Yes. Briefly, when I first started seeing a psychiatrist almost 17 years ago. There is also group therapy inpatient and in PHPs/IOPs (Partial Hospitalization programs and Intensive Outpatient programs). I attended many of those. Otherwise, I've had private therapy. Group therapy wasn't my cup of tea. I feel I get more for my money in private -- more focused on my needs. Group therapy isn't completely like online forums. On online forums, you have more choices and can be around others with more similar issues. Maybe not in group therapy.

Q: Do you care whether your psychiatrist or therapist is male or female? Preferences?

I don't have a preference. I have seen two males that were great, one female that was great and one female that I didn't really care for as much as the others. I prefer a female therapist though.

Do you take any natural supplements for mental health?

L-Tryptophan. One of the 13 aminoacids contained in protein.
It calms me down and helps me sleep. Turkeys have a lot of it.

What's your favorite season?.

No. Honestly I have thought about it but am worried that they could interact with my prescriptions.

What kinds of self care do you find helpful?

Different things at different times. Being extremely compliant with meds and therapy is probably most important for me.

Are you/have you ever been a sleepwalker?

I've never sleep walked but my brother would sometimes. One time he came into my room and started looking through my things saying he was looking for coupons. In all fairness if anyone would have had them it would be me lol

How many hours of sleep do you need to feel good?

At least 7 to 9 hours of sleep usually helps me feel good. Any less is not as ideal. Too much sleep usually makes me feel unwell.

Q: What do you listen to, watch, or read most days to help you feel good?

Modest Mouse- my favorite band

do you typically remember your dreams when you wake up?

I have periods when my dreams are very vivid and I remember them in a lot of detail but other times I'll go weeks without remembering them at all.

What types of therapy have you tried (ex CBT) ?

I know I've tried CBT and DBT as well as psychodynamic therapy. CBT was helpful, but the psychodynamic therapy made a huge impact on me.

Can you remember how many meds you've tried?

No, I lost track years ago. I’ve been through many, many meds.

How many meds does your regimen currently contain?

Daily Tegretol XR, Lamictal, Seroquel XR, Klonopin = 4 psychotropic meds

I also take daily Synthroid and Propranolol = +2

Daily total = 6

In addition, I have regular Seroquel (25s and 50s) and Ativan 1 mg pills as prns

I also take a daily multivitamin and Biotin (for my nails).

Q: Did you take a med for a while that you later discovered was fairly useless?

Oh gosh. Pretty much most of what is not on my signature. Saphris, Latuda, all antidepressants, Valproate, Chlorpixal, etc.

Only Saphris was benign. The others either didn't work at all, had bad side effects, or even sent me over the edge.

Do you find that exercise helps your mental health?

no not really. it honestly does nothing for me (apart from making me sore)
favorite self care activity

Watching comedy shows.

Q: Who do you think is the funniest person you know of (either celebrity or person in your life)?

lee mac

he's a stand up comedian + he has his own comeddy show which is really funny. I watch it every week

question: do you remember how you were feeling when you were signing up to this website?

Yes. I was missing group therapy and wanted to talk with people who could understand and offer insight. I felt relieved when I found this site.

What's your favorite song?

Right now it's Chevelle- Shameful Metaphors

Who's your favorite band?